Thank You Marilyn King !

[Lena]

Posting late today , Karin's jeep wudn't start and had to drive her over to the dealer to get it fixed.Unless you stay in some big city with subways and buses we all need cars here and when they aren't working it's huge crisis . They think it's the fuel injection which guess is what gets gas to the engine so the car can run .



Today's post has 2 subjects no less and full of commentary on each of them . That's about as deep-meaty -substantive this blog has ever gotten . Like a over worked car engine my brain might overheat after finishing ................ The first is just a account of a wedding reception I worked saturday nite with the second being the lessons or maybe better put insights that came out of it about why we possibly choose the people we do to fall in love with .


Saturdays Wedding Reception ............The Jamie Show or Mr. Narccissm Live In Person


As I always write do about 30-40 wedding receptions a year and being so many they all more or less are the same .The only time now I can recall any single ones is when something stand out .............can be big things like the one where the 22 year old young bride had been a cheerleader in high school and college with her teammates doing a huge cheer leading routine for her Or this very quiet and dignified wedding of 2 50 somethings who had been high school sweethearts and after 40 some years FINNALLY made it to the alter . Other things too , like if they had a good or bad band or what the flowers were like since you really do see some gorgeous arrangements .Saturdays will stand out mainly because of the bride's father who while not even thinking turned the reception into THE JAMIE SHOW with him having the time of his life performing and in the process being a complete mothergrabber stealing the attention away from his daughter on her special day . But while she had to have been hurt after thinking about it came to see how in more ways then one she'd gotten past daddy's narcissism and used it to grow as a person .


A big reception , 175 people . Moi worked it with Cassady and one of the Mexicans( who knew maybe 5 words of English which made it so easy dealing with him ) being our bar back or helper . As always Cassady is in new shoes, this time black alligator heels she says were from France although she always says ( with smugness dripping from every word ) her new shoes are from someplace fancy in Europe but in truth are usually from Taiwan or China .But that's a shoe addict for you ! Since they just replaced the carpet in the Grande Ballroom moi had her shoes off enjoying the feeling of the deep new carpeting working barefoot the whole shift . April whose the Front Desk boss and acting general manager came by looking very much the boss and in charge in a black pantsuit . Some have been worrying since she's the head honcho she'll let power go to her head and be a dictator . But don't think that's the case , seeing me in stockings feet she laffed and said how she can't wait to get out of her heels . Cassady was jealous of our joking , later asked me if I was April's spy .


A big wedding , 175 people . The bridal couple were in there late 20's and when you looked close at them they seemed to be different types..................at first! The bride was gorgeous , a real starlet type with shining brunette hair , perfect hair and make-up as well as am sure capped teeth . Not a ounce of fat on her, in fact had almost sculptured body .The groom though was a nerdish type . Had a beard , black horned rim glasses and a little overweight . But after a while noticed how she was despite looking like someone from a tv show very low very low key and sensible- like .The groom was pretty much the same way and although while looking like he was a geek who you'd think just wanted to be home building a new computer or studying Sanskrit he was very nice to everyone thanking them for coming . The real difference appearance & personality wise was with the family . The groom's mom was plain and frumpy , very modest jewelry too.His father was definitely blue collar , even making joke about being in a tux that he called a 'monkey suit ' for the first time in his life .The brides mom though was a glamourite, she had perfect hair and make-up and long red nails . Along with a very tight face from recent plastic surgery she bragged about to one and all. In fact her face was sso tight I bet you could bounce a basketball off it . But also cold and lacking any humanity . In a sexxy gold strapless gown with a gold pendant around her neck so big it could choke a elephant .


The brides folks were divorced with her mom married to some generic 50-60 something white male with his hair combed over a bald spot at front .Her daddy was very different , much more youthful seeming ( whose name was Jamie so we knew right away he was a native southerner since no 50 year old from up north or out west wud still be calling himself a kid's name at that age ) being good looking being tall with lean with obviously styled white hair and of course capped teeth . He was the life of the party type too, being very gregarious ( new word ) and social thriving away on the party atmosphere . Someone said he used to be a entertainer , the only specifics I got was that he played guitar for Steve Wariner ( don't worry if you haven't heard of him since he's a C&W singer pretty much limited to the south ) and had performed on cruise ships. He was friendly to his new son in law who I guess he'd only met the nite before and his folks . But quickly moved on to chat up a 20 something about his daughter's age ..................Cassady and I knew right away he was a cockhound .


Also a attention hound or attention hoare too ................ When they had the Father-Daughter dance he acted like everyone was watching him not his daughter and even took a bow when finishing . Watching him and the x though was almost painful . There was 0 warmth between them and you could tell each saw dancing with the other as torture.You see that alot at weddings when the folks are divorced. Not long after while the 6 piece band was playing he was up onstage singing with them .That's not unusual either but usually the guest belt out one only one song and poorly .Jamie though was good and also having the time of his life. And NOT about to leave the stage !!!! The lead guitar player looked little startled when Jamie stayed on stage but still went along .Soon Jamie had let loose with 4 songs , including Elvis's I CAN'T HELP FALLLING IN LOVE WITH YOU , what moi at least thinks is that sickeningly corny IT'S A WONDEFUL WORLD ,and o get the crowd moving on the dance floor PROUD MARY .Even grabbing a drum stick to help the drummer by hitting the cymbals as he sang away ...........


In between a few numbers being the star thanking everyone for coming to his daughter's wedding then going on and on then on and on some more about himself . " As many of you know I spent years in show business and working with everyone from Johnny Cash to Billy Ray Cyrus to Barbara Mandrell .... " , " I did the last number in Vegas with Carl Perkins and we had the entire lounge in a giant conga line ....." ., and no doubt a huge lie " Elvis once said to me about I CAN'T HELP FALLING IN LOVE ....." He finished the set off doing a duet of the old song DON'T KNOW MUCH ABOUT HISTORY with his teen age daughter being so flamboyant herself was a chip of the old block .


Some of the other guests were amused while others weren't .Cassady 's opinion shifted with her now seeing Jamie as a great performer and man of the world . Some of the grooms family thought he was funny , other's saw him as a attention getter / buffoon . The real insightful observations came from those that knew him the best and they weren't good . At the bar several middle aged guys were laffing at how as always Jamie has to be the center of attention , one even saying how Jamie had once done what amounted to a comedy routine at a wake . His ex was positively bitter and angry needing a double martini to calm down , we heard her say ." Just look at that son if a bitch up there acting like a superstar and loving father when I had to put him in jail to get support " which here is money for thee kids . Luckily however daughter didn't hear that or even show much emotion over daddy trying to hijack the reception turning into the JAMIE SHOW . She and her more rock solid and grounded new hubby just kept making the rounds thanking the guests .During the break a couple of people from the band were at the bar including the fuming female lead singer who'd been sidelined by that self obsessed ham . Although nobody said anything you could tell they did not liked having there show hijacked too and being turned into Jamie's back -up band It must been harder for the band to take since the bride's mom said she was paying for everything including the band , not Jamie who I wud bet is broke .


The Jamie problem though came to a quick end when the second set came around As the band got on stage he suddenly appeared with shades and a ball hat turned around wanting to do more , including a rap number he wrote . The bald guy who was lead guitar player politely telling him they don't do rap and then all of a sudden breaking into fast number with a more then annoyed Jamie shuffling off . I chuckled seeing how upset the vain old fool was at not being able to perform and be the center of attention . Boo who. BUT you never have to worry about narcissists like Jamie since they always bounce back with more selfishness and attention craving nonsense . He was soon back to chatting up another woman about the brides age who seemed to be eating it all up . The last I saw of Jamie was after the reception ended , he was leading a group of maybe 20 people including the younger woman he'd been hitting on to party some more in the bar . I almost felt sorry for weird Norm who as working the bar that nite . That kind of crowd keeps you running , is hard as hell to get out at closing ( you get to the point late at nite where you just want to scream " GET THE F*CK OUT YOU MOTHERUCKING BAR FLYS " ) and are not big tippers. Then again many times as I've carried most of the load when working with lazyer then lazy weird Norm was happy to see him get swamped by Jamie and what you know he had to see as his entourage ...............


