boyfriends and best guy friends and me

quietgrrl · You Go Girl (100+ Posts) Joined: 08 Mar 2005 Posts: 119

i say i love my boyfriend, and truth be told i do. but i also love my best friend (a guy), just not in the same way. i must confess, all 3 of us are virgins, but that's going to change soon. Thing is, I always figured i would have my first time with my best friend who i care about and trust, but i love my boyfriend and wouldnt want to betray him. my best friend is single, and he has feelings for me. he always has. i just, i never go the chills or fluttery heart around him, just a security blanket. and yes, my best friend and i have gotton physical, multiple times, just never a real relationship. now, he's mixed in with this older crowd who would be more than happy to pop his cherry and i say "go for it. do what makes you happy" but a big part of me feels jealous, almost like i'll miss what is rightfully mine. god, it's like i wished i could have had sex already with my best friend, but losing myself to my boyfriend would be special too. i love them both, i really do, just in different ways and for different reasons.

please, any advice. i've been caught in this triangle for so long.

(also, i feel i should add my relationship with my boyfriend has soured the friendship between him and my best friend. my best friend introduced me to him and we fell for each other must to his disappointment)

jamiemac2005 · Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 11:58 am Post subject:

Verve · Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 3:39 pm Post subject:

You're on your way to becoming woman....

I say you should wait. See who sticks around and then have sex with the one still standing.

I'm rooting for the best friend.... Very Happy

noodles · Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 4:44 pm Post subject:

if you're having such dilemas dont sleep with either of em right now.

wait wait wait.

coolman · FemaleFirst Guru Joined: 18 Apr 2008 Posts: 5967

quietgrrl · You Go Girl (100+ Posts) Joined: 08 Mar 2005 Posts: 119

Verve · Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 9:21 pm Post subject:

coolman · FemaleFirst Guru Joined: 18 Apr 2008 Posts: 5967

Verve · Posted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 9:30 pm Post subject:

SybariteGator · Hello. I am New! Talk to Me Joined: 30 Jun 2008 Posts: 15

It sounds like he's been your "best friend" all these years just in hopes of becoming your boyfriend.

I just don't believe that guys and girls can be real friends when there are such strong sexual and emotional feelings involved.

Either set him free or try him out as a boyfriend.

MaxtheGaul · Posted: Mon Jun 30, 2008 10:28 pm Post subject:

I vote for the best friend too, but seriously you have three choices. Neither, either or both.

My advice would be neither fro the time being, you should have sex with someone because you are really really ready for it, not because it is time you popper your cherry.

quietgrrl · You Go Girl (100+ Posts) Joined: 08 Mar 2005 Posts: 119

so, to add to this, my best friend and i were hanging out (my boyfriend knew) and he kissed me and you know something? I just, I had no urge to kiss him back when the moment came down to it. if i'm sitting near him, I don't feel anything and i realize when i'm near my boyfriend, it's like electric. i think i just needed to just, go with it, do what was natural and let my mind be at peace. i let him (the friend) and my other friends convince me of feelings that really weren't there. i sort of feel better knowing that I chose the right one, i just hope that my best friend can accept it...even though a part of me knows he never will. thank you all for your advice. i'll try not to rush, but like this situation, i don't do what i'm supposed to, or not, i try to do what feels right. and i feel that i'm taking a step in the right direction. i hope at least.

Cambridge · Posted: Tue Jul 01, 2008 3:32 am Post subject:

Verve · Posted: Tue Jul 01, 2008 3:51 am Post subject:

True... Unless he was phenomenal...

corecoreb4u · Hello. I am New! Talk to Me Joined: 04 Jul 2008 Posts: 6

think of the cons and pros of each it should lead you to a decision