Nappies- wierd ?

[jbz2079]

Thanks Jo40 for that detailed and interesting post.
Having travelled around the UK over the years and can sympathise with the bit about public toilets, the ones that are available are usually filthy places.
But even those are getting scarce due to public service cutbacks.

Travelling as you say is full of delays and often public transport has no toilet facilities available either on busses and train or at the stations.

Many years ago we were traveling by car on a motorway and my girlfriend said I could have done with a toilet stop at those services.
I said you should have said before we got past them.
Anyway we continued on the motorway and I said the next services are about 30 minutes away, are you ok or would you like me to pull off at the next exit?
No I'm fine she answered, I should last.
As time went on and we got to the 20 minute mark she looked very uncomfortable, I asked if she wanted me to stop and she said no I think I'll make it.
As we got within a mile of the next services she looked at me and said, I'm sorry but I didn't make it!
I thought she was joking and stopped at the services anyway, when we stopped she said can you park somewhere out of the way while I try and get this mess sorted.
I realised that she had infact had a rather large accident and her trousers and the car seat were both soaked.
She was appologising for the mess and said she could not hold it, I was trying not to laugh and felt sorry for her embarrisment, Fortunatly she had a change of clothes in boot and I got a plastic bag to cover the seat.
I had to remove the seat to wash and dry it and the carpets from that side of the car, my girlfriend thought I was mad at her, but the truth was I was just glad it was her and not me that had the accident, many a time in traffic I've been bursting for a wee and had a few close shaves myself.

[KIimberly]

I wear them every night, and love to wet them, always suck my dummy in bed. I wear pampers in the day.

[Jo14]

I’m glad you found the post interesting jbz2079, it sounds like you’ve had some direct experience of toilet desperation re your girl friend. I’m also glad you were not cross with her, I’m sure she felt bad enough anyway.

I haven’t been back in the UK for a while now, but it doesn’t sound like things are improving. I’m based in France now where some things are good and others definitely worse. The toilets are definitely worse; the ‘classic’ French design requires you to pull the flush and sort of leap-frog out of the cubical at the same time, or risk soaking wet feet. They strike fear into all but the most devout Francophiles but at least there is no seat to get dirty!

On the positive side the French do have a more relaxed attitude to answering the call in public, the men and the women to some extent, they just don’t care! Despite this, I think walking up a side street and just going for it is a step too far for most of us. If you do use diapers for whatever reason they are a lot easier to purchase, they are stocked in most Supermarkets and most Pharmacies. This might due to the way that health system works in that you buy what you need and then get reimbursed by whatever health insurance you have elected to pay into. As a result the ‘products’ are much more widely available and no one bats an eye when you arrive at the till with them.
I don’t know whether ‘diapering up’ is common in France. I remember one time I went back to the UK I needed take the train from Clermont to Paris, it takes about 3 and half hours. Our carriage wasn’t very full and young woman a couple of seats away was reaching up to put her travel bag on the overhead rack. As she did so part of her blouse un-tucked from her trousers revealing the top of, you guessed it, a diaper. I think a couple of kids had noticed because they had muttered ‘la couche’ to each other, which the French actually use for baby nappies. Anyway a nice gentleman tapped her on the shoulder and whispered something to her, she responded with a cheery ‘merci’ and calmly tucked herself in. So no big deal but hence my point about clothing in my previous post. All the same, I had to smile to myself because there can’t have been more than 12 of us in the carriage and at least two of us were wearing diapers for the trip.

About halfway though the journey I got up for a leg stretch and checked out the loo anyway, to see what I might be missing. Peering in there was the usual collection of used paper towels overflowing from the bin, no clean paper towels and some liquid of unknown origin bobbling about on the toilet seat. If I actually tried to use this loo I could just see me having a Bridget Jones moment : Pull knickers and skirt down to half-mast, bend down and try to hover over toilet so as not to touch the liquid of unknown origin. Train hits some points, I pitch forward and head-but washbasin. Rebounding back I sit on liquid of unknown origin, stand up in shock and pee all over skirt and knickers anyway. Hmmm, exactly sort of accident I’m trying to avoid!

So, I thought I’d try and hang on for the nice loos in the Eurostar terminal at Gare du Nord. Unfortunately, standing around in a queue for a Metro ticket at rather chilly Gare de Lyon got the better of me.

Sorry about the slightly comedic take on things, but you’ve got to hold on to your sense of humour even if you can’t hold on to your pee!

Jo

[jbz2079]

I does make me wonder at times where all the fuss and prudism comes from?
I mean everyone needs to pee and usually several times a in a normall day.

But looking around at most towns and cities it would appear that we are just not geared up for that need.

I must admit that when I was younger, before I got incontinence I was very pee shy,
If I was out drinking with friends I would always time going for a pee whenever none of them were in there, usually because I just could never relax enough standing in the line at the trough with others, I'd usually grab the toilet cubicle to go for a pee.
These days I use a legbag during the daytime and when the need arises I can still use the toilet to empty the legbag.
Far more convieniant than the two years I spent in nappies 24/7.
Then going out for more than a couple of hours always ment planning in advance, finding somewhere sutable to change a disposable nappy and always carry spare nappies around.

I still use nappies at night as this is the best solution to the problem.
After 7 years I've got used to using nappies, just as I've got used to using glasses to read with.

In the UK anyone who has problems with continence that goes to see a medical professional and has the various tests and can't be helped or cured gets"products" supplied, due to this they are not a common sight in supermarkets and most pharmacies.
As Jo mentioned in France and also in the USA they have a totally different system and most people buy their nappies for their own use, so they are stocked in shops and pharmacies.

