Kevin Smith's piles of justice

Director Kevin Smith had to be excused from jury duty - because of haemorrhoids.Smith, who was behind the lens for hit movies 'Clerks' and 'Dogma', was in so much pain that he had to stand by the jury box while a witness was testifying.A bailiff noticed the director was in agony and called him over to see what the problem was.Smith revealed to Britain's Arena magazine that he told the judge: "I think one of my haemorrhoids broke. I'm bleeding rectally and I feel like someone has slid a knife up my ass, your honour.He added: "I've never had that done to me before, but it's what I imagine that would feel like. At that point I was excused from the case."