Jamie was quite the experience and I hoped everybody was amused reading about such a mega warhead . But there's more . A I thought seeing him and how others reacted got me thinking about why we choose the people we do as partners . Am no expert on relationships by anty means . But do believe we can be drawn to the wrong person by not really thinking about them and life with them . Do believe Jamie's very appearance conscious ex was originally drawn like a moth to the flame by Jamie's looks and vibrating personality . She must have had a colossal shock seeing how totally selfish that guy was . The same with her daughters but in different ways . The way she was close to her dad singing there up on stage do believe there youngest daughter will someday ( if she hasn't already ) take up with a attention getter and me -first guy like her daddy then get hit in the face with trouble .


BUT the ex while still so superficial looking herself seemed to have moved on to another kind of man . Like the unloud, unattention getting generic middle aged guy she is married to now . Best of all I was delited to see how the bride had somehow picked a low key regular responsible monosodium /Dan Mc kind of guy guy who you can rely on . Also happy /very impressed too how she wasn't letting her dad's total assholeliness at the reception bother her and ruin the special day . .


Maybe more comments on the subject tomorrow .Today in a tank dress, with a black top and dark brown paisley skirt

[Lena]

A nice morning , last nites rain cold things off and wiped away some of the always intense humidity that comes with the heat .As annoying as heat can be humidity is worse since it leaves you feeling so sticky and sets off my allergies.


Karin's car was done at 5 PM................the bill came to $855 which happy to say was covered by her extended warranty . Lucky for us , we can't afford a $ 855 bill for anything now . They even threw in a fee outside car wash .After that we went to the movies, we wanted to see a comedy called TROPIC THUNDER but missed the first 20 minutes so instead saw a unknown movie called TRANSSIBERIAN which was a mystery on a train in Russia .Not a bad movie but sure makes you NOT want to ever go to Russia.............. Back home we drank and talked ................the had sex .


That was the second nice nite at home for us . The crib really is getting to be my favorite new hang out . You could easily say for all the money we spent ( not to mention the unbelievable complications we went thru to get this place ) and mortgage payments we should spend as much time her as possible to get our moneys worth out of being homeowners Having fun at home is something that was new for me , only coming when I met Karin over 4 years ago . Before that I was never home , as I used to joke the street was my home and I loved it . It a began as a act of self preservation ..............nobody in there right mind or even semi-right mind like moi wanted to be around home .


It started early when I was 6 or so back in the hills . I had to escape the loudness and madness of " home sweet home '. We had a small 3 room house and everyone was all crammed together so automatically it was going to be noisy . Am surprised I didn't become deaf because of just living with so many people in a small area. . Then also from someone always having the radio on and someone else having the tv on with both getting louder to drown out each other . Both usually getting louder to drown out the other. Fighting too, in fact what seemed like endless fighting too . If it wasn't my sisters going at each other or me then it was my parents screaming at us always involving swearing & name calling and even hitting which led to more noise since whoever got slapped or punched wud be screeching and crying . My folks too, there fights were as the old timers say 'hellacious ' with louder then loud name calling and hitting . One of my mom's sisters once joined in against my father ............. I've never heard people call each other motherfuckerrs so many times at once in my life.


But clever me wud get out and go play in the woods which became my second home .Looking back I was a Kentucky version of SHEENA OF THE JUNGLE . It was always real quiet there and my sisters never joined me and neither of my folks ever came looking for me . I loved exploring ............discovering ponds , creeks , caves , and this one twisted set of trees that looked like a pretzel . Other times wud lay on my back just looking up thru the giant pine tress at the sky . Also could sit unseen among the trees and bushs in front of our house and spy one everyone which made me feel very clever and smarter then everyone else . Most of the time it was just looking at comings and goings .Everyone seemed to stay indoors alot , I guess they must have enjoyed all the noise & anger . Some not too nice things though ..............like one afternoon when my father was at work ( a rare experience for that lazy weasel ) seeing my mom come back with some goomer on the back of his motorcycle with the two kissing passionately . Or more then once the police coming by looking for my low life father for something . That worthless puke was always in trouble .One time even saw the sheriff take him in handcuffs off to the calaboose and recall how I felt absolutely nothing for him .


Still wud like to go back to Lawrence county and go back into the woods which have gone down in my memory as a friend . Could even find free firewood to use at home now . Karin wud enver go , like most city folks she thinks the hills are full of wild savages like the backwoods types in DELIVERANCE. Thats not true and even if it was we'd be OK since they'd probably be cousins ..............


The tradition of escaping came back when I was a teen-ager when we came to Louisville . This time though having me running around not in the woods but the big bad city . And I had just as much fun but definitely not in as wholesome right out of a old country and western song way as back in the hills . My mom had a 2 story but still a small house with 3 tiny bedrooms and one bathroom . More people too and with that alot more noise.My low life sub human daddy was not around but it was still me and my mom and 3 sisters along with 2 others my mom had with the soldier .. And kids since they all started dropping babys young and in the best tradition of self destructive stupidity in my family kept on having more and more Guys too, my sister Betty had one of her now 3 husbands living there and my mom had 2 bf's living with us , no surprise both cocksuckers like my father .The most people at one point crammed into that dump ( rotting wood, mildew , a always smelly bathroom ) was 11. Noise and then some , the house was noisy 24/7 it seemed . People always up , the tv and now several radios all going at the same time , babys ALWAYS crying, and fights galore .


So moi wud head out to escape . Most of the time I wud go to school in the morning and not come back till later at nite .Sometimes not at all , my mom never once said a thing about it . She didn't care and with the huge mob staying there I don't think she even noticed I wasn't around . Moved in with my first bf at 15 too partly to be with him & partly to have a home that was quieter ! Luckily for me had my cousin/ best friend / soul mate Francie who had the same situation at home to hang around with . Thru her met a posse of other girls from the same back ground , most of whom ended up being like family . We'd do everything and go everywhere and it really was wonderful at the same time having close friends and exploring the whole metro area . We'd be at the big mall downtown , suburban malls , guys places, trying to get served at bars, hanging around Fort Knox to meet soldiers, and even driving around weekends crashing partys all over. Sometimes leaving with souvenirs we found in the parents room like money and jewelry too................


Learned about about the city too, although I hated school it was like a education . Learned how to get around including figuring out short cuts to where you want to go and how to avoid/get over traffic jams . Learned to about all the different parts of the city to which all had each in one way or another there own personalitys .Looking back I didn't know the gang and I had discovered sociology .


Some interesting people . Some bad ................like the good looking & seemingly real nice 20 something guy we met near the 4th Street mall who turned out to be a pimp wanting to recruit us and these older black guys who had HOODLUM written all over them and because of that were exciting to 3 dummys like me , Francie ,and Laquisha . But at there house overheard the guys talk about gang raping us and calling friends over to be part of it so we snuck out the back window .Phew !!! Sad people and people in trouble too , like teen age prostitutes including a pale thin boy who was about 16 doing it for disgusting middle class -middle aged white suburban men who you know were probably all Republicans and claimed to be religous .. Also a pregnant girl doped up out of her mind with needle marks all up and down her left arm , I never want to know what happened to her or the baby . BUT some good if not great people too like a 40 ish minister who ran a shelter for kids who was just so amazingly kind and nice .Then there was this female cop who picked us up for curfew violation but gave us cards for social services for any help we needed . And of all things this army sergeant who looked liked Lou Gossett ( you don't see much of him on tv anymore ) who just to be a decent guy chased off this slime who had been bothering Corvah .


Being out on the street continued after I left my moms at 18 . Was always out at bars and partying . Not making alot of money kept me in cheap places which were never that nice either so you wudn't want to stay home & get depressed so heading out was the best thing to do . My apartments or rooms were never the cozyest places either , I don't have Martha Stewart's touch for home decorating . . Moi is a slob too and wudn't do to good cleaning . One winter day a catsup bottle broke and while I did plan to clean it up later ended up letting it freeze and sit there till spring . No nice furniture either, always used . In fact still have a easy chair I found in some body's garbage .


Anyway am now a homebody , and loving it . Today in a purple polo shirt ( from the hijacked truck sale ) and tan khaki mini . At work tonite at the country club the uniform of a white blouse , Kelly green jumper dress with nude thigh tops & brown flats .

[Lena]

SORRY .............It took several tys to get this post up since there was trouble logging into FF"s forum section .All done now.





Moi had a big adventure last nite ...........................insomnia . Waking up at 3:AM and not being able to get back to sleep .That doesn't happen often and there was no special reason I should have woken up in the middle of the nite since I am not sick or going thru any crisis. Really is frustrating since you just lay there trying to sleep but being unable to do so . Time seems to stand still too, like the evil god of insomnia is trying to torture you . Finally did get back to sleep at about 5AM , maybe a morning nap later.................


