16, pregnant and confused

[babycakes88]

Im 16 and in 9 days time im going to be travelling about 60/70 miles to get an abortion. I just wondered if there is any1 who has been through this becuase my mum doesn't know and my now ex isn't really being very supportive and im finding this really difficult to cope with on my own.im so scared, ive never had an operation before and ive been told that there are anit-abortion activists outside the clinic and im just really scared. Can anyone who's been through this or anyone who can offer any advice please post a reply. Im about 6 and a half weeks. Thanks xx

[TheGirlHasNoName]

i can't offer u advice but i hope it all turns out okay, and i'm glad ur ex is being supportive. And i support your decision for an abortion rather than have a child that you could probably neither support or provide for - something that a lot of teenage mums seem to do. Good luck to you.

[eunce]

If you have a friend who you trust, then take a friend. I hope you are okay. It is really awful for you that your ex is not being supportive, so you need someone else who you can trust.

I went to have an abortion in march (I decided not to do it, so I can't tell you exactly what comes afterwards). There were activists outside: I just ignored them and walked straight past. Don't feel angry at them: they're just doing what they believe in, but they have no right to tell you what to do

The best advice I can give you is this: don't listen to what anyone else says about you being pregnant. What you do is your choice. Listen to YOURSELF and noone else. You're the only one who can make choices for you: not your ex, not the right-to-lifers, not your mum, but only you.

It was the hardest I ever had to make - I feel for you right now that you're going through that. I wish you good luck and I hope that you are okay.

[Guest]

Agree with eunce - take a friend. Take several. It is your right to have an abortion. It is legal. Right to life activists are trying to put women back in the stone age. Ever notice how so many of them are men? Hold your head up high because in doing so you are showing other women that we do have the right to decide to abort and that no one can stop that.

Saying that, an abortion is a medical procedure and you will feel bad. I would suggest taking a few days off afterwards to recuperate and make yourself feel better. Read books and inform yourself about your rights. Read about christian groups construct the fetus as a baby to guilt women into feeling bad about abortion. What is inside you now is not a baby. It's a clump of cells that you need to get rid of *before* it becomes a baby.

[notaneraser]

You are in a tough place, esp since your ex isnt being supportive. But you have to find someone you trust who will tell you the truth and NOT what you want to hear. Maybe someone a little older or who has been in your shoes. Make sure you know why you are having an abortion, just because you have one does not make the situation become erased. You will always know and remember this and think of the baby that could have been, it is not an eraser, your choice but not an eraser. You still have to deal with it. I know I have been there, it is not easy. My procedure was horrible, it left me feeling horrible for days. I felt like I killed a part of myself. Find someone who will totally be there for you.