Gwen Stefani tried "everything to fix" her marriage to Gavin Rossdale.
Gwen Stefani
The 'What You Waiting For' hitmaker was "devastated" when her relationship started crumbling but channelled all her negative feelings into songwriting.
She said: "I just think what happened was: In February, my family fell apart. It was devastating. I didn't know what to do. It was a real big secret but I'm not good with that. I tried everything to fix it.
"By June, I went into the studio and started writing. I was praying. I had already started on a spiritual journey when I got pregnant with Apollo that was sort of like, 'Wow, really? I'm gonna be blessed with a baby... now?' That was a miracle. It just started me on this spiritual journey and thank God it started then because I was prepared when I had the tragedy. I had that nest of spirituality in me."
The 46-year-old singer - who has sons, Kingston, nine, Zuma, seven and Apollo, two, with Gavin - was even more hurt by the split because she had dreams about having a perfect relationship like her parents.
She added to PrideSource: "My whole life all I wanted to do was be a mother and a wife, and I had the dream of having this family because that's what I had. I have parents who've been married since high school, who are in love, and they're still in love and having their big wedding anniversary.
"I had a perfect example, so it's super tragic for me. My dreams are shattered and I feel so embarrassed about what happened. I don't feel embarrassed to talk about it though, with respect to my kids."
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