Rampant Rabbit

[Hannah]

A few months back a brought a Rampant Rabbit from an Ann Summers party. I had heard so much about it i just had to get one. I told my boyfriend, who I had been with for about a month, and he really didnt seem keen. he hated the thought of me using it let alone just having it!. He said he felt that it was better than him and made him feel useless. I can understand how he felt, this huge vibrating thing that could bring me to climax in minutes! A few months past and I never mentioned the thing. but he would keep making comments about it and we would have arguments about it all the time. Eventually he told me too get rid of it. I could see how upset he was and I couldnt bare to lose he so I did.

The problem is, I would love to experiment in bed. but he just wont. even me mentioning to him, hey lets do somthing diffenrent tonight makes him feel useless and he thinks im asking him to do different stuff coz he's not satisfiying me. I just wish he would be more open minded about things and not get so worried!

How can I introduce new things into bed without him jumping a mile?!

[pathfinder]

well if its the thing i think your talking about ... butt, vagina, clit dildosdildos ) so maybe do/get something that dosent look like a trident head Ive been thinking of getting a clit vibrator c**k ring. Maybe that? The thing is alot of men will think you buying that toy is say petting is rubbish, sex is rubbish and hey look this thing can play with my bum at the same time. We know thats not true but he might not. So start on something less shocking, also theres still roleplay, sexy clothes etc. Maybe you need to explore his and your own body more too. Read up on the forums here. Theres plenty of healthy ideas about.

[big rob]

Hi there this thing about the rampant rabbitt I would have thought that any guy who sees his girlfriend using one would be a big turn on I know that when my girlfriend used one I sprung to attention quick damm quick if you get my drift but not all guys are like me I only have to see her take it out of the drawer and way hey if the guy really loves you then he would join in with the fun it could be that he might be afraid and that you will use it all the time and get rid of him but the other thing you could do is sit him down and talk it through with him just tell him that the real thing is out of this world but you want to try something different spice our sex life up who knows if I was with you I would go out and buy you some more even sexy undies if you was going to turn me on then wow let it happen.

[tryanythingtwice]

I think it's a real shame he get's jealous and competitive with a TOY. Can I ask a personal question? Does he bring you to orgasm every time? Probably not, as women's orgasms are complex and mysterious. This can make a guy feel inferior and useless (and thus causes many women to fake it to keep their guys happy). He just needs to get over it. But that won't happen very easily. Maybe you can help.

Normally, I would say "boot him" if he doesn't support your desire to express yourself sexually (or doesn't even support your right to an orgasm with a vibrator). But it sounds like you want to keep him. Therefore, you need to broach this issue with him. Try to talk to him AWAY from the bedroom about how you'd like to play with him. Maybe over a candlelight dinner at home, or in a dark corner of a bar where it can seem naughty to whisper in his ear. Make it sexy, and not clinical.

Start with some simple things, like asking him not to move while you ravish him a half-dozen different ways. Then maybe introduce a blindfold. Put the focus on him, so he doesn't feel like he has to be "original" since you are the one doing it. I'm sure there's lots of other suggestions out there to ease him in.

In the meantime, away (far away) from the bedroom, talk to him about orgasms, about how they are different and challenging for women. About how the vibrator is not competition but assistance. Don't make it threatening, but more enlightening. Reassure him that you are thrilled by his C***, but your body responds in different ways than his. And tell him it would make you really hot if he would play with you, and the toy. Have this conversation over and over again. In subtle ways and open ways., keep the dialogue going. because if you don't talk about sex and this issue, your whole relationship will suffer.

And in the end, if he won't meet you halfway, you have two choices. Surrender to a boring life of missionary sex and insecurity. Or dump him for someone who's willing to respect your needs and desires.

BTW, I am a lesbian. I can assure you that each woman comes in her own way. I've been with women who simply can't come without a vibrator. I've been with a wiman who couldn't come unless she was face-down, blindfolded, with me cussing in her ear. No shame in however you like to play the game.

[Not_so_precious]

Your bf seems a precious little soul. I have a feeling he is quite young. Talk to him and try to make him understand that masterbation is normal even when in a relationship. If he can't accept that then you have a problem. If he keeps going on about it then I would suggest you find someone more grown up. I would have thought it would have turned him on.

[femaleadmin]

Couldn't miss the opertunity to say you can view our selection here
Rampant Rabbit

[Guest]

For me it is the other way around. I would like my girlfriend to try using toys, but she is very conservative and dismisses toys whenever they are mentioned.
I really like the idea of playing with her.
I told her I had bought something to play with (didn't say what) and she seemed upset about it and it turned her right off.
I have not mentioned it since and she does not know what I've bought.
(It is a rabbit)
I am a bit stuck as to how to re-broach the topic, as I do not want to give up - I think the results could be wonderful for both of us.

(I think the fact that society considers sex shops to be dirty places has a big part to play in preventing quieter people from experimenting.)

[longdistance]

My fiance and I have been involved in a long distance relationship for 2 of the last 3 years. Early on, we started having "cyber sex", which was ok, but then she mentioned to me that she was curious about vibrator etc, so she bought a selection. Once we met, we were able to put these toys into practice together. I'd highly recommend incorporating sex toys into ANY sex life... I've even bought a few of my own, so I can join in the fun.

[Guest]

I have a 'rabbit' and yes its true it can make me cum very quickly, but its not a substitute for my partner, its an added extra! I have quite a range of toys and my partner knows about them all and regularly uses them on me. He doesnt have a problem with them at all, have you suggested he uses it on you? maybe that way he would feel that he is still in 'control' of the bedroom, or ask him if he'd like to watch you using it on yourself, most blokes would love to see their partner masturbating.

Failing all that i would keep it and use it when he's not around! Seriously though i would be asking myself why i wanted to be with someone who in this day and age was so prudish about what is not dirty or shameful etc, i cant believe that there are women that don't own a vibrator or men that disaprove of them.

[Sonny1973]

i wouldn't mind if my girlfriend had a stable of sex toys: dildosvibrator, Anal dong, massager, etc. one for every occasion. less work for me

[Exodus]

Don't get me wrong, I love the idea of my g/f playing with herself in front of me. It turns me on a lot seeing ho she does it, and what she enjoys, etc. However, when it comes to dildosvibrator, I'm not too enthralled over those. I mean, if she wants something to please her, or she wants something inside her, why can't she comes to me? Why wouldn't my c*ck be good enough for her? Its just a guy thing I guess. We don't like the idea of being replaced by plastic, lol

[Donny]

A lady using the viberators and toys with her guy is ok, where trouble looms is when she uses them alone.

[anitaleeds]

Donny

That's garbage. My other half works away quite a lot. Why should he have any more of a problem with me using a vibe while he's away than I would him having a W*** ?

Ridiculous and insecure, that's what I call it.

[Donny]

I was not refering to when a couple is away from each other, (no problem) I was refering to situations where the woman uses her viberator, the man is home, but she don't give any to her man, or next to none.

[UScpl]

:o A lady using the viberators and toys with her guy is ok, where trouble looms is when she uses them alone.

Why would her using it alone be a problem? Is it any different than a male masturbating in the shower while his wife is asleep? I use toys on my wife regularly, but I also know she uses them to masturbatemasturbatemasturbation is a healthy part of any good marriage so if its her fingers, a shower head, or her rascally rabbit its all the same in the end. We still have great sex when we are together.