[Guest bed wetter nappy wearer]

I am a 35 year old male. Recently re-started bed wetting.
I have had so many different tests done and the docs can't find a cause or reason why. The only thing suggested to me was protection. Bed protection was useless and pads in my underware was useless too. My wife suggested nappies and they work perfectly.
I use Lille classic and Lille supreme. Classics mainly at night and I do have to wear something during the day as I have stress incontinence too. The supreme nappies are much more discreet and better for day wear.

It's not weird that people wear nappies, if they have a good reason to. It's also not surprising that there are people that enjoy wearing nappies and find them sexy. It's all about bondage I think. Not really sure... Hahaha

[jbz2079]

I would have to disagree about the liking of nappies linked to bondage.
No doubt there are some look at it from that direction.
I was thinking today, I have Diabetes, type 2 and lots of people that suffer diabetes get urinary incontinence as a side effect.
I already had incontinence before being diagagnosed with diabetes, but lets just say it has not helped that condition, especially at night.
I'm surprised that no one has mentioned being diabetic yet on this post.

[cookies]

this is pretty much the only place i could find to talk about this so here goes.

my boyfriend wets the bed. he started a few months ago he says. we're both 22 if that matters. he has nappies but he's too embarrassed to let me see him in them, we've never slept in the same bed together. since he lives 2 hours away and i have to use public transport, it makes sense to sleep over at his since it's 4 hours there and back. but like i said, we've never slept in the same bed together. we haven't seen each other since september and that was only for a few hours.

this problem is what's stopping us from seeing each other. we're both desperate to see each other but he's so terrified of wetting the bed when i'm there that he doesn't want me round. i understand how difficult it must be for him so i've been trying to not push him, but it's getting to the point where you know, i think we just need to do it.

i'm very supportive and he knows this, but he's still very scared. it must be so horrible for him. does anybody have any tips? i've said so many times it's ok, i know it all and nothing will happen and even if he does wet the bed it'll be ok. with the nappies he wouldn't wet the bed but he says i wouldn't find him sexy in them. i've suggested putting some pj trousers or something over the nappy but that hasn't alleviated his fears at all.

we haven't been to the doctor, he's too scared too. like i said, we haven't seen each other since september because of this.

[Jo14]

Hi cookies,

Firstly, good for you for being so understanding, as you’ve probably found on other discussion boards not everyone is so accommodating.

I may have got this wrong, but reading your post it sounds like you may be trying to cross 2 bridges at the same time. Sleeping together as in ‘love making’ and sleeping together as in, sharing a bed for the first time with your boyfriend wearing a nappy.

Perhaps you could organise spending some intimate afternoons together in bed (no nappies around). Once you’re really comfortable with each other you could sleep in the same bed without the pressure of trying to be ‘sexy’ at the same time, if you really care for each other the rest should take care of itself.

If there are still some issues you could subtly point your boyfriend in the direction of a discussion board such as this, where he would find out that bedwetting is not that uncommon. Also that there are plenty of people in steady relationships with a partner who wets, nappies are just a practical solution to a practical problem. Obviously finding your post might not go down so well, but to be honest it just shows that you care and really want your relationship to move forward.

Hope this helps,

Jo

[jbz2079]

From a male point of view.
Jo's answer was just about spot on, and I agree that you want credit for being so understanding.
I would only add that if your boyfriends bedwetting is something that has recently started, rather than something he's had all his life, he really should
seek medical advice.
It could be something simple, and be easily cured.
He should not be so scared or embarrised there are thousands maybey tens of thousands of adults that have this problem and people in the medical profession are totally used to seeing people with these sort of complaints.

I suffer from this problem, but I have it 24 hours a day, I've been for all the tests and although it took 18 months to find the cause, I'm happy that I know why it happens, and even though there is no cure for me, I got help to deal with the problem.

I have had several good long term relationships even with this problem, basically is you have an undestanding girlfriend and you can get over the embarrisment, things are not as impossible as they first seem.
If you both have feelings for each other this just becomes another part of life, accepted by both, just another thing that's part of someone.

Another way to look at it is, there are far worse things that can happen in life, yes it's embarrising and inconvieniant but it's not something that should
overule your life, it can become quite manageable, especially when you have someone who loves and supports you.

[wetting man]

Hi Cookies and Jo,

I too am a male bedwetter, and I have been through the very same problems as you explained.
The support and advice that Jo has given is really very accurate and should be considered.

I have to use nappies 24/7 and these have never stopped me having any relationships or issues
in the bedroom department. It is very difficult at first, but once your through the first time, there
should really be no problem, eve if your boy friend is embarrased.
Try talking to him about doing what Jo suggests and see if you can get to spend a weekend together and
get the sexy time during the day, and lots of cuddles under the duvet at night.

[cookies]

thanks guys. the getting used to being in bed during the day when it's not time to go to bed sounds like a good idea to get him comfortable with the idea. fyi i literally am just looking to literally just sleep in the same bed at the moment. i'm still a virgin and not ready for sex just yet.

[cookies]

also, if anyone's got any links to other forums, specifically ones about this issue then i'd appreciate it =]

[jbz2079]

Hi Cookies you could try http://forum.bladderandbowelfoundation.org/
That's the only non fetish site I can think of in the UK
You could also try a Google search.

[Guest]

Hello again Cookies

There are lots of other forums and discussion boards covering this and related issues, just bear in mind that there are also lots of other reasons why people wear nappies and like to talk about it. As jbz2079 indicated, the trick is to try and avoid the less helpful sites.

The site below seems to have a lot of useful information on it.


Otherwise, try including the word ‘Enuresis’ in your searches, this is the medical term for bed wetting and should help keep you on the right track.

Jo

[Guest]

A few hard slaps would put an end to his nonsense.

Adult Baby. I've never heard such rubbish.