Worked at the country club , it was me waitressing with Meghan who I like . Carlene was bartender, love her . She and her new hubby the Sarge had a great honeymoon going out west to see Yellowstone .She seems very happy and content , good for her . Her daughter Rachel is back to Vanderbilt University now , Carlene thinks living with a bf but is pretending not to know . Always interesting gossip fro the rich members .At one of my tables heard some member's talking how a relative lost his shirt when the government took over Freddie Mac the mortgage company . Too bad really , those rich Republicans always howl about how there should be no government regulation so they can make more money but then trouble hits and folks get hurt and in that mans case actually wiped out . Maybe with more regulation though we wudn't have had this huge housing industry crisis ? I had to stop thinking about it since I was getting upset . If this whole gigantic real estate mess ( which looks to be around for a long time ) hadn't happened I wudn't have been carrying around plates of Trout Almondine and Roast Pork to rich people but out making the good money selling houses .............


Back to sunday nite though it was real nice . Carla and Judy came over for dinner and we all had a great time . They were already there when I got home , got held up at work . The talk, laffing , and wine were all flowing Usually I'd change right away getting out of my dress and stockings into something comfy like a T shirt and gym shorts . But the fun pulled me in right away so I didn't change and after a few merlots was very very comfy . Always is nice coming home , all the better when friends and good times were waiting like sunday . Like I wrote yesterday have lived in some dumps like my folks 3 small room house back in the hills , my mom's tiny house here that smelled & was crammed with too many people , and some paces I stayed after leaving home . The worst being at 18 when my gf Donna Maye had 2 rooms in this firetrap of a old wood building with mice galore , having to share the bathroom with our neighbors the Burgens . Who were a drunken old man with a foul mouth and known to when drunk pee on the street & in the lobby and his 2 worthless 20 something sons .The horror storys I could tell about that .............


But our place while small is real nice, hardwood floors and lite brown walls with the wood molding painted white . When you turn the lites off our old crappy second hand furniture looks like antiques.I tell people it's from THE POTTERY BARN'S HISTORIC RETRO COLLECTION Also a gorgeous 6 x 9 ' red oriental rug Karin got as part of the' divorce 'from her old bf ................... Everyone was in the semi dining room thats the area between the living room and kitchen .In honor of there trip to Italy Karin whose a great cook had made Linguine with clam sauce using a recipe from THE BLACK DOG COOK BOOK that we got on our trip to MARTHAS VINEYARD . On the table she even had fresh gladiolas in a old fashioned white pitcher that looked beautiful Karin even had Italian music from the Italian music channel on satellite tv on for atmosphere . As with us even though they were always busy on there vacation the whole experience had given them too a new lease on life.


Carla has new hair or whats really her old hair back . For the last year she had long shoulder length hair, now she' back to a a bob except with no twirl on the sides, just hangs down now . As always Judy had her hair in a bun , she says it's too kinky to be loose. Couldn't get over how chilled they looked and acted . For the longest time have been sexually attracted to Carla although in a rare act of maturity for moi have held off bring up the idea of swapping with them . You can always find someone to sleep with , god friends though come few and far between and we don't want to lose them .Must say now see a sexually exciting side to Judy that is new . .We both noticed how much she looks like Logan , one of the women we had some cheap & superficial as well hedonistic and totally immediate gratification but oh so much fun sex with on vacation . Both have thin jewish faces and black kinky hair although Logan being much much more into glamour & appearance had blond highlights I wonder if Judy also likes having her toes sucked ?


The photos from Italy and also Vienna really lived up to the vibe as being great . They all seemed to capture the time and place as well as there completely happy mood. The city of Florence looks like a giant gorgeous art museum , building a after building looked just so old and beautiful . There photos of the DAVID statue seemed to come to life. That MICHELANGELO really was quite the sculpture . Carla said the statue was so gorgeous she thought of going back to men which had us all booing and saying no no no .......Also loved the one from the side of a covered bridge , can't remember the name . They said it was full of boutiques and classy restaurants . A great one of the 2 of them holding hands looking completely at ease and happy at a big open air food market . Loved the ones of Venice too. Promised myself I'd see the Grand Canal before I die and their picture of little canals between buildings away from all the tourists were just fantastic . The funniest were the ones from Rome . Including of Judy feeding a stick thin black cat at the Colosseum . They told us there were cats all over and the restaurant owners drop left over food of every nite . Karin loved seeing the Vatican city where her pope lives . Although neither are Catholic there Carla& Judy were very happy . I had to laff thinking how to my people being there in pope land wud be like being at the gates of hell . Our friends loved the art work there too describing it as 'unbelievable ' .................


We also found our vacations had something in common ,hee hee . Karin was first to notice how several of the photos from the Adriatic sea included them with 2 other women in there late 20's who turned out to be from Germany .Both very femme with long hair, a brunette named Sarah and a blond named Catharina . They'd met at nude beach and hit it off and after the second day deciding to all have special sexual fun . Carla and Judy were bot shocked but I think very relieved to learn there not the only ones doing that as part of the vacation . Carla's mouth dropping open followed by a loud OMG when Karin blurted out " She's had me f*cking men for years ............ .." . After some confusion/shock but also a huge round of laffter both were happy to also learn we have also included other women in our lascivious adventures ................. Leading to more juicey talk about the meaty issue of decadence for decadence sake sport f*cking .Got nervous / bored ( I wanted to hear about pure lust driven orgiastic S-E-X ) when talk shifted to the ethics of it all . Something that had to happen with a guilt ridden moralistic Catholic like Karin and a intense questioning jewish intellectual like Judy . But with moi bringing it all back down to earth talking about all the fun the actual experiences were ................... We may not be known for our brains but you can count on us hillbillys to keep it real....................


Today back to the hotel . Lia Minnelli stayed there while I was off and she's legend in show business and also the the hotel industry since she can be difficult if not insane .looking forward to hearing any gossip about her . Interested too in learning how front desk manager April is doing as acting general manager .


Today in my second hand pink Lacoste polo shirt dress and at work the penguin suit and orthies .

[Lena]

Rain all day ........................ It always makes me feel better and smarter . Maybe I should live in the shower ?


Forgot to mention in yesterdays post about some of the other fun we had sunday when our friends were over.Nothing debauched ( although do think sex with either Carla or Judy wud be fun ) but some good talk on what you get from travelling including but going beyond sport f*cking with strangers Along with that seeing other places and for same strange reason I can't explain but understand how you come home understanding more about where you stay . Also some crazy dancing for awhile . To go with her Italian food and there pictures of Italy Karin had the Italian channel on tv and they played a lively old song called RENATO that made you want to dance . We all liked it and checked on YouTube and sure enough found a video of it probably from the early 1960's or 1950's .It had all these Italians dancing around doing what Judy thought was a version of the twist but wit there arms stretched out to the side . We were all soon dancing around . There were some other twist type songs next to it , including this hysterical instrumental called LECON TWIST with a dancer who looked a lot like Shelby Medlock who's a soft butch we all know . We all danced along with that and a another till Baily from next dor came by and real nice ( almost embarrassed like) asked us to turn the music down . The music was retro and simple that many wud laff at .But it was also F-U-N !!!!! Moi's always very proud to brag how she doesn't care about being cutting edge or cool...............


It was hard getting yesterdays post up . For some reason I couldn't get into the FORUM section here. I had no trouble getting in everywhere else but not here . So after trying and tying long along with getting more and more frustrated I just quit and took a nap .Life is too short to sit all angry in front of a monitor waiting for the machine to decide to work ............... Happily later was able to get back in and share my brilliance with all of you ................


Not much to say this morning. Nothing interesting happened and nothing really happened that has the potential to try to make interesting .Yawn . Before work picked up our dvd recorder that had been in for repairs.Don't understand PANASONIC'S way of doing business ,our dvd recorder broke but was still under warranty so we didn't have to pay . We paid $225 for it brand new but when I picked it up yesterday the repair bill was $278 so it wud have been cheaper for PANASONIC just to give us a new one .


Just before going into work put my Dr .Scholls on which has been almost a ritual this summer since I've been going barefoot so much .Except of course when we were in those big east coast citys where it really wudn't have been too smart to do that . Putting on shoes is today's version of when I was still smoking and wud wait till I got to the door to throw away my cigarette . Someday have to do a post about how good it feels NOT to be a smoker anymore . Ate in the re-opened employee cafeteria which seems a little better , the room is cleaner and the food looks better.But moi has complete faith in the abilitys of the staff down there helped by managements lack of interest to turn it back into a rat infested sewer before long .................. Wore the penguin suit .


