Mel B's father's death gave her the "clarity and strength" to get her life "on the right track".
The former Spice Girls singer filed for divorce from her husband Stephen Belafonte in March and claimed he had been abusive, cheated on her with their nanny and even tried to stop her seeing her dad Martin before he died, and she has now admitted she is "thankful" for the "awakening" she received with the family tragedy.
In an emotional post on Instagram, she wrote: "The pain of loosing my daddy is beyond anyone could ever understand, but in the mist of all my raw emotions and pain of his passing he gave me the clarity and strength to set my life on the right track.
"And I'm sooo thankful of this awakening from march 4th when he died I now live in my truth to correct with no shame the life every girl/daddy's girl should live, and that's a life with no fear or disrespect. But a life with ONLY love and respect and honesty.
And the 42-year-old star - who has daughters Phoenix, 18, and Angel, 10, from past relationships and five-year-old Madison with Stephen - admitted she wishes she could have one final conversation with her dad so she could reassure him she had learned from her mistakes.
She continued: "Dad I love you but I would give anything just to talk you one last time just so you know how much I truly love you and for you to know I'm now living THAT life and no matter what anyone says or anyone does I will ALWAYS and forever only live this way.
"So I hope you forgive me for my mistakes and trust in me that my eyes are now wide open and I want to do you proud from here on.(sic)"