Alright, me and my girlfriend had been dating for about a year and a half. We were each other's firsts for everything past making out. I had never felt so good being with some one and we had an amazing bond and connection. I had dated other girls before her but never felt anything remotely close to this. She would talk to her friends about how she would marry me right out of high school and how she knew i was the one. (Obviously i wasn't going to get married right out of high school but knowing she loved me that much was great.) Any way, We used to have sex 2 or 3 times a week. Then just sort of ran out of chances, being 17 and having a truck with a cover, the only real opportunity was when no one was home at one of our houses. She eventually said i don't want to have sex anymore because my period was a week late last time and i was too scared. I was going to try and reassure her that as long as i pulled out and wore a condom those chances were ridiculously small. I didn't want to push anything because i loved being with her and was fine with oral sex and such. How ever, the day before i left for 10 days she said " I think we should break up, because if we're meant to be together we will, just later in life." I told her that if we were meant to be together why wouldn't we be together all the time. Well obviously i was completely confused but we were so in love i knew she would just beg for me to take her back the next day, she did and i took her back after she explained that she just wacked out for a minute. So i left for 10 days and said i think we should avoid talking so that you can really see what it would be like to not be with me. So i come home from my trip and call her up, excited to talk to her and she is excited to hear from me. I say i'm sure you've done a lot of thinking, she says yeah, so i say well what conclusion have you come to. I'm just sitting there waiting for "Oh im so sorry i don't know what i was thinking you're the love of my life and i never want to loose you." But instead I got a long pause and my heart just sank and i knew she was going to say no. So she wove a story with many conflicting ideas to explain why she was doing this. The 1st time it was the " If we're meant to be together etc." like i already said. 2nd time it was i won't have time it's my senior year in high school even though she will be less busy than she was last year when we fell in love. And then we talked the night after the second break up and the reason was i don't have feelings for you anymore. So she broke my heart again after i forgave her for doing it once. I haven't talked to her since then (7 days ago) and will wait until she calls me.
Anyway now that you know the story, my question is do I try and get her back since I can't even imagine life without out her. Or sit here miserable for the rest of summer. I know i'm supposed to just let it go but i'm pretty sure thats only if she's made it clear that there is no chance and she hasn't. just 1 month ago she just looked me in the eyes and poured her heart out about how she would die if we weren't together and how amazing it was to be in love. She just sat there and hugged me for a good hour explaining how great we were together and i could tell it was truly heartfelt because she almost cried she was so happy. So i guess what i don't understand is how you can go from loving some one so much that you would marry them and not be able to function without them to no longer having feelings for them. And i've tried everything, staying busy, working out, meeting other girls. But that special connection i had with her before we even officially started going out is not there with any of the girls if met (around 12). And i'm not conceited or anything but I wouldn't have a hard time finding some one to go out with me it's just that i want her back and if you heard and were there when she poured her heart out you would see why. So i know she still has feelings for me because it has to be impossible to loose such strong feelings in only 10 days, right? So basically i have to get her back because i'm utterly lost and can't even imagine being with any one else. Especially after reading the posts that say "yeah i'm married and have kids but i still wish i could be with my true love from High school" I don't want to be like that i want to have her. Could use some advice on how to get her back, rather than how to get over her because I am 100% positive she still has those strong feelings and just wants to... i don't even know, help.