Did ask my friends in security if anything happened when the insane Liza Minnelli stayed with us . She's a wild one , last year or the year before she even attacked a the maid at the companys hotel in Atlanta and have seen stuff on tv like her ex husband suing her for beating him up and even her chauffeur suing her for beating him up and making him sex her. But security heard /saw nothing except she always wanted escorts and doted on this minature dog talking to it in baby talk . My friends in Housekeeping had more saying she drank the complimentary bar in her suite almost dry over 2 days .


Texts and e-mails galore today . Nice to be so popular..................... My best friend the slightly psycho Leslie wants to get together , maybe get one last swim in at the below ground pool at her ex's . Naturally that includes drinking and /or geting high too. Cousin Francie up north says she's lost 45 pounds on JENNY CRAIG which is great , she was such a hottie but the weight came with the babys and she got big . Now she's heraded back to being the bombshell she was .Also they went on vacation to some chain of lakes in Wisconsin which the kids and her hubby Luke loved . And of all people Marla who as your regulars know is a old friend married to my boss but there having trouble . She apologized for being rude last week and wants to talk I really do want to help her and Brendan solve whatever is the problem between them .


More errands today ........................they never end . Another dress, don't wear this one often for some unknown reason . A square front with thats black with a red & yellow floral pattern with the hem about 2 -3 inches above the knee. At work tonite the penguin suit & ortheies again .

[Lena]

The rain is coming down in buckets and I couldn't he happier. Earlier this morning I was curled up on the couch with coffee watching , really savoring it . I feel so at ease


Karins's not home yet , had to stay for a in-service training program . Wud be fun to have sex since I've always liked doing it during the rain . Definitely the next time !!!! The rain's not affecting the cats at all, there morning routine stays the same .Talk about being grounded ! Agatha is on one of the chairs in the living room giving herself the usual morning bath while Fritz is on the ledge looking out at what going on the street .I hear Steve upstairs lumbering around , although it's not as loud as before. He's been on a big diet and has lost alot of weight so it's not like having a dinosaur or elephant moving around upstairs anymore. Lucky us , Karin got a text from her cousin Cate who wants to come over and do wash this week-end . Cates the disturbed 20 year old who is from a pretty well-off family but is committed to being street scum............. Moi wants to be ehre when she comes by to make sure she doesn't steal or talks Karin into giving her some of our money . I love my gf to death but she's a too much of a soft touch .


Work was pretty much the same old same old last nite . In the new and improved for now rat free employee cafeteria learned some big VP from corporate has been staying at the hotel for a few days . My friend Rosalind whose a manager telling me how the other mangers think he's here to check up on how her boss front Desk manager April is doing as acting general manger or to step in if she can't handle it . Don't think they'd ever do that with a man I even saw his ' holiness ' in the lobby , a tall good looking guy about 45-50 . Ass't Concierge and management worshipping slut/informer Barb Stuart was falling all over him , practically licking the man .


Wore the penguin suit and in the bar had cocktail waitress Narla with me . She's great , very funny and free wheeling . She's no hostile loudmouth but does indeed still have a sharp tongue when she wants that always has moi laffing with her comments and responses to the customers as well as when we talk about things .Bob in security stopped by , no big news . As it stands now I'm meeting him and his fiance Miss Julia ( sounds so southern doesn't it , but she's a yankee from north Indiana ) for lunch next Wednesday to see there vacation photos . They spent mid august in Paris France which is a place I'd love to go someday .


I stayed up for a hour or so after getting home from work . Naturally enough since it was the anniversary of 9/11there was alot on tv about it . Even though it was interesting it was also depressing so had to turn it off. No disrespect to the dead and there people but with my tendency to get depressed ( but not as much as before ) didn't want to risk falling into a deep funk .Not much else on , every HBO movie looks like the other and no one interesting as any of the late nite talk shows . But did see the ABC new interview with Sarah Palin who am proud to say lived up to moi's perception of her ......... . Have all the years in therapy and times in psych wards left me with the gift of deep psychological insight ?


If the whole purpose of the interview was to get Americans to know and like her with many it had to fail . To me she came of as basically a opinionated performer and I repeat performer who was trying to show off by trying to be glib and in command of herself . The interviewer caught her too not knowing about some bush administration stuff and you could tell she was surprised and trying to BS her way out of answering for fear of being wrong . To my shock she said if we have to should go to war against Russia to protect some place called Georgia where neither I and am sure 99% of all Americans could point to on a map. The woman is definitely NOT ready to be Vice President at all and heaven help us all if she ever had to take over...............


Am going to wait till Karin gets home then go for a big walk in the rain . Work will be busy tonite . I first do the Concierge Lounge then with Cassady Norm do a big reception . Wierd Norm is taking care of the bar .


Heading out in my loden green army style dress and at work tonite the black cocktail waitress dress , nude garter stockings & black flats .

[Lena]

Will try to post later, no real time today .

Moi had a big adventure at work last nite .I went in expecting to bartend but ended up MOD or the daily manager who makes sure the hotel keeps running.IT wasn't planned either , the scheduled MOD didn't show up since she was sick and the acting general manager was hosting a local general managers meeting .So they picked me , a humble hourly rated employee.

Was quite the wild ride, I feel like I was riding a tiger. But they thought I did a good job .


Am not CINDERELLA tonite , back to bar tending which is fine .Heading out in a black tank top and jean mini /At work the black cocktail waitress dress, nude stockings ,and black flats

[Guest]

Sara Palen has as much if not more experience as your beloved Obama. He also has ZERO international experience. Neither did Bill Clinton or Ronald Regan! And how can you support someone who had as one of his mentors a confirmed domestic unrepentant terrorist who bombed government buildings in the 60's? If Obama is elected, it will be because of uninformed people like you. And if you want your taxes raised, he's your man. Ooops, sorry, you probably don't pay any!

[Lena]

Sara Palen has as much if not more experience as your beloved Obama. He also has ZERO international experience. Neither did Bill Clinton or Ronald Regan! And how can you support someone who had as one of his mentors a confirmed domestic unrepentant terrorist who bombed government buildings in the 60's? If Obama is elected, it will be because of uninformed people like you. And if you want your taxes raised, he's your man. Ooops, sorry, you probably don't pay any!

Ouch .....................

[Lena]

Finally time to post ..................been a busy morning with too many phone calls .


Yesterday was pretty nice for more reasons then one . Went for a long walk in the rain which I loved .Stopped to make a imprint of my foot in the mud and only seconds after I left  a truck drove by giving the people who were coming by a second bath for the day . Phew  . Had a good cup of coffee at the coffee boutique , even getting some much appreciated leers from some yuppy guys in for a early lunch .


Getting into work assumed it wud be another day bartending but it wasn't to be . After getting into the black cocktail waitress dress while in the employee cafeteria the chef motioned for me to come over and said April the acting general manager wanted to see me . Oh dear I thought as a slight sense of guilt based angst hit, did  she find out I drink on the job and steal pens and toiletries so I was going to be fired ? Or somebody tell a lie about me and she fell for it ? So after putting my tray back ( thinking maybe for the last time ) reported to April who was with the corporate VP whose been at the hotel for the last few days .


Both were  nice enough , April smiles setting me at ease and asks " Ever want to be the MOD ? " ( manger of the day ) and I laffed making a stupid joke , to me that wud be like being a general manager or for that matter corporate VP . We hourlys never  ever get that high , ever...............! But April didn't laff back but while still smiling said there was a emergency  since the scheduled MOD couldn't make it in and it was to late to get another manager and they needed someone whose been at the hotel long enough to know how things work to be MOD that nite . I was almost in shock , feeling like I was in one of those old movies where a girl from the chorus gets to take over for the star . I said am  only a bartender who knows the bar and am no manager but April was more confident about me then me saying she thinks I could handle it all . The corporate VP  saying I came highly recommended ( April ? ) and he 's seen many cases where non management staff step in and do great .....................so after taking a deep breaths aid I wud give it my best shot . Both seemed real pleased and happy , that felt good . Also strange in a way since while everyone in the hotel business smiles all the time you often run into assholes who only care about themselves and hate the world  . 


