Nicole Kidman still finds rejection hurtful.

Nicole Kidman

Nicole Kidman

The 50-year-old actress admits she has no "control" over her career because it's entirely reliant on other people deciding she is right for a particular project, and even after several decades in Hollywood, she still gets upset if casting directors are not "