Sex and Dating Advice Needed (Urgent)

[Guest]

I am a 24 year old healthy male and as wussy as it sounds, I am still a virgin

I may not be brad pitt, but i am not ugly; my looks are ok, i am tall (6' 2''), physically fit and i am pretty smart and fun to talk to.

Despite all this, I have not had any luck dating and at having sex. I feel that this is affecting my personal life and also my performance at work.

I earnestly ask all the women here, what am I doing wrong? How can I have a sexual life?

[Guest]

1st of all its not wussy.....everyones first time happens at different stages in their lives and preferably should ONLY happen when it feels right - not just beacause u want to get the 1st time over with.

Have u ever found a woman u really click with...thats what u need. maybe you're looking to hard. I found that i click with guys when i am no longer looking, so am happy being single!! I think that if you are happy with your singledom life you are more attractive and intersting to others - they want to share in it!

does that help at all?

[Guest]

I am a 24 year old healthy male and as wussy as it sounds, I am still a virgin

I may not be brad pitt, but i am not ugly; my looks are ok, i am tall (6' 2''), physically fit and i am pretty smart and fun to talk to.

Despite all this, I have not had any luck dating and at having sex. I feel that this is affecting my personal life and also my performance at work.

I earnestly ask all the women here, what am I doing wrong? How can I have a sexual life?

I'm in the same boat as you mate but 28. I met a few girls when I was late teens but I never got round to having sex, I have now given up even trying to get a GF and as funny as this sounds it aint that bad (used to it) but this is my choice I suppose-you are probably different. I couldn't go and have sex now with someone of a similar age anyway because I have no experience, which would be pretty much end in disaster



[/quote]

[Guest]

if you find the right person it wouldn't be a disaster.....even if she is more experienced than you.
that doesnt matter.....she will love you for you not for your sexual experience. plus with every new partnre it is almost like your first time again...u have to take time to find out which buttons to press.
dont worry guys, the right lass is out there somewhere.....if u get really stuck i'll help you out! lots of my friends just wish they could find a nice caring guy, and you both sound like you would fit the bill!!

[rykert]

I am the original creator of this message.

From the advice given so far, I should stop looking and the "right" women will automatically drop into my life.

Well I am not sure how effective that would be. Upto now I haven't looked for women that seriously and the result is that I have none. And in my line of work, I do not get to meet that many women. And being a virgin at my age, many women I meet for the first time will probably assume that I am impotent or gay!

It is not about just sex. About all my friends have their girlfriends and most of the time my friends are busy with their girlfriends. Without anyone, I am getting more and more pensive and lonely.

As much as I like a relationship that is spontaneous and not premeditated, I feel like if I do not take action and hook up with someone, I won't end up in a very comforatable spot.

To all the women out here, please give me some advice on how to attract women........[/u]

[DevilInTheWoods]

Fellers.... you need to do something about this. If you can't get laid, get a hooker or something. You'll never pick up women if you're not confident, a nd your posts simply drip with unconfidence...

Go bust your cherries, get som e'experience', nail down the practical side of things and reassure yourselves that you know what's what and what goes where, THEN strut your stuff.

Trust me, it's ALL about confidence. Nothing to do with looks, dosh or anything else. If you're confident, cheeky, approachable - you'll be beating them off with a stick.

[blueskies]

I'm sorry if my previous post wasnt very helpful.....

I understand it isnt all about sex, you want to have a best friend too. And that is GREAT!! Lots of guys arent good at remembering that bit and if its a long term thing you're after then its a very important point.

If you can, try and socialise with a completely different group of people.....bars and clubs arent the best place to meet people wanting a serious relationship...try and broaden your horizons a bit more than that.

Always remember to be yourself......dont lie to make yourself look good....it doesnt work!!

Try being friends first that way you can build up trust first.

And just be nice!!! Dont try and act like a sex god or anything because that is a real turn off. You sound like a nice guy.....girls like that.