My day as MOD began with being suited up . Couldn't work in the cocktail waitress dress ,  although do think many ( especially male ) guests wud have liked dealing with a woman  looking like a femme fatale The lady  in uniforms dropped everything to find me the standard navy blue skirt suit uniform along with the red/black/yellow  striped blouse that  goes with it .For the first time in 10 years working in hotels wished I was in heels  or at least kitten heels  .I hated having to wear them as a cocktail waitress but yesterday they wud have been good  since my  flats looked a little too informal with the uniform .But was glad I was at least wearing undies which as regular readers know is not always the case with moi .............. Then got my radio phone from security and master access card letting me get into about everywhere in the hotel .


Being very clear April filled me in on what I had to do , starting with the attitude I am the face of the hotel to the guests and management to the staff . Awesome responsibilities really .Me a convicted felon the face of the company to the guests, what wud the suits at top say about that ? Also me whose broken about every company rule possible as the face of management to the staff         She gave me a big list too of all the big and little things a MOD is supposed to do . really was looooong too  . Then being the wonderful person and boss she was she took me around to the front desk , engineering , security ,and banquet and kitchen letting them all know I was the MOD . Then in less then a hour after she first told me I wud be MOD she and the corporate VP were off to a meeting of area general mangers an moi was on her own ................


I always thought being the boss meant you had unlimited power and could do what you want . Not the case, there's also conquering your fear about doing the job and then seeing how it's all about how well you deal with what comes your way .At fist  I really did feel like a helpless idiot standing there , almost like a scarecrow in a field . I may have looked like a MOD but inside was a lamb waiting for the slaughter . My legs began to twitch and like when I'm so nervous wud slip in  and out of my shoes. All I could think about was how could I possibly manage to do the  job ?


All of a sudden there was no time to be angst ridden since things were happening that needed taking care off then and now . Some guest appeared out of nowhere anting information about how to book a tour for the city . That was easy , took them over to the Concierge desk for help . Along with getting very a nasty glare from ass't Concierge Barb Stuart  a management wanna -be whose never liked me . You could tell  she was jealous and angry , I bet that she was even thinking " You can put lipstick on a pig but it's still a pig " ..............  Then just as I'm saying good-bye to the guest got a cal to go to the loading dock to sign for a delivery . In this case 40 new  mattresses and box springs . The driver needed help and both guys in shipping were slated to go and the hotel doesn't like paying overtime . But was able to talk them into staying then came up with the idea of asking the kitchen if we could borrow a few of the Mexicans from the dish room and they went along . In less then a hour everything was off loaded and in storage .


Back at my MOD Desk in the lobby felt much more relieved but still scared . As I sat smiling at at the desk my feet nervously went in and out of my shoes and my legs almost uncontrollably swung back and forth . Soon there was a TWANG and noticed how a garter had snapped . Re-snapping a garter in the bar can be fun and brings in extra tips  But a MOD even acting MOD can't do that so to avoid putting on a peep show struggled to re-snap it under the table , not easy ! Soon back to dealing with guests , more people  wanting  info on tours , a army colonel  who needed a limo  the next day for DOD big shot, a man needing directions to Churchill Downs . Staff trouble too , Jesse the bellman whose 19 going on 14 was against the rules sitting on a couch in the lobby not standing at the bell stand . I went over feeling my leg to make sure my stockings as strapped in since a drooping nylon wud have made me a huge joke ) and motioned for him to stand up , all the time smiling to be nice. Don't want to be a dictator. But Jesse just smiled back and kept sitting . so went over and in a low voice told him he knows he can't be sitting and get back to the bell stand before someone  says something . He just stares at me saying ' For real ?" I nod and say more forcefully '"Yes and right now please" so Jesse shakes his head and gets up .Think he muttered something about power going to my head but was back at the bell stand where he belonged . That was annoying but good, at that point decided I am the boss an they have to listen .If other women at work like April and Rosalind can manage so can I . Even thought of FA and Vera here, they have responsibilities and they do them so I will do mine !


As the nite went on it got busyer and busyer .Sometimes involving talking to guests , that can be fun hearing where there from and how they like the old town . There was a 70 something retired newspaper sports writer who told me he'd come here to cover this young fighter named Cassius Clay . But sometimes annoying too , got my ear chewed of by one guy telling me how great MARRIOTT hotels are , didn't tell him they fired me for being so bad as to get sick and need medical leave which is the law. Also this one huge fat man who was going on and on like I was his best friend then suddenly turned and walked away like I was nothing . Running around and then some . Had to meet the engineers -to check out a water leak in the basement , they spent most of the shift patching it up . Then up to the Grande Ballroom to meet with a man at a reception there who wanted to have party . So real quick zoomed down to Sales to get Bernie the Sales manager's card and also got the man's card for Bernie .Even showed him our kitchen . No sooner then I finished with him this very very stylish but pushy 40 something woman wanted to know about having a party too so again had to get her card and run back down to sales to get another of Bernie's cards.This time I took 6 of them so if anyone else wanted info I wudn't have to run to the office again . It was really getting annoying ! BTW Cassady was working the party and said hi but looked shocked moi wud be MOD . As always new shoes , last nite gold platform sandals .


Walked around to checking to see if everything was clean and nothing was damaged .In the lobby some guys had moved chairs all around and they needed putting back the way they were.So just to get it done 5'3" 130 pound moi pushed them all back in place, getting cheers from some army guys just checking in . Trouble at the front desk too, some guest who had stayed the nite before but had not told us they'd be staying another nite had been locked out and were really angry . I apologized left and right , haven't said "I'm sorry " so much since I was in front of the judge for drunk driving at 19 . Comped them for the nite and real quick went to the employee cafeteria to tell the maid Virginia Winters she had a emergency needing to fix a room up ASAP. She's about 45 but looks 65 hates me too in part for helping to get her daughter Jill fired , actually stupid & angry Jill got herself fired by making a issue of me serving her underage bf . Like Jesse the bellman she didn't want to do what she was told and gave me a dirty look on top of it all . I just came out and told her how she had to clean the room and if she didn't get moving now I'd have to tell James Brown whose the Housekeeping manager ( and yes thats his real name . ) so old Virginia still giving me a look that could kill got up and went to do it . What a miserable angry old hag ................


MO' s are required to visit every department at one point so moi set out to do that . Went by the Gift Shop ....all was well. Leon the doorman was having a good night too, but hadn't seen my favorite customer Mr . Dyson come on .Leon loves him too since Mr. Dyson gives good tips for Leon to park whatever vintage car he's driving . I really wanted him to see me being manager .Checked o Phil and Danny on in engineering , they had the water leak under control .Then had to rush back to the front desk to help some people who were checking in with 2 dogs . They needed pens complete with cushions for the doggies Had to get them from storage . Luckily had one of the Mexicans to help me carry them . Manager trainee Lauren was handling the desk and she and the crew were doing great . We both agreed it was our nite to shine . Then back to the walk -thru . Next were the kitchen ( always a beehive of activity ) talking to chef Harry who is gorgeous but oh so gay ( ) and security where I caught security Mel watching porn on the computer.Told him no no and he laffed turning it off . But while he had turned it off saying he wudn't do that anymore am 110% sure the minute the door hit my booty he was back at pouty lips.com . But ignored it since I have friends in security and can't be a hypocrite , I log into FF from work so couldn't come down on anyone for playing on the machine at work.


More running and more running around. Complaints started flooding in about room service orders not making it to the rooms . No surprise, Carlo the waiter was all caught up in watching a baseball game instead of doing his job . I told him to get on it , he said not to bother him and he'd get to the room deliveries after the end of the inning . I bluntly told him he had to get on it now or I'd suspend him on the spot and do the deliveries myself ! . At that point he was indeed shocked and got up to do what he's paid for as if it was some big imposition . Like Virginia Winters and Jesse the bellman he too didn't like it , even mumbled something about me but in spainish . I did write him up too geting in his whole nasty attitude . No not doa youro jobo and thinko you canno insulto the chica gringa jefffette and geto awayo witho ito !


After that was on my way up to the lobby when I got a cal from Leon the doorman telling me 'the eagle has landed ' which meant Mr. Dyson was here. Very excited I went to the lobby hoping to accidentally run into him and it worked .He was with a friend whose been in before, this also rugged looking senior with thick white hair and a lean leathery body . Mr.Dyson smiled seeing me in the uniform . Moi said hello then he said " I see the finally had the sense to make you a manager " and I blushed like a little girl . His rough looking friend adding " Hey Dick does that mean we get to drink for free ? '" and we all laffed . I'd have probably asked the same thing if I was him . But just as I was explaining how I got to be MOD the front desk called with a another problem . They understood, you know they were the kind of guys in there younger years who called the shots knowing all about when duty calls .


