The Geezer Life: Danny Dyer

A: We were about three weeks into shooting when he turned up and the whole crew doubled in size. You'd walk on set and you'd see this geezer and you'd be like 'Who the f**king hell's that?' We're talking a geezer of about 7'4". I mean, they looked like they should have death row suits on. He's got a nutritionist, he's got someone that drives him, he's got a marine, a geezer that runs around the corner and picks up a bit of chicken for him when he wants it. And they're all sort of vying for his attention as well. But if you get him on his own and have a one-on-one he's lovely.

Q: Did any of the entourage carry guns?

A: Not that I saw, but I'm sure they had a few tools wrapped around 'em, they must have done, yeah, in case it goes off. I'm sure the marine had a few things up his sleeve. But I think 50 Cent could hold his own with anyone really.

Q: What were your first impressions of 50?

A: Well, initially, I did expect him to jump out of a limo with a cap on back to front and bling and a puffer jacket, and that couldn't have been anymore different to how he was. I loved that. He's a businessman, let's not forget, he was a crack dealer, he comes from f**k all, and look at him now.

Q: Were you pleased with the reaction to the film?

A: Thing is, I knew we were going to get savaged by the critics. I just knew it: 'Oh 'Dead Man Running', Danny Dyer, Tamer Hassan, same old b******s, whatever' but it earned a few quid. We only got a release on 80 screens, which was a shame. If we'd had more screens we'd have f**king smashed it. ' I'm not claiming it s a masterpiece, but it's a good little film. I think an audience want to be able to have a couple of pints and go to the cinema, they want to sit there and enjoy a film where you haven't got to think too much. That's what films are about for me.

Q: People say you are a geezer, but you play a role, do some people misinterpret that when they meet you?

A: Well, doing documentaries like 'Deadliest Men' has done me no favours, I'll be the first to hold my hands up and admit that. 'Danny Dyer's Deadliest men' it makes me cringe to think about it. I never wanted that title anyway, the only reason I done those shows was money. Purely, I got two kids, I have a mortgage, I need to f**king earn money. People see you on 'The Bill' and think you are a multi-millionaire, it doesn't work like that. I've earned more money doing those TV series than I have out of any film.

Q: You had a run-in with Verne Troyer recently , what was that about?

A: I went to the Pride of Britain awards, and I was put at a table with him and Peter Andre, that was a bit of an odd thing, imagine that f**king night out! He's an odd character. Alright, we all know he's an - I can't say the M word, he's already said that - he's a little person, fair enough, but he was arrogant.

He was rude, he didn't speak to anyone on the table. He didn't give a f**k for any of the awards, he was texting on his phone, then he f**ked off halfway through. I introduced myself to him and he was fine, and I introduced my girlfriend and the way he looked at her - he just sort of stared at her all night from across the table.

He was leering, perverted, and trying to catch her eye to like smile, and all this s**t. I mean, I get that. I got the message, I saw what was going on. If it had been someone my height I would have gone, 'What the? What are you doing soppy b******s? F**king slow down'.

I made a comment in my magazine column and then he's got on this whole 'midget' thing. I used 'the M word' and all this s**t. Listen, I don't want no f**king feuds with a two foot man, it's embarrassing.

I don't want to upset people like that, but he can't go round upsetting people like that just because he's two feet f**king tall. He's a f**king 45-year-old man isn't he? The little p***k.

Q: What sort of work have you been turning down recently?

A: I turned down a movie recently called 'Cockneys Vs Zombies'. I thought f**k me, for f**k's sake. That's the final nail in the coffin for me. The fact they even had the front to use that title. I didn't even turn the first page. So I'm learning, like I said, when you struggle as an actor for so long, and being an actor is about rejection, being told no all the time, so when you get on a run, and people start writing parts for you, you can get a bit carried away with that and say yes to everything. And I've had a bit of a spell of going, 'Yeah, ok, I feel privileged that you want me in your film', and you've got to reign that in and say 'No, no no, it's not going to test me it's not going to challenge me, it's nothing new'.

Danny Dyer's 'Football Foul-Ups' DVD is available to buy now.

By Andy Tillett

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