This morning my alarm went off, I rolled over, glanced at the Blackberry and logged into the Twitter sphere (all before brushing my teeth) and was completely bewildered by a barrage of Tweets from Spencer Pratt.

It’s as though the world of Twitter had shut down and Spencer was the only one rambling on as he want to war with @PerezHilton over sex tape and harassment allegations.

The lesser half of the ‘celebrity’ couple that is known as Speidi, Spencer Pratt, has signed up to a Twitter war with celebrity blogger (and someone you DON’T wanna be messing with) Perez Hilton after accusing him of spreading a story that made the pages of the New York Post, which alleges that Pratt’s wife, Heidi Montag was considering suing The Hills creator Adam DeVillo for sexual harassment.

The spat began when the Pratt launched into great raptures on Twitter (rather than in a private arena we don’t really know) about how the story was al started by Perez, and that it was all Hilton’s fault. Okay, fair enough, but couldn’t you make that ONE statement and leave it be Spence? Why insist on posting about a million and making yourself look like an attentions-seeking dimwit in the process?

Spencer begain with the wonderful opener; “I have no respect for you for spewing absolute lies when you could have come to us – You lying B–CH,” before adding;  “Since when do you NOT FACT CHECK your story… I can’t believe I ever backed your b—-ass lying unethical traitor… begging me for quotes one day to blow up your site – u ragged lying hypocrite b–ch.”

To which Perez replied (pretty amazingly) with; “Are you smoking your sister’s meth?”, and consequently, things pretty much went careering downhill from there with Pratt fuming; “We both know what ur sister looks like, do you want me to bring her into it. Ill take it playground… Ill take it street..”

Perez then responded with; “If you want REAL talk, the misunderstanding was I thought you planted that story in the NY Post… You know, just how YOU planted the story to ME about The Hills producer sexually assaulting Heidi. Real talk! Can you handle realness???? You’re used to Heidi’s fakeness, I don’t think you can!!!!”

To which Spencer seemed to completely ignore before bambling on with; “If I retweet what my followers are saying about you – i would have hate crimes filed against me,” adding; “If you’re going to GO THERE,” said Hilton, “Are you ready to tell the world how YOU told me there was a Lauren Conrad sex tape?”

Ouch. It gets worse. Want me to go on? Okay, I will, I’m as morbidly fascinated with a TV nobody having a go at Lady GaGa’s best mate as you are…

Perez: “MTV cut you off after they realized what a f—ing psycho you are! … And if @RyanSeacrest is really going to produce a new Speidi reality show like you’ve been telling people then he’s crazy too!”

Spencer; “[Lady] Gaga is not your real friend moron. she associates with you so Kei$ha the pumpkin doesnt outsell her with her label buying songs… when you wake in the morning do you start your day by pretending your going to find someone who will love you? your unlovable.”

Perez: “YOU sure know a lot about unloveable! Just ask Brody Jenner or any of your other former friends who’ve dropped your ass. Fame and celebrity is all fun, but you’ve let the fame monster consume you, Spencer… When you burn down every last bridge, you’re gonna be stuck on Speidi island and die of starvation!”

Spencer: “i’m not scared of your stupid laptop like this loser celebs in this town! I’M RAW don’t think this is going anywhere Perez! … once PEOPLE.com, USMAGAZINE.com, OMG.YAHOO.com, POPEATER.com, and every REAL COMPANY started a web portal you ENDED B–CH! … your new site and your music label imprint test trial at warner bros failed worse then my rap career !”
Not scared of his laptop? Seriously, couldn’t you think of a better comeback than that? Oh, and ‘OTHER CELEBS’…. LOL.

Perez: “You’re right! I WISH my other endeavors did as well as @HeidiMontag’s music career! I’m so jealous!”

Spencer: “you know that you spoke with Jason Whaler @laurenconrads boyfriend who was shopping the sex tape. you confirmed this with him… now you say on public record that i made up lies and your blog printed lies? @laurenconrad knows it’s real so do you! otherwise.”

Perez: “And who told me there was even an ‘alleged’ tape in the first place??? @SpencerPratt… Jason Wahler NEVER told me there was a SEX tape. But he did say there was a tape that was of a sexual nature… YOU however told me there was a SEX tape, YOU told me to talk to Jason Wahler. Sue me, b–ch! My lawyer is Bryan Freedman.”

Want more? Okay, now it’s time for Lie Detectorgate….

Perez: “Name the time and place and I would HAPPILY take a lie detector test! I am not afraid of the truth! I don’t lie! YOU do!”

Spencer: “Tomorrow you set up the FBI lie detector thru TMZ and you and i will both go in there! you have more time then me so set it up!”

Perez: “@HarveyLevinTMZ Spencer Pratt wants to take a lie detector test against me. I’m happy to! Let’s set it up! I have nothing to hide!”

Spencer: “@HarveyLevinTMZ not just me @heidimontag will do the Lie Detector test as well! @laurenconrad should be there to for her test! NY POST if you want to use SPEIDI fame to sell adds then call me for an actual REAL TRUTH STORY instead of things your FED by the suspects!”

Crikey… this looks like another interesting battle between people who ae famous for… umm, what are you famous for again boys? But with Spencer Pratt having 823,000 Twitter followers and Perez Hilton 1.9 million, we wonder who’s going to be a trending topic first.

Crikey, since when did my journalism career involve going back and forth between Twitter conversations? Now, time to think about the General election, to reignite my brain…

Ruth.x