The big crisis now as 40 something guest in town for the big bar mitzvah tonite who needed emergency dental work .The poor man was in tremendous pain from a tooth ache . So real quick got the name of the emergency dentist, called to make sure he was there then got the money from petty cash for them to take a cab over there. Even gave them the hotel number to call so we'd send the limo to pick them up .They were soon off then thought how I should have also given them my name or someone else's name to call to make sure they'd be picked up .So now panniced real quick ran with the nite managers card and my name on one of Bernies cards ( now very happy I'd taken so many of his cards to chase them down .Lost both shoes in the hallway catching up to them just as Leon the doorman was putting them into a cab . After finding my shoes made a note to tell the nite manager .Wud hate to have those people stranded ..........


Nothing really big happened later .Went by the bar , wierd Norm was whining about having worked so hard . Fat chance he'd ever do that ! I asked him about last saturday with the big group that came in with the selfish guy who tryed hijacking his daughter's wedding to perform and he got upset . Like I thought they wud those yahoos kept him moving , didn't tip ,and security had to come at closing to get them out . Jamie the selfish guy too no surprise disappeared when the bill came ..............


With all the paperwork I didn't get out of the hotel till 2AM and was very very tired.At 8:05 AM this morning tough April called being very happy how she'd heard I'd done "a kick ass job " ............... Am getting $ 100 bonus and get to come in later today as a reward .

[Lena]

Although Texas is a loooong loooong way away we've some rain from Hurricane Ike .They say it will taper of today but moi hopes it sticks around . Rain adds alot of character to daily life............


Moi enjoyed her extra free time yesterday , didn't do much but anything beats being at work . Mostly posted and sent e-mails .At work wore the black cocktail waitress dress and with Rafael and worked a almost 200 person wedding last nite . Nothing stood out, no flamboyant selfish asshole like Jamie last week Just busy , both of us were happy when the bar closed during diner since it meant relief from the huge mob always wanting drinks .


Rafael said he'd heard of my showing as MOD and wasn't surprised saying he knew I could handle it . That was real good to hear . He also teased me asking if I was going to go to college to get a degree in hotel administration and what a company person I am underneath . Nope to both , don't think I could handle college ( although sex in the library like we'd have when Karin was in school and all those wild parties sound right up my alley ) and the idea of being a company person is about as appealing as being a Sarah Palin fan


More more reaction to me being MOD . All good ,even when it involved dissing me and lying .For a second talked to April whose acting general manager who hugged me saying how good it went and how the VP from corporate felt that way too Maybe he can order my base pay raised by $10 or $15 extra per hour ? No , shouldn't expect that much . Derick too my friend insecurity hugged me saying how he'd heard from Bob and others how I'd done alright . Even gossiping ( the first time I ever heard him repeat what someone said ) how Arnold Haynes the wiseacre on midnites in security said I was on top of everything . We both marvelled that Arnold wud have anything good to say about anyone Saw Lauren too who had been running the front desk and she said they liked me and also her .She's walking on air . I'm happy for her since hotels are her career and she's getting off to a great start .


No surprise a few bitter critics who didn't' t let truth get in the way of dissing me . My spys told me how in the employee cafeteria ass't Concierge Barb Stuart whose the management wanna be , Virginia Winters the maid , and Ronnie a banquet captain were all trash talking me . According to them I was everything from the slave driver /dictator , ego tripping , coming on to army guys , and in a panic .The last was true but did hide it and found as the nite went on the best way to escape anxiety is to just jump into the pond . Barb is said to ave claimed that all her 'manger friends ' that exist only in her mind thought I did a terrible job and should be fired.Then adding how I may be unless ' Lena does her usual number and sleeps with someone high up " . .............what a nice woman ! But none of that was true and they were all jealous . can't wait to hear what Carlo the lazy room service waiter has to say about me writing him up for watching a baseball game instead of doing his job .He'll probably accuse me of racism against Hispanics or something like being a terrorist


Karin's reaction made me pretty happy . When I told her about it she was very happy and proud .But best of all said she always figured I could do something like that after dealing with the bar for all these years . And telling me for what must be the jillionth time if I made it thru growing up in the wild West End with all the crime and insanity I can do anything .................


Taking it easy now . No tv, no radio just moi here by the machine .Soon will move into the living room and with a cup of coffee watch the rain . The cats were funny this morning . When I came out of the bedroom both were at opposite ends of the couch in the same exact position , curled up in balls like matching bookends . I hear Steve and Miss Dolores upstairs now doing something sinful too Or maybe she stubbed her toe and is moaning from pain . I 'll know for sure soon since when they finish a very happy Steve lets with with something like "Touchdown !!! " or "Yeeeeha!!! "


Today's plans are work then home to chill . We get some quality together tonite . heading out in white polo shirt and tan khaki mini and my big red rain poncho .At the country club there uniform of a Kelly green jumper dress, white blouse with nude garter stockings ( now drying on the shower rail ) and brown flats ......................

[Lena]

Yesterday had it's surprises.But then again life is full of surprises and on the good side even when bad they do keep things from getting too routine & boring .


First got to the country club and everything was fine but then the dining hall manager Dave called us all into the kitchen for a meeting . In these times that got me scared , I was thinking there'd been another big terrorist attacks or something had happened to one of the presidential candidates. But luckily no , seems the basement of the club house was flooded .Coming from rain caused by the Hurricane Ike , I saw on CNN how it caused rain storms all the way from the Gulf of Mexico to the Canadian border .The hot water was out and the water was actually over the electric outlet making the basement a giant electric pond .Wonder if any rats or other varmints like possums and racoon's who get in down there got electrocuted <BUZZ> ......................


So they decided to shut the place down . We all got paid for our schedules shift which was fine but we all missed out on tips . Hoping for extra money moi offered to stay to tell any members who wud show up the place was closed but Dave said no , he was going to fall on the sword and do that . So after griping about missing out on money shifted gears and got into the holiday spirit . It was funny seeing everyone's response to the unexpected day off. Carlene the bartender was hoping to catch the afternoon service at this mega church she's interested in joining but said her new hubby the retired sergeant wud probably ant to stay home to watch sports , May Wah back for the first time said nothing but was smiling from ear to ear which for her could mean being happy about extra time to study or maybe meeting a guy while Meghan was almost giddy calling her bf on the phone to get together I hope for some meaningful communication or knock down drag out passion ......... . I think in under 2 minutes all of us were in and out of the locker room changing wasting NO time in escaping & getting out to have fun . Charlie Brown the chef had to stay awhile longer to close down the kitchen but was happy too, hoping to get in some fishing ...........


Back home Karin was sound asleep from working midnites so I went on the machine . A e-mail from Marla about meeting lunch , despite my history of colossal history failure in relationships except this one of course ( ) want to help her and Brendan patch things up ........we meet tuesday .Another from Leslie ,wants me over monday but I can't .That's my day with Karin .Les is back in school and already has a crush on her male social science professor .Baby Grady started school too is now in first grade . Time flys , seems like just yesterday he was baby ( or in old fashioned southern a 'sucker' ) and I was holding him in one arm .He's also playing soccer so have to make it to one of his games .Also notice from a local gay site about a get together , worth going just to meet new people .


The big thing which could also be called the stupidest thing was the troll attack here. I've seen them before, just fools coming on making real dumb or mean posts . What a waste of time . Also punk , if you want to be really vicious and make trouble do something really bad like bust out car or store windows not be a baby and go on the www typing nonsense ! In my old neighborhood those guys wud have been written of as 'hos.The way those doughballs went after karrin had me wondering of it wasn't really that freak rezzarix aka land of moo moo, black vapor, and flutterheart . What a wasted life...................


Soon decided to take a nap which was a good idea. I needed it . Karin actually woke me up about 6PM and we took a shower together then after a lite dinner of fish & rice watched tv . We saw a depressing but good movie called RENDITION about spys & terrorists then for about the the jillionth time THE WEDDING CRASHERS which is always funny .


Today we're driving a hour from town to see Karin's sister Diane whose in her 8th month . They know it'll be a boy so that macho wanna be hubby of hers has on his own already decided the boys name will be macho NICK , not Nicholas just plain NICK ! I bet he'll get a assault rifle for his first birthday too. Moi's in a tank dress, white top with lite blue and white skirt .

