Tag Archives: MEN

Men Are So… High School

So, I’ve had The Sassy Guide To Picking Up Fit Guys for a couple of days now, and after eating fish and chips for tea I thought it was about time I stopped faffing about and got my ass into gear if I wanted a hot date.

So with brew in hand and my feet up I decided it was time to make a serious go of it.

The first chapter of the book is all about ‘How NOT to pick up your fit guy’ and if I’m honest, you could have changed the names around and you would have been reading about my adolescent years.

As Sam talks about a lad called Ryan Masters, her high school crush and first ever public rejection, it reminds me of the lad I used to obsess over for the final two years of high school. We’ve all had it haven’t we? That guy we used to dream about during our boring Science lessons, who used to make our heart skip when he passed us in the corridor on the way to Maths and most excitingly (as if it was fate) he had P.E outside the French classroom windows which meant a whole hour of watching in run around in shorts. Heaven.

The only problem with my crush was he didn’t know I existed, so when I proceeded to tell the school gossips about my crush I really hoped he’d see me across the playground, fall head over heels in love with me and we’d live happily ever after. There was only one problem with that… Lee didn’t seem to quite have the same great stonking crush on me that I had developed on him. Which obviously made me all the more determined to win him over.

After a couple of months, I pretty much knew his lesson timetable and had a general idea of when and where we’d be passing each other around the campus – hence when I REALLY needed to check my make up and have my boy-dazzling smile at the ready. I was CONVINCED that one day he’d fall for me, I had it all planned out in my head – as I walked down the Science block steps and he ascended into heaven, he’d sweep me up into his arms and confess his love for me in front of the whole of Year 10 & 11. I knew it would happen, I just think I must have been off sick on the day he had planned to do it, and then he chickened out afterwards.

Luckily for me, I never faced the same level of public rejection as the author of The Sassy Guide… but it’s still just as cringe-worthy now to know how I’d been acting like a totally mental stalker for two years of my life. Yet the weird thing is, a few years later I ended up bumping into Lee again and we had a little bit of a kiss and cuddle, but oddly, I just didn’t fancy him anymore. What is it with us girls eh? We obsess about a guy for two WHOLE years, and then he finally wants us and we’re like, ‘No thanks.’

Crazy!

Memphis.xx

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Men Are So… Hard To Find

It’s been a while since I has even a sniff of a decent guy (almost two years in fact) and over the past few months I’ve been quite vocal in my moaning – sadly not THAT kind of moaning – of the lack of fit guys hanging around town.

Oddly, a few days ago I found a copy of “The Sassy Guide To Picking Up Fit Guys” waiting for me on my desk and into my head popped an idea… if I can’t find a guy in the way that I reckon you should be able to, why not have a read of this little book and bag myself a hottie?The sassy guide to picking up fit guys

So, here it goes, to begin with I’d better tell you a bit about my situation I guess…. In my early twenties, I would hardly call myself a ‘munter’ but to be totally honest I wouldn’t call myself the everyday man’s Kelly Brook either. I mean, we’d all like to lose a few lbs here and there, but a packet of Doritos and a glass of wine is often far more tempting than a session at the gym after a hard day at work. Right?

Anyway, I’ve been single since 2008 when I came out of what you might call a long-term relationship. Sadly the prospect of longevity had meant I’d let myself go a little bit and put on quite a bit of weight. In the months that followed I slowly shed the weight (and more) and seemed to start attracting the attentions of guys once again. The only problem was, none of these were remotely ‘fit’ or interesting. Well apart from one, but be ended things over the phone after just a fortnight, so I think I need help.

This is where the book comes into play. I think it’s about time us ladies stop sitting at home watching Wife Swap and get out there and bag that fit guy! Hopefully Samantha Schofield is going to give me all the ammo I need to find my prince, if not there will be trouble.

Follow my blog as I work my way through the book sharing my experiences whether they be good, bad or downright shameful.

Memphis.x

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Do YOU Think Everyone Is Overreacting Re: Lady GaGa’s Cannibal Routine?

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Lady GaGa might have overstepped the oddball mark once and for all after leaving her fans upset and appalled after she pretened to be killed in a cannibal-style attack live on stage.

The star acted out the death scene during her show at the MEN arena as part of her Monsters Ball tour which is currently travelling around here, there and everywhere. At one point she was ’attacked’ from behind by black-clothed dancers who seemed to bite her.

The singer then staggered around as fake blood poured from her neck as she collapsed and ‘died’ in front of thousands of fans. Whilst we know GaGa has used cannibalism in her live shows before, this is the first time it’s coincided with and actual cannibalism story in the British press and so people are understandably pretty miffed.

Whilst a number of critics reckon GaGa should have scrapped the scene out of respect for the dead, do you think people would have been so offended had there not been a spate of murders around the same time?

Lady GaGa is never one to play things by the book, and whilst parents might think a bit of fake blood could be awful for their kids to see, shouldn’t we be more worried that their role model is a woman who walks around in her knickers?

Discuss.

Ruth.x

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