If you find someone you like just give them love care and attention....be interested in THEM and respect them....thats all relationships boil down to really!

good luck

[rykert]

Fellers.... you need to do something about this. If you can't get laid, get a hooker or something. You'll never pick up women if you're not confident, a nd your posts simply drip with unconfidence...

Go bust your cherries, get som e'experience', nail down the practical side of things and reassure yourselves that you know what's what and what goes where, THEN strut your stuff.

Trust me, it's ALL about confidence. Nothing to do with looks, dosh or anything else. If you're confident, cheeky, approachable - you'll be beating them off with a stick.

Can you please tell me just how I can show this "confidence"? Not to brag, but I do seem to have lot of personality, most of the guys I know have a great deal of respect for me and I am pretty popular among people I know. But just how am I supposed to get this "confidence"?

[DevilInTheWoods]

>But just how am I supposed to get this "confidence"?

Well what I'm talking about is sexual confidence. You want a woman to be able to look at you and think "that feller looks like he'd give me a good time".

That confidence comes from you KNOWING, deep down, that you're a shit-hot lover who can tip any girl over the edge - that'll show in your smile, in your manner, in your body language with a woman. You can't fake it - and you can't hide it either.

Come on you girls - back me up here. True innit?

So get laid, get skilled, get comfortable with sex.

[newcastlesteve23]

Normally I wouldnt agree with Devilinthewoods theory of "go an get a hooker" LOL ... but I have to say that particularly in the case of guest who said
"I couldn't go and have sex now with someone of a similar age anyway because I have no experience, which would be pretty much end in disaster"

it might not actually be a bad idea. Get your first time out the way and then you wont be so worried about it.

[newcastlesteve23]

Actually - as daft as it sounds if you have any really good female friends, they might be willing to help you out

[hi_there]

I am 37. I have found one and only one sure-fire method of developing relationships with women (which often do become sexual relationships.) Here is my secret:

Open up and talk with them.

No one is going to hand you what you want if they don't know what that is. You may be really surprised just how many of your female acquaintances will be more open with you in return once they realize that you aren't putting on a false front, being judgmental or interested in NOTHING but sex.

When they do open up to you, listen. Remember that even if the subject seems unimportant that there is something important in what they are telling you - their feelings, your reaction etc.

Don't be afraid to just be open. You'd be amazed how kind and loving virtually all women are, I know I am still.

[jonnyboy]

I definitely agree with the poster who suggests visiting a hooker. I was in a similar situation - getting older and realising that any girl my own age would have had several relationships and not be interested in someone like me who wouldn't have the confidence.

I started visiting massage parlours and now I've had nearly 60 women. My confidence is much higher and I know that the first girl I have a relationship with is going to have a very good time. It's also made me less conscious about body issues I have which previously made me too shy to even take my top off in the company of others.

[DevilInTheWoods]

LOL!

Listen mate, after 60 whores I think you are ready for the real world....

[MadelineS]

Why in the world would you want your first time to be with a hooker? Yes, a girl may be a bit concerned about you still being a virgin, but at the same time it's great for her. You come in with no baggage, no hang ups, and are more than likely going to be incredibly eager and will listen to what she wants! The downside to having sex with a virgin is the very strong feelings that person develops for their first lover. Everyone remembers their first experience, so wait until it's with someone you know and like, not some random hooker who won't even remember your name next week.

as someone else said, confidence will attract the girls, but it's not necessarily sexual confidence. there's a guy at work that has all the girls' attention. i didn't think of him in a sexual way when i first met him...but i wanted to get to know him better...and am working on that he's just confident about himself, doesn't really care what others think, isn't trying to impress anyone and is fun to be around. i'm sure i could eventually sleep with him if it went in that direction, as would most the other girls at work. his self confidence is unbelievably attractive. strangely enough, he doesn't talk about sex a lot and that is also a turn on...it gets annoying when all a guy wants to talk about it is sex related things.