why are men all bastards??

[Mr A]

according to this it's in our nature to cheat.
so if anybody here is still in a relationship for more than 4 years then good on ya

I don't believe that. I think all people that cheat should be exterminated and only the superior (non cheating) people should exist. I'm turning into a new kind of Hitler.

cheating is not nice on the other person male or female

but from evolutionary perspective it seems it may be kinda beneficial to have cheaters or be a cheater. like a cheating man, ..it's not nice for his partner but by cheating he increases the odds of passing on his genes to the next generation, and increases the chances of genetic imortality on his part.

so much of human behavoir can be traced back to many years ago and explained through evolution.

cheating i believe is one of them.

[cristy]

according to this it's in our nature to cheat.
so if anybody here is still in a relationship for more than 4 years then good on ya

I don't believe that. I think all people that cheat should be exterminated and only the superior (non cheating) people should exist. I'm turning into a new kind of Hitler.

cheating is not nice on the other person male or female

but from evolutionary perspective it seems it may be kinda beneficial to have cheaters or be a cheater. like a cheating man, ..it's not nice for his partner but by cheating he increases the odds of passing on his genes to the next generation, and increases the chances of genetic imortality on his part.

so much of human behavoir can be traced back to many years ago and explained through evolution.

cheating i believe is one of them.

So in conclusion bad, inferior genes are carried on? Hmm, exterminate them?
Those people just shouldn't have children. Have you ever watched the movie "Idiocracy" (2006)? You should...

[Bouncy]

according to this it's in our nature to cheat.
so if anybody here is still in a relationship for more than 4 years then good on ya

I don't believe that. I think all people that cheat should be exterminated and only the superior (non cheating) people should exist. I'm turning into a new kind of Hitler.

cheating is not nice on the other person male or female

but from evolutionary perspective it seems it may be kinda beneficial to have cheaters or be a cheater. like a cheating man, ..it's not nice for his partner but by cheating he increases the odds of passing on his genes to the next generation, and increases the chances of genetic imortality on his part.

so much of human behavoir can be traced back to many years ago and explained through evolution.

cheating i believe is one of them.

You're right Mr A. It's not human nature to be monogamous and take one partner for life. That's a dream/fantasy that society has bought into and it's drummed into us by many religions.

It's fantastic when you do manage to find that one person you can and want to spend the rest of your life with, but that doesn't mean that you never find another human being attractive. You interact with people every day and the odds are pretty bloody good that one of those people can turn on certain attraction buttons. This kind of feeling isn't limited to gender. It depends solely on the type of person you are whether or not you're going to act out on those feelings. Society has told us that's a negative thing.

[Mr A]

according to this it's in our nature to cheat.
so if anybody here is still in a relationship for more than 4 years then good on ya

I don't believe that. I think all people that cheat should be exterminated and only the superior (non cheating) people should exist. I'm turning into a new kind of Hitler.

cheating is not nice on the other person male or female

but from evolutionary perspective it seems it may be kinda beneficial to have cheaters or be a cheater. like a cheating man, ..it's not nice for his partner but by cheating he increases the odds of passing on his genes to the next generation, and increases the chances of genetic imortality on his part.

so much of human behavoir can be traced back to many years ago and explained through evolution.

cheating i believe is one of them.

So in conclusion bad, inferior genes are carried on? Hmm, exterminate them?
Those people just shouldn't have children. Have you ever watched the movie "Idiocracy" (2006)? You should...

nope havent seen that film lol. i shall keep a look out for it if it ever comes on tv

I agree with what Bouncy is saying.
and i don't think people who cheat have bad inferior genes, they're just acting out what they were programmed to do

I think we as a society have through the ages as we have become more civilized we have also become more kindhearted in some regards ..argubably too kindhearted, so you increasingly get all these behavoirs that from an evolutionary perspective make good sence ..but from society's perspective are frowned upon.

example of how we have become argubably too kindhearted.
a man and a woman fall in love they get married. both the man and woman are really looking forward to having children and raising a family together. it later turns out the wife cannot have children, the wife tells the man to leave her and go with someone who can give him children, the man devoted to his wife refuses to leave her.

the wife has no children ..and so does the man.
because he was so loving/caring the mans genes don't get passed on next generation, personally i think such a person should have children and pass those gene's on. argubably he was too kind?

if he was to comtemplate cheating his gene's would maybe get passed on
you see from nature's perspective cheating isn't all that bad.

[Crimson]

I don't think most guys are bastards, least not in the beginning. People don't just one day go "I think I'll treat women like S*** today". The good guys usually turn bad after women start playing mind games with them. The good guy will treat the woman great, give her the world, and she'll want more. The guy can't take it, and he starts finding a way out. She starts to see that he isn't as fun to be with anymore because she expects too much. She then starts to neglect him and he feels like S*** and well it just goes downhill from there. Or you have the one relationship where the guy has been treated like S***, and thus starts to look at women all the same. He treats his girlfriend like S*** and then she starts to think all men are the same, and she doesn't give the honest good guys a chance. It's a never ending cycle, I guess it all comes down to whether you are willing to look past your own past and give the new person in your life a chance, otherwise you're just retracing your steps. It really sucks to get the reputation of other guys when you've yet to do any of those things, it isn't fair.