[Lena]

I feel like I am in a soap opera , don't know if it's still on but there used to be a soap called AS THE WORLD TURNS .Maybe I could call this all AS THE STOMACH CHURNS or AS THE ROAD KILL POSSUM CHURNS. The good thing though is my life is fine .........at least for now .


Seeing too much of other peoples troubles but think I've come up with a good way to deal with it all.Namely by doing what I can to help but not get too caught up/over-involved with them .The big danger in trying to help others is you can real easily tear yourself down in the process. It happened at 19 when I half-crazy put alot of effort into a failed try at stopping my then gf Donna Maye become a junkie .Also don't want to be one of those people who feel good about themself looking at other's problems . or ego tripping by trying to save folks from themselves............


Part of it involves the ongoing , never ending ( until he kills her during one of his angry outbursts ) sag of Karin's sister Diane and her fool of a husband Matt . Yesterday we went a hour out of town to see Diane whose 8 months preggers . Karin is real excited , moi even was too . Diane has a beautiful glow and we both laffed hearing the always smiling & cheerful Diane blurt out " I want to get this f*cking thing over with " and finally drop the baby . We both thought about motherhood ourselves .For moi the choice is in vitro or some super smart yuppy from a bar like Lonnie did One wud definitely be more fun then the other, guess which one that wud be ..........................


But those two have always had problems and Karin found the best way to deal with them is to ignore as much as possible . Diane may be 21 but mentally is about 16 .The real issue is Matt whose even more immature , angry , violent , domineering , and a bully .He's already hit her and has a long record of cheating . Diane nae thinks the baby will make things better but she's probably wrong . There's no hope for Matt's kind . Even though she's preggars he isn't helping around the house , still insists the place be spotless, and she always has to make daily fresh baked goods . Lately he's been all caught up in practicing for the mid south regional quick draw competition . ......................pitiful , just pitiful


It's not going to be pretty . Or easy for my gf's family , especially Diane . Matt's already announced he won't be changing diapers and how the baby boy will be named Nick which sounds so macho .I''m only surprised he didn't pick a name like COLT or M-16 for the boy.............Moi will watch , keep her mouth shut to all but Karin even then keeping it short and try not to think about it .


Later today meet with Marla a old friend and one of my heroes to try to help her and Brendan make it thru there rough patch . I really do hope I can do something . We go back a long time to when Marla and I where cocktail waitresses and Brendan was bartender at the MARRIOTT. We had some great times there in the bar and partying after words. I always wanted the kind of relationship they had , where they enjoyed each other and had this respect & trust .Do hope I can help since I wud hate to see them break up . Especially now because kids are involved .If they break-up I hope to not get too depressed and work out some post divorce, post family friendship relationship with both if it's possible ...............


Dealing with all this got clearer last nite when we were at Tinks , the big girl bar here. And the same place where my stupidity ( having sex with a leather girl ) set off our own soap opera a few months back . No surprise it was the first time we were there together since the famous nite The place was slow , saw a few friends and acquaintances . Including Madge McKeithen whose one of my friend Leslie's ex's and still interested .More on that in the next few days , it's funny But as I sat there it came to me mainly because of my drunken stupidity in the bathroom with Monica we had a pretty serious crisis too. If we had broken up am scared I'd be a wreck by now .


In the and leaving me with the big conclusion we all have trouble , best to sympathize when others are up the creek and most of all be happy when nothing bad is going on in your life !!! And as I thought about my loss of senses that nite best to avoid getting yourself into messes since nobody needs them !


Am meeting Marla for lunch and dressing up .She'll be dressed up too since she's a executive now and it goes with the seriousness of the subject . Some how trying to save a marriage and showing up in a T shirt and short shorts don't go together. So my black army style dress from Kentucky's very own JPETERMAN . has a button up front , button down pockets , and a belt . Along with suntan pantyhose and black heels .Even accessorizing with gold chain Wish me luck mediatoring ! Something pretty good and important is at stake .


After that work at the country club in the bar since Carlenes has the nite off.

[Lena]

Am feeling more grown up today but fighting it . Hope I can resist today but do know you can't and also shouldn't want to hide from growing up . I've seen how staying a kid can ruin your life .


I was with Marla for about 2 hours yesterday at a Chili's or TGIF's ( they both seem the same to me ) talking about her and Brendan . Very depressing and also very frustrating ..Things are very bad between them which makes me sad and realizing I can't do much of anything to help had me feeling worthless, as if your watching your house burn down and can't do a thing about it .


Things started out nice enough .Marla was there when I arrived , looked nice in a gray pant suit and cherry blouse . She laffed seeing me in heels , saying how this was the first time she's seen me wearing them since we were cocktail waitresses together at MARRIOTT.Oh the good old days ............... Asked about our vacation and said how Brendan had told her how they thought I'd done a good job as MOD .But once we started to talk about 'the issue ' her face got so depressed . From what Marla said they both feel trapped in the marriage and it isn't fun anymore.It all started with Brendan complaining about all the pressure he's under at home & work and not having any money or free time . A -email from a old friend talking about his wild and carefree bachelor existence sounds like it made it worse. Marla to said it wasn't long before she felt the same way .


Complicated too , while I was real mad at Brendan for messing around with Carita a chef at work and now I learn other women ( including that hideous Barb Stuart the ass't Concierge ) Marla also had a affair .At present she's at there old farm and he's staying at the empty house of a friend of there's mother who just died .Marla went on how she has other problems , they lost power because of the storm so she and the kids had to stay to her folks .But that was rough since her dad is recovering from a stroke and needs peace and quiet .


It all ended with me saying anytime she wants to talk I'll be there and if she wants time alone I 'll watch the children's .She laffed at that , maybe recalling the incredibly wild and irresponsible 19 year old Lena she used to know . That hurt a little but I can't blame her . That was indeed moi .Then smiled and said thanx she wud take me up on my offer. Then she had to get back for a few more hours work at the office while moi had to get to the country club .


Carlene was off so I bartended . The lounge was slow to dead .The director the Colonel saying many members probably think the place is closed since they had to emergency shut down the sunday dinner because of flooding in the basement .But there the bar and dining hall were open for business and empty ............ The basement flooding has turned into a general crisis for the country club . Sounded real complicated, they had 2 feet of water that had to be drained then all the ruined stuff down there had to be removed and hauled away ASAP .After all rich people don't want a pile of garbage laying a round the classy club they paid a fortune to join .But the situation was worse , they found the basement is covered with mold which the law says you have to get rid off since it causes illnesses . Some big cracks too that let the water in need patching up too. The poor Colonel , bet the 1991 war with Iraq was easier for him then this mess.


Only a few people in the bar . All they talked about was basement flooding and of course the economic crisis here . Sunday I over heard a man say how he knew someone who lost there shirt when Freddie Mac failed and last nite another man say in almost total disbelief how for decades his family had dealt with Lehman brothers and now it's gone Meghan waitressing in the dining hall came in for a drink , she was very excited . Thinks bf may soon be asking for her hand ..............


I got home about 11;PM or 2330Euro time and layed back on the couch with a merlot thinking how bad it s for Marla and Brendan but I've done all I can to help . Anymore effort on my part to mediate wud be useless.Did laff at how I enjoyed dressing up , should do that more since it was fun .I still hate heels but TBH yesterday wearing them wasn't all that bad . Of course being in them for 4 hours & sitting down ( with my shoes off under the table most of the time ) a big part of that time was much different from standing in them for 9 hours like when I was a cocktail waitress . Maybe it'd be a good idea to start dressing up one day a week for fun . Since fall is coming I can wear clothes from THE MARILYN KING COLLECTION


Like I wrote am feeling ,ore mature but coming from long line of idiots feel the need to fight it . I probably should wear something like one of the Lacoste dresses complete with jewelry and stockings or go for that relaxed rich woman look in a polo shirt and tan slacks But instead a little wild /sleazy : a navy blue top that has short sleeves and a oval neck top along with a mini from THE MARILYN KING COLLECTION . Barefoot too except for going into the post office and work .That's white with large parallel red , navy blue , and yellow stripes . At the hotel tonite the black cocktail waitress dress, nude garter stockings , and black flats .

[Lena]

Is there a mental condition where you are half teen-ager and also half -adult ? If so am sure I have it . Maybe call OPRAH to do a show about it ?


