Hi girls. Didn't go out last night, as my poorly Grandad died yesterday morning.

He has been in and out of hospital for the last few months, and he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer last week, and just deteriorated so quickly. The last couple of days, he was in and out of conciousness, and on a morphine pump,and he just fell asleep and didn't wake up.
All he kept saying to me was you look after that baby, and myself, and he was worried about ruining the birth if he was really poorly (Silly bugger!). He had had enough of being prodded and poked, and didn't want any treatment, so he decided that he would keep his dignity, and he just wanted to be kept comfortable. Friday afternoon, he told us all he loved us, and he was proud of my Dad (his only child) and he thanked my Mum for looking after him for all these years, and then he said he loved my Nan, and then he fell asleep, and probably didn't regain conciousness again. That is exactly what he wanted.
I feel so sad, and miss him like crazy already, and grief keeps coming over me in waves

. Ironically, baby was most active yesterday, as if to remind me that there is life still growing inside of me, even though one has just ended. Ohhh..tearful again, so off to find Mr ODN for cuddles!!! Sorry, it's been so happy on here for a while now! Will write soon xxxx