Does a potential husband have a right to know?

[Fred75]

But this begs the question: does a man, who got a woman pregnant, who then had an abortion, have an obligation to tell a potential wife?

My ex-gf got an abortion without my knowledge after I had recently broken up with her. She then told me about a year later, when we got back together. I don't agree with abortion for me and my family, yet feel this is a personal decision, so I'm so glad that she didn't tell me. We were 16 yrs. old, so certainly the best decision for us, but one that I could have never made. . . since it certainly wasn't the best decision for the baby.

With that first hand experience... should 16 year olds be having sex?
Should 16 year old girls be having abortions?

[coolman]

...

[Fred75]

in a perfect world . . . no. Is it a forgone conclusion today that 16 year old girls are going to have sex (at least many of them)? yes.

For your daughter/children... yes.
For parents that teach their children otherwise... not likely.

Your job IS to raise them with proper morals and values... is it not?

[coolman]

...

[Fred75]

in a perfect world . . . no. Is it a forgone conclusion today that 16 year old girls are going to have sex (at least many of them)? yes.

For your daughter/children... yes.
For parents that teach their children otherwise... not likely.

Your job IS to raise them with proper morals and values... is it not?

do you have a daughter and do you REALLY know what she's doing. Reminds me of our bishop's daughter (I was raised mormon and the bishops can marry). Sweet as hell when he was around, sucking every guy off she met when he wasn't looking.

I'm not saying that your daughter is like that, please don't misunderstand, but I've seen kids with a great upbringing go very far astray . . .

I'd rather teach my children that sex is for two loving adults and that they aren't ready for it yet. However . . . should it happen, only with her consent and with the mandatory condom.

Only my oldest boy is old enough to have had that talk yet. 2 boys (14 and 8 ) 1 girl (16 Months).

And, yes, the girl will get the same talk.

Will you tell your children that condoms are not 100% and that a child died because of your actions of having sex before you were ready for the consequences?

Theres a reason sex is an act to be done after marriage.
No one dies.

[coolman]

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[MaxtheGaul]

With that first hand experience... should 16 year olds be having sex?

Since it's legal for them to get married, absolutely they should.

[coolman]

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[Fred75]

With that first hand experience... should 16 year olds be having sex?

Since it's legal for them to get married, absolutely they should.

I don't agree. I did and my kids most certainly will, but is it right? Fact is most people don't marry at 16 and aren't ready to handle the pressure. When I think back to how many 16 and 17 yr. old girls I talked into sex without a condom (I hate those damn things), they simply aren't ready for the responsibility.

True.
Just because it's legal doesn't mean its right.
Take for instance the legality of two teenagers having sex.
The reason it's legal has nothing to do with it being OK for them at that age.
The reason it's legal is because the prison system would be full of 16 year old idiots if it weren't!

[Hotel_Whiskey]

Yes, until it's time to actually have kids, yu don't no if an abortion has affected you.
There shouldn't be any lies ina true relationship
x x x

[MaxtheGaul]

The reason it's legal has nothing to do with it being OK for them at that age.

The reason doesn't matter. In a free law abiding society you do not have the right to tell someone else who is behaving perfectly legally that they can't do those things. If you don't like it lobby for the law to be changed.

You are entitled to your views (programmed or otherwise), but your idea of the way people should behave would only work in a world of automata.

[Fred75]

The reason it's legal has nothing to do with it being OK for them at that age.

The reason doesn't matter. In a free law abiding society you do not have the right to tell someone else who is behaving perfectly legally that they can't do those things. If you don't like it lobby for the law to be changed.

You are entitled to your views (programmed or otherwise), but your idea of the way people should behave would only work in a world of automata.

The reason does matter because the age does matter.
Unless of course you think it's OK for 16 year old girls to get STD's, pregnant, have miscarriages, abortions and all the other consequences of adult behavior?

And where do you live where everyone is law abiding?
La-La Land?

[MaxtheGaul]

The reason it's legal has nothing to do with it being OK for them at that age.

The reason doesn't matter. In a free law abiding society you do not have the right to tell someone else who is behaving perfectly legally that they can't do those things. If you don't like it lobby for the law to be changed.

You are entitled to your views (programmed or otherwise), but your idea of the way people should behave would only work in a world of automata.

The reason does matter because the age does matter.
Unless of course you think it's OK for 16 year old girls to get STD's, pregnant, have miscarriages, abortions and all the other consequences of adult behavior?

And where do you live where everyone is law abiding?
La-La Land?

You still get confused too easily. I never said anything about everyone being law abiding.

Having sex at 16 does not result in STD's pregnancy etc. any more than having it at 25 avoids these things. You're missing three quarters of the plot.

[Polgara69]

Agreed. I am 36 and am just as likely to get an STD or get pregnant as a 16 year old if we dont use protection. The legal point is true. While it may not be ideal for 16 year olds to be having sex, it is the legal age so you cant say otherwise. If you are talking 15 year old, then yes. But the fact is, in an ideal world everybody would stay virgins until they marry at at least 25 years of age. But we dont live in an ideal world and I for one am not living in an episode of the Waltons. Get real. All you can do as a parent is advise them and make sure they have access to protection. If you have a good relationship with your kids they will tell you. I told my eldest daughter to please tell me when she was having sex so I could get her on the pill and she did. I took her to the doctors and got her on it and also made sure she was well supplied with condoms. I know several here including Fred will call me irresponsible and encouraging them but can anyone here say they wouldnt have done it at that age? I know I was, rightly or wrongly and I know that they will so the least I can do is make sure they are protected. And now she is nearly 21 and in a stable relationship and I am pretty sure happy with the decisions we made. The plain fact is, if they are gonna have sex, they are gonna have sex. Whether we approve or not, they will do it. I prefer to arm mine with condoms and advise.

[Fred75]

The reason it's legal has nothing to do with it being OK for them at that age.

The reason doesn't matter. In a free law abiding society you do not have the right to tell someone else who is behaving perfectly legally that they can't do those things. If you don't like it lobby for the law to be changed.

You are entitled to your views (programmed or otherwise), but your idea of the way people should behave would only work in a world of automata.

The reason does matter because the age does matter.
Unless of course you think it's OK for 16 year old girls to get STD's, pregnant, have miscarriages, abortions and all the other consequences of adult behavior?

And where do you live where everyone is law abiding?
La-La Land?

You still get confused too easily. I never said anything about everyone being law abiding.

Having sex at 16 does not result in STD's pregnancy etc. any more than having it at 25 avoids these things. You're missing three quarters of the plot.

So now a 16 year old girl getting an STD or pregnant and or having a miscarriage or abortion is no different than a 25 year old woman???

Just how old are you?