Urgent!

[KSmith]

hi, can anyone help? my husband confessed a few months ago to having an affair. it was very short lived and never got past the kissing stage. the worst part of it was that the other woman was a relative (only of sorts, she was the sister of our daughter's ex partner).

anyway, we are still together. for better or worse we decided to save the marriage and our relationship. however, i now feel the need to talk to her face to face and have her look me in the eye and explain her actions, having gone through all of this already with my husband. so this morning i rang her and asked her to meet me.

she was very snotty and really busy (she owns a florist shop and mother's day is coming up, don't you know?). so she couldn't see me till after mother's day. i was so flabbergasted at her lack of remorse and shame i agreed to wait. however, after the initial shock i rang back to say i needed to speak to her today and would call up after she closed the shop. she refused point blank to see me today and then in mid flow suddenly changed her tune and said she had nothing to explain and i had accused her 2yrs ago of the same thing and was wrong on that occasion also.

I was a bit taken aback by this sudden denial when her husband came on the phone and said 'nothing happened' and i should leave them alone. from this i get the impression she has denied having the affair to her family and they simply think i'm some potty woman who's accused this poor innocent of messing with my husband.

So what i really want to know is, how do i show her up for what she is without showing myself up. all ideas gratefully recieved. please!

[Salli]

Sounds to me like you are building this up to more than it is. It was probably more real in his mind than it was in fact. If you've really forgiven your husband put it behind you and move on

[Fatlisa]

Who cares what this other women thinks, she is a b!tch and you should just leave it and get on with your own life.

Why do you even want to talk to her? What do you hope to achieve. i can't see that anything good would come out of talking to her, so just move on and forget her.

As far as she is concerned she doesn't owe you any explaniation and i don't think you will get one from her.

[KSmith]

Who cares what this other women thinks, she is a b!tch and you should just leave it and get on with your own life.

Why do you even want to talk to her? What do you hope to achieve. i can't see that anything good would come out of talking to her, so just move on and forget her.

As far as she is concerned she doesn't owe you any explaniation and i don't think you will get one from her.

I suppose I am after revenge and finalisation of the issue really

[Fatlisa]

You definitly won't get that from her. Just pertend she doesn't exist anymore and make a go of things with your husband.

[Rights-4Ladies]

KSmith Hi As you say you probably just want revenge, but although you do not think this has happened you unknowingly have.
You and your partner have faced up to this and sorted yourself out, she and more importantly her other half have not. Deny they might but remember the seed of doubt has been sown, next time she goes missing or cannot explain to her actions to her husband where shes been then he will wonder, it will eat at thier relationship because in his heart he will know she lied, they are only fooling themselves. Your solution was based on honesty you will be ok they are doomed. There is the satisfaction for you, on the surface all may appear fine with them, but under no chance! You have won now move on

[Janey]

KSmith Hi As you say you probably just want revenge, but although you do not think this has happened you unknowingly have.
You and your partner have faced up to this and sorted yourself out, she and more importantly her other half have not. Deny they might but remember the seed of doubt has been sown, next time she goes missing or cannot explain to her actions to her husband where shes been then he will wonder, it will eat at thier relationship because in his heart he will know she lied, they are only fooling themselves. Your solution was based on honesty you will be ok they are doomed. There is the satisfaction for you, on the surface all may appear fine with them, but under no chance! You have won now move on

Must be difficult not to put weedkiller in the plants but you have to move on before it kills you.