I was a suit for six months.
When I left school, I worked in insurance during the day and studied accountancy at night. That lasted all of six hellish months before in a single day-of-enlightenment, I dropped out of business school and quit my job. It was the best decision I ever made.
S D Monaghan
I lived in Thailand for a year.
So instead of getting another job, I sold some stuff, and bought a plane ticket to Thailand where I lived for a year, traveling around the untouristed regions and coasts, supplementing my living expenses by teaching English.
I could have been an air-traffic controller.
Upon my return from Thailand, I was shortlisted as a candidate for training to be an air-traffic controller in Dublin Airport. However, when they called me back for the final interview, which was to be in the evening, I went to a David Bowie concert instead. The guy who they interviewed instead of me, at short notice, when I didn’t turn up, is now head traffic controller in Ireland. Dublin Aviation Authority – you’re welcome. And the concert was great. Win-win.
Norman Mailer wrote to me.
So instead of being an air-traffic controller, I decided to write a book about my time in Thailand. When it was published, I sent a copy of it to my (then) favourite novelist, Norman Mailer in Florida. In return, he sent me a self-portrait he’d painted in the style of Picasso, with a dedication to me. I framed it.
I almost became a psychoanalyst.
Having published two early books, I finally went back to college, fulltime, as a mature student studying psychology. After I got my psychology degree, my Professors were eager for me to join up with the Lacanian School of psychoanalysis and do a doctorate in their field. I had basically signed up to do so, when at the last minute, I again left Ireland and moved to Canada. I’d done college already and now I needed to live somewhere else – permanently – as opposed to travelling around, like in Thailand.
I lived in Toronto for three years.
In Canada I studied screen writing. I was going to move there permanently but when I was granted my permanent visa, I realised that if I didn’t return back to Ireland I would, in effect, live in Canada for the rest of my life. It was a tough decision but I’ve never regretted moving back to Ireland. I still make it over to Toronto every summer just to hang out.
I was taught by Richard Ford.
Back in Ireland I did a Masters in Creative Writing in Trinity College where my teacher was the Pulitzer Prize winner Richard Ford. One of the first things he said to me was, “I am a writer. Therefore, I am not a nice man. I warn my friends, ‘Don’t tell me things’. Because if those things are interesting, I will have to put them in a book.”
I swear by acupuncture.
I have one session a week just for my general wellbeing. If I’m ill, I treat it with natural herbs from my herbalist and a visit to my acupuncturist. I know too many people who have left hospital in a worse state than when they had entered.
I’m an excellent cook.
… Even if I do say so myself – and I do. Never believe a person who says that they want their steak well-done. Just do it medium. I know best. The key to an excellent Chinese is sherry. Lots and lots of sherry. My signature dish is General Tao Chicken. It’s all about the “marinating”.
I always read two books simultaneously.
I read one book in the traditional or eBook format. But I’ll have a second one on the go in the car, in audio form. I work mostly from home so I would only spend about 30 minutes a day in the car. However, that’s enough time to get through at least one novel a month. The first audio book I finished was Moby Dick – it took a month, driving 30 mins a day, five days a week. Most books are much shorter than Melville’s masterpiece, so I get through approximately 18 extra novels a year, simply by turning off the disposable pop while driving, and listening to a novel instead. Everyone in the world (who drives) should do this.