The kid part was going out in what was already a mini I had shortened further and mainly barefoot .Like millions I love going barefoot for the comfort and feeling of freedom . Also since I am such a colossal attention getter and it does get you looks , mainly from guys . I swear most men out there are either foot fetishists or right away have this fantasy that your barefoot since it's part of undressing to go to bed with them Even went into the post office that way to mail our bills then later to the coffee boutique to have a drink ( it's a better alternative to the past of drinking alcohol at home or going to bars ) and great for people watching .


The big part of me also fawned all this old black dog that was just so warm and loveable . Designer dogs like Akita's and Airedales are nice but you can give me a old mixed breed mutt any day . Like the dog yesterday ( whose name was Shiloh ) do believe there smarter and are more loving . I think I held up the owner from leaving by petting & talking to Shiloh so much . In my car I imagined the man arriving late saying how he'd been held up by a short thin woman who looked like a hooker with a giant tattoo on her left shoulder and a shorter then short skirt who was doting on his dog..............


But almost like a miracle when I got to work became a adult which is more then too many of the people who work there do . so many being caught up in childish games like gossiping & messing around . The symbolical transition comes when I put the flip flops to go on since moi's been warned more then once about coming in barefoot. It's just easier not to fight & do what they want Saw my friend Capt'n Tom who was great , he was real nice about me being MOD last week . When he hugged me saying I was the next LEONA HELMSLEY who may have been a huge bitch but is a legend in the hotel business . I laffed at that , saying too how if I ever got that rich I wud sure never end up in prison like she did. Christophe the army guy who works there pt and who Ive always had wicked thoughts about was in picking up his check . Am sure by now if Karin and I had broken up by now he'd be number 50 something ................. Maybe even my bf although as I have written here before every guy I have gone around since I was 12 said I drove them insane ................ he was real good during the trouble with Karin that and now it's whole deeper relationship then one based on my lust . We're friends with a mutual respect which is nice. He was headed to meet buddys at a bar downtown no doubt to look for women . Lucky girls !


Picked up the black cocktail waitress dress and went to change in the locker room . The place was busy being full of the day crew leaving and the afternoon crew coming on . Several women were also taking showers which is rare .The hotel has 6 showers with intense water pressure that feels heavenly but hardly anyone uses them . Although moi as many of you regular readers know does indeed use them often m'bating as the water pours down on my naked body . The sudden new popularity of the showers was since a big part of the metro are even spreading across the river over to Indiana doesn't have power.The storms last weekend from hurricane Ike knocked it out and for some reason the power company hasn't got it all working again . Phyllis from the Gift Shop says some women have even been bringing in there kids for shower . The news made me feel happy we didn't lose out power


In the employee cafeteria ate with my boss Brendan and kept a happy face on .no trying to talk to him about the trouble with Marla and definitely didn't tell him how I'd talked to Marla the day before .Don't want to lose my mind worrying about them and also since Brendan is my boss have to get along with him to keep my job . He congratulated me about being MOD and says April the acting general manager was real impressed . And too that he knew I could do it . Then e got into shop talk . Lucky for moi I'd finished dinner and was ready to go to the Concierge Lounge when that hideous Barb Stuart showed up smiling at Brendan as if he was her man and even though she's always putting the knife in my back smiling from ear to ear at me ........................ I even smiled back at Barb just to keep things smooth .


The Concierge Lounge went fine . Didn't drink as much as I usually do up there .instead of the usual 3-4 merlots or 2hard liquor drinks had a single merlot . Do think I put more effort then usual into keeping the place tidy . I had to laff when several of the guests started moaning at the terrible economic news.One woman was so upset by the bad news on tv she wanted to put on a movie or game show instead. The copies of the WALL STREET JOURNAL had been read by so many I had to send down to the Gift shop for new ones.


Later worked the bar . Nothing went on .Had cocktail waitress Narla whose gay & fun . She's now dating a female 911 operator and a GI Jane from Knox. I hope she can handle it all ................... Seeing /sleeping with several people both at the same time can be quite the hoot . Moi always loved the intrigue and feeling of power . And shifting gears in more ways then one when fooling around with both another female and also a guy . But at this point in life thats more then I could deal with , just don't have the energy And I'm actually happy about that .


Heading out today in a pink T shirt & white painter's pants .At work the penguin suit and orthies .

[Lena]

Congratulations to all Scots for inventing golf . I never knew or TBB much cared about golf but at nite learned all a body could want to learn about golf and then some from a group of golf fanatics at work . Talk about having your ear talked off ! It's the Ryder Cup which I now know is one of the biggest events in golf here this week . Some of the players and many ( too many ! ) of the fans are staying at the hotel . Filling up the bar with there never ending and usually excited talk about the tournament and of course all things golf..........................


Golf really is it's own little world but to it's fans it's everything .All sorts of talk about the various tournaments and players. Naturally Tiger Woods is a god to that bunch . He isn't playing this year but heard he may be showing up to watch .Many Americans but also people from all over the world including Europe and Japan along with Canada and Mexico . Mostly men and with a tendency to look affluent , good lord it was like working at my pt job at the country club The RALPH LAUREN polo shirts were all over the place and the AMERICAN EXPRESS GOLD CARDS were flying . Affable too , nowhere like those world famous ( or infamous ) European soccer fans and also some American basketball fans who can get insane and violent .The golfers were just like the genteel and sociable horse people I see all the time , guess that comes with being a gentleman sports lover. Although some of the Americans were cussing out this guy on the European team named Garcia .


Moi served up alot of mint juleps the official drink of the Kentucky Derby. Got tipped for the first time in years in Japanese yen too Hotel bars must be unbelievably expensive every where else in the world since even though or drinks come with a huge mark-up was told by Europeans and Japanese that our prices are dirt cheap compared to what they are in Stockholm , Munich , and Tokyo . Had me thinking that if I lived in any of those places the inevitable trip to AA wud have to come sooner then later ...............


Moi too learned she gets to be a boss again this week-end .Like the Kentucky Derby the Ryder Cup comes with a ton of entertainment and moi is the manger or at least a banquet Captain at a huge party for the golf lovers this saturday My friend & former cocktail waitress now Banquets manager Siobhan asked for moi's help ! My meteoric rise up the corporate ladder is head twirling , after 6 years am finally jumping into mid level management ..................


Did promise to mentioned earlier this week about running into the ex of my best friend Leslie . We ran into Madge McKeithan at a girl bar monday and she was shocked & confused about Leslie . I can get the same way dealing with the madness of Les first trying to be good mom and good person then reverting to her old bad girl ways , like the time she and her son and I were at the Oxmoor mall and she slipped off to f*ck that rail cop bf of hers in the service corridor. . Poor Madge is the same but in the opposite directions and more then a little frustrated since I do think she still likes Les and wants to get things going again .to be fair Madge had already had a few too many drinks but she just sat there blaring way at me in a angry/frustrated way asking that gives with Leslie . First she says she hears Les was dancing the other week at her old club ( true too, taking naughty break from being a single mom and student ) and including being wild with one of the dancers on stage ( didn't tell Madge how Les bragged about having sex with her & some suit from out of town later the same nite , have to be discreet ) with Madge thinking the old Les is still around and they could go back to doing all the wild and crazy things they did when they were going together like the lesbian orgy and those two guys who played for the ATLANTA BRAVES.......


But then when she called Les up the talk soon turned to Les's new interest in fundamentalist religion which blew Madge away . Madge now sounding downright angry and hurt using swear words galore said at first she thought that was a joke but then realized Les meant it .Madge said she was even going to a revival meeting later that nite . Madge finished it all up by adding that the next thing she'll hear Leslie is back dancing but worshipping 'that old homo the pope " which didn't impress Catholic Karin . Soon the still angry Madge was gone . Karin only said I sure know some charming people .................... Sad but true . And all I can say about Les is while I love her with her it's all ego . She loves the attention from men watching her dance topless and also from being around a bunch of religious fanatics and phonys who claim to be religious ( maybe including some of the guys who were watching here dance and hollaring for her to 'shake that thing " ?) thinking she's holy or saved and the rest of us are going to hell..................


Not much today before work . Going to get my teeth cleaned then go right back to getting them them discolored by heading to the coffee boutique . Dressing up in a low key way ..........................yellow polo shirt and Karin's lime green poplin mini with my brown kitten heels . At work the black cocktail waitress dress , nude thigh tops, and black flats .