[cristy]

and i don't think people who cheat have bad inferior genes, they're just acting out what they were programmed to do

There are people who wouldn't cheat. It's not in my genes to cheat for example, if it were I would have always done that until now. Anyone can stop themselves from cheating but not everyone will. I guess our choices define us right?

[Crimson]

and i don't think people who cheat have bad inferior genes, they're just acting out what they were programmed to do

There are people who wouldn't cheat. It's not in my genes to cheat for example, if it were I would have always done that until now. Anyone can stop themselves from cheating but not everyone will. I guess our choices define us right?

Agreed, I don't ever forsee myself cheating, it's just not in me. Sure I may think about it, but I think everyone does at one point. It's what you do that'll determine the kind of person you are.

[cristy]

I agree that people have instincts and their instincts may guide them to procreation and violence but that's why we all have reason and reason should rule over instincts. That's the difference between the evolved man and the monkey...

[SM]

Agreed, I don't ever forsee myself cheating, it's just not in me. Sure I may think about it, but I think everyone does at one point. It's what you do that'll determine the kind of person you are.

Haha, you cannot foresee such things. Try being in a long-term relationship where the passion has turned into cold going-through-the-motions sex. Where the things that irritate stack up and tip the scales against the things that don't. Where there is so much taking each other for granted and not really having the time for each other.

All it takes is someone to come along and pay one or the other a bit of attention and you can wave goodbye to your principles. I would suggest that most relationships break down because one or the other has found someone else (especially with men). But that is just my opinion.

[cristy]

All it takes is someone to come along and pay one or the other a bit of attention and you can wave goodbye to your principles. I would suggest that most relationships break down because one or the other has found someone else (especially with men). But that is just my opinion.

Hmm well that's when reason comes along and says to the man that he should first break up with the girl before sleeping with another female. And there's no cheating involved....

[SM]

All it takes is someone to come along and pay one or the other a bit of attention and you can wave goodbye to your principles. I would suggest that most relationships break down because one or the other has found someone else (especially with men). But that is just my opinion.

Hmm well that's when reason comes along and says to the man that he should first break up with the girl before sleeping with another female. And there's no cheating involved....

But would reason not tell someone to 'try before they buy'.

I understand where you are coming from and would love to agree. But it seems a bit 'ideal world' too me. Life is never as black and white as this.

[cristy]

All it takes is someone to come along and pay one or the other a bit of attention and you can wave goodbye to your principles. I would suggest that most relationships break down because one or the other has found someone else (especially with men). But that is just my opinion.

Hmm well that's when reason comes along and says to the man that he should first break up with the girl before sleeping with another female. And there's no cheating involved....

But would reason not tell someone to 'try before they buy'.

I understand where you are coming from and would love to agree. But it seems a bit 'ideal world' too me. Life is never as black and white as this.

There's no black and white here, it's about choices. And what's wrong with ideal? It was created for some reason: to be followed. What is best: to hurt someone with lies and cheating or not to hurt someone? What is morally right: the commercial principle of trying before you buy that has been extended from objects to people making people equal to objects or the "principle" of empathy which leads us to understand that hurting another human being isn't inferior to our own selfish desires and instincts?
It's all about choice, we are not automatic machines programmed to do a job, we are supposed to be better and control both the animal and electronic world yet we reduce ourselves to them because we chose so.

[Mr A]

and i don't think people who cheat have bad inferior genes, they're just acting out what they were programmed to do

There are people who wouldn't cheat. It's not in my genes to cheat for example, if it were I would have always done that until now. Anyone can stop themselves from cheating but not everyone will. I guess our choices define us right?

Agreed, I don't ever forsee myself cheating, it's just not in me. Sure I may think about it, but I think everyone does at one point. It's what you do that'll determine the kind of person you are.

yes, I think the choices we make in life shows what type of a person we are but i also do not think a single choice defines us either.

cheating for example. people in a monogomous relationship who don't cheat, why don't they cheat if they are tempted?
sex with other people is enjoyable so if they are tempted why don't they do it?
in a nutshell i think it's because of the feelings surrounding thier partner are greater then thier desires to have sex with others.

people who do cheat ...well some just plain don't care how the other person feels ...but i believe most people who cheat do care ..and genuinely do feel bad about it, however in a nutshell again what i think it boils doen to is thier desire to have sex or be intimate with others is greater than thier feelings surounding thier partners.


cheating, personally i have not cheated before. but under the right circumstances would I? ...don't know until it actually happens but in all honesty i'd say they would probably be a fair chance under the right circumstances.

If I got cheated on, yeah I be pissed, who wouldn't ...but i don't think i'd actually be that "hurt" though if it were just sex. I think i would be angry ..but not really all that "hurt"...suppose it would depend on the woman and how deeply i felt about her. hmmm ...but again couldn't be sure how i'd really feel until it actually happened.

[cristy]

Mr. A my advice to you is: don't cheat if you have a heart and morals, however it is your choice.
People who choose to cheat are close to murderers to me.

[Bouncy]

People who choose to cheat are close to murderers to me.

That's a pretty bold statement.

What about those who have a different definition of cheating? Say, the woman who thinks if a man looks at a picture of a naked woman and thinks she's attractive. Is that cheating? To some women it is. Is that man then close to being a murderer? He is if your definition of cheats and murderers fits.

I pity the man who decides on being an art critic or nude photographer as a career. Who knows when they'll lose control and kill someone.