Need a Womans Advice ASAP!!!

[X834ander]

Hello,

this issue is causing me some great distress, desperate for some advice!!!!

Im about to go to court to try and get a contact order to see me 2 year old boy, I live about 200miles from where my ex and son currently live and my gf has only met him the once. My current gf supports me completely in it, but i really really really need her with me when im in court, i cant do it without her....but she wont come. She doesnt like my ex because of what she has put me through over the last year and she doesnt want to see her.....this is according to her the only reason.

The last thing i want to do is upset my gf as i really do love her with all my heart, this whole situation has completely broken me and i really need her, i cant help but feel abandoned and i know i shouldnt cos i cant even begin to understand what she's going through (the fact i have a son with someone else)

I dont know what to do, i know she'll be their for me at home but i need her with me too. I know this has got to be hard for her too but i cant help but feeling like a selfish prick in thinking " why cant she see just how bad this is getting to me and forget about my ex and just be there for me "

please please please please help me!!!..........im only 22 and this whole thing has even caused me to hav heart problems, im just scared if i gain my son i lose my gf.....and i love them both so much!!

[Guest]

Your girlfriend sounds a bit selfish to me. She doesn't want to go because she doesn't like your ex? That's bunk.

Personally, I don't think it's a good idea for her to be there anyway. If there's animosity between the women, it might make it harder in some way for you to get custody or visitation with your son if your ex doesn't want him around her.

If you think you have to CHOOSE between your son and your girlfriend, then you're heading for trouble. Any woman that makes a man feel like that about his child doesn't belong in that relationship. There's plenty more fish in the ocean ...throw that one back and find yourself a nice girl that supports you in all ways.

[Suniya]

Hello X83,
I am even younger than you but I can understand why your G/f does not want to go to the court. It seems harsh but I would be the same. Really, this is something that you have to do for yourself. I think that she wants to SEE that you can handle this on your own and not be a nervous wreck needing her help.
If you are weak handling this she might well think you will be weak when you hit a crisis and SHE needs YOU to be strong for HER. Sorry but that's how we think.

Suniya xx