How to suck your own dick: A Guide for the Spinal

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How to suck your own dick: A Guide for the Spinal Challenged

Postby Guest on Sun Aug 05, 2007 5:32 am

In order to suck yourself off, you need to have one of two things (preferably both): a very flexible spine, or a very long dick. Having a longer penis obviously makes self-sucking easier by decreasing the distance from your C*** head to your mouth, so the longer your dick, the less you have to bend. However, since penis length is something you either have or don’t, we’ll concentrate on what you can do to increase your spinal flexibility.

The easiest and probably most effective position for autofellatio is lying on your back. You’ll probably want to use a bed, sofa, or other cushioned surface for comfort, although practicing on a carpeted floor can sometimes give you better leverage. You should have a wall or a headboard nearby to brace your feet against. Lie down , with the top of your head at least a foot from the wall. Pull your legs up and roll back onto your shoulders, raising your legs over your head. Brace your feet on the wall and “walk” your way down until your crotch is close to your face. Lift your head up if necessary to get closer. If your back feels tight, don’t strain to reach your C***, even if it’s tantalizingly close. Just let your muscles stretch. You may want to use one hand to pull your C*** closer. Suck what you can, if you can – otherwise, just W*** and keep practicing.

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pinkroxy
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Postby pinkroxy on Sun Aug 05, 2007 5:44 am

your funny :lol:
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~twisted~
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Postby ~twisted~ on Sun Aug 05, 2007 8:57 am

Got any tips on how to lick your own p*ssy? :D

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than the secrets everybody guesses!


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drew
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Postby drew on Sun Aug 05, 2007 8:59 am

~twisted~ wrote:Got any tips on how to lick your own p*ssy? :D


its quite easy the trick is making sure the RSPCA dont find out ... sorry couldnt stop that joke if i wanted to
Last edited by drew on Sun Aug 05, 2007 9:40 am, edited 1 time in total.
sorry if the spelling in this post is bad im dyslexic and usaly to lazy to use a spell checker

new pics of me
http://www.femalefirst.co.uk/board/view ... p?t=139894

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~twisted~
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Postby ~twisted~ on Sun Aug 05, 2007 9:33 am

drew wrote:
~twisted~ wrote:Got any tips on how to lick your own p*ssy? :D


its quite easy the trick is making sure the RSPC dont find out ... sorry couldnt stop that joke if i wanted to[/quote

It's a shame I don't get it! What's the RSPC???

There are no secrets better kept ~
than the secrets everybody guesses!


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drew
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Postby drew on Sun Aug 05, 2007 9:41 am

~twisted~ wrote:
drew wrote:
~twisted~ wrote:Got any tips on how to lick your own p*ssy? :D


its quite easy the trick is making sure the RSPC dont find out ... sorry couldnt stop that joke if i wanted to[/quote

It's a shame I don't get it! What's the RSPC???


DOH i ment RSPCA (Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals) still geting over food posining so not realy on the ball
sorry if the spelling in this post is bad im dyslexic and usaly to lazy to use a spell checker

new pics of me
http://www.femalefirst.co.uk/board/view ... p?t=139894

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~twisted~
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Postby ~twisted~ on Sun Aug 05, 2007 9:50 am

drew wrote:
~twisted~ wrote:
drew wrote:
~twisted~ wrote:Got any tips on how to lick your own p*ssy? :D


its quite easy the trick is making sure the RSPC dont find out ... sorry couldnt stop that joke if i wanted to[/quote

It's a shame I don't get it! What's the RSPC???


DOH i ment RSPCA (Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals) still geting over food posining so not realy on the ball


My pussy loves to be licked!

(Sorry to hear you have been feeling bad).

There are no secrets better kept ~
than the secrets everybody guesses!


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drew
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Postby drew on Sun Aug 05, 2007 9:56 am

~twisted~ wrote:

My pussy loves to be licked!

(Sorry to hear you have been feeling bad).


mine are self cleaning the lick them selfs :shock:

(thanks feeling better today :))
sorry if the spelling in this post is bad im dyslexic and usaly to lazy to use a spell checker

new pics of me
http://www.femalefirst.co.uk/board/view ... p?t=139894

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Postby The Phantom Ejeculator on Sun Aug 05, 2007 2:18 pm

If all men could suddenly suck their own dicks, women would be obsolete in a heart beat & half the world would be late for work! :D

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~twisted~
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Postby ~twisted~ on Sun Aug 05, 2007 6:55 pm

Noooo..... :) Men like doggy style too much!

Makes me think of a couple of lines in some movies.

"I'm the king of the world!!!"

and...

"I'ts good to be the king!"

There are no secrets better kept ~
than the secrets everybody guesses!


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jinjin
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Postby jinjin on Mon Aug 06, 2007 2:18 am

For men who lack the flexibility, there is an alternative ... http://tinyurl.com/zav0
Image

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THAT_GUEST
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Postby THAT_GUEST on Mon Aug 06, 2007 2:52 am

Jinjin, I challenge you to a Lightdildo/sabre duel! :lol:
Chikan, bukakke, paipan,....more badness to come!

Are college girls unpaid whores?

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jinjin
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Postby jinjin on Mon Aug 06, 2007 4:30 am

:lol: :lol: :lol:

I see you have been exploring the site.


:lol: :lol: :lol:
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THAT_GUEST
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Postby THAT_GUEST on Mon Aug 06, 2007 4:35 am

for whatever reason, your links are interesting to me. I couldn't resist. The light sabre dildos :lol: :lol:
Chikan, bukakke, paipan,....more badness to come!

Are college girls unpaid whores?

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jinjin
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Postby jinjin on Mon Aug 06, 2007 3:43 pm

Your comment reminded me of the fight scene between Lone Star and Dark Helmet in Mel Brook's Space Balls. :lol:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ee7PmhT9Nyw
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