Husbands & Porn??

[donna31]

i wouldn't be bothered by my husband looking at porn, but he doesn't seem to like it very well. it is too staged, too artificial for him. he really can't tolerate the fake orgasms with all the squalling women sounding like stepped on cats. he enjoys looking at beautiful nude women such as the pictures on sites like Met-Art and when he sees a particularly nice picture he calls me over to see it. some people enhance their sex with porn, but porns fakery just pisses my husband off and adds nothing to bedroom time. Mel likes reality, he has a tough time suspending his disbelief so he can enjoy films, tv, etc. i can't tell you how many times i have heard him say how no one would react to a situation like that and he when he sees something that strikes him as unreal/stupid, he just quits watching the program. i rather like porn though. i often look at it on the internet and sometimes use my hand on my self to enhance the experience. one time we were watching a bit of porno i found. while the woman was being f*cked, she was screaming all kinds of things like "f*ck me harder, put that big c*ck in my hot box, etc" she was screaming very loudly too. Melvin looked at for a minute and said, "someone needs to put a pillow in that big yap. and she can't fake an orgasm for S*** either." he walked away disgusted with it., muttering " no class, no taste". I think that is what pisses him off the most.....there is very little or no good taste in porno.

[davian]

I think that is the one big reason it doesn't do much for me either, Donna . . . seeing a beautiful woman naked is fine of course - my girlfriend is bi & likes this too - but what happens usually appears fake and mechanical. I would prefer less explicit & more real looking sex, so I tend to find a well acted film with sex scenes more arousing than most actual porn.

I have seen very few examples where either the acting was good enough (or else the participants were in fact enjoying themselves & had the chemistry they appeared to have), but I found these much more exciting.

Watched a DVD with my girlfriend recently, which we picked up very cheap from a guy in a pub. From the amount we watched, it showed the same girl in a selection of clips from different films. It was pretty standard explicit porn, except every so often she would suck some guys C*** & then start to make sounds exactly like a turkey . . . We had to stop watching, we were laughing so much it hurt! And to be honest I found the experience of the two of us buying the porn from the guy in the the pub for more erotic than what was on the DVD . . .

[teasedsilly]

Consider this. If he's looking at porn because he's missing something from the relationship, then demanding that he repress those feelings does absolutely nothing to resolve them. If anything, it just drives him further away from you, as he tries unsuccessfully to fight his own desires.

If you want his full attention, then earn it. Show an interest in what turns him on when he's looking at porn, and see if you can spice things up. If he feels that he can be open with you about what he likes, he will be open and you'll both benefit. If you take his fantasies as a challenge to the relationship and meet them with hostility, he will hide them from you (but they won't go away).

[lady canuck]

I don't understand why the ring has to come off, do have a video camera on the pc? is he doing something on camera that would make him hide the ring?
watching porn is NOT cheating, but lying to you is not good either. I don't know any men who don't watch it or download it. you have overreacted in that area, and may be causing all your other issues with him.
going home at lunch to watch it means he is hooked on it, you ned to do something to spiceup your sexlife. read some of the stuff on here, dress sexy for him, tease him, strip for him, use toys (didoos), to get yourself going. let him watch you masturbate

[anonymateus.]

You have chosen the wrong villain.

Your true villain is the fact that your husband doesn not seem to want to take your needs in consideration, that's a serious issue.

He lied to you because you were asking of him something he was not willing to do, but he didn't want you to leave him, so his lying is partially from your innability to accept his immutable habit of looking at porn - he is very unlikely to stop, no matter what you do (I wouldn't stop)

BUT

Supose he did stop watching porn. Would your married life get any better? Probably not - you would still not get off, he would still ask you to *act* like a pornstar, you would still feel inadequate.

It seems you need to do two things in order to solve this issue.
one of them is simple: have an honest conversation with him, explain your complaints about your sexual frustration and your insecurities.

The other one is difficult, but a lot more important: try to solve your self-steem issues, because from what you said YOU don't seem to take you own needs into consideration, maybe even believing you suck in bed (when he is the one who is unwilling to try harder to give you pleasure). You believe that those pornstars are better then you, that's why you feel jealous and cheated. Well, they are not. They are not even real, just a bunch of pixels in a computer screen. It is not them that are a threat to your married life, and it is not them the cause of your husband's apparent lack of interest in you. Find the real enemy.

I trully wish the best for you and you husband, hope you can get this problem solved and enjoy a happy married life

[The Chairman]

disgusting.....

[Kelli K]

I don't mind my husband looking at porn on his computer, but i do not like him touching himself while viewing it. If he gets turned on and hard from looking at it, i make him assume his place on his knees in front of me and use a toy up his bum to make him cum. That way he is cumming for me and not the porn, and it keeps him off my back for sex when I am not in the mood.

Kelli K

Find me at: www.KelliUnleashed.com

[The Chairman]

I don't mind my husband looking at porn on his computer, but i do not like him touching himself while viewing it. If he gets turned on and hard from looking at it, i make him assume his place on his knees in front of me and use a toy up his bum to make him cum. That way he is cumming for me and not the porn, and it keeps him off my back for sex when I am not in the mood.

Kelli K

Find me at: www.KelliUnleashed.com

disgusting...

[Carmel]

I caiught my husband looking at diaper fetish porn.

Instead of getting angry i went out and bought diapers and plastic pants.

Now when he comes home from work i pin him into his diaper and plastic pants and make him eat my pussy til i'm satisfied.

Then i make him jerk off into his diaper while i tell him how pathetic he is!

And if i catch him looking at porn i pull his diaper down and give his ass a good hard spank!

[SWINGER]

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[dontlikeitmuch]

I find porn a bit boring now, although it was quite exciting many years ago, so we don't watch it. My husband still does when I am out and when he travels with work he tells me he often watches porn in the hotels and m*sturbates to it for relief. I don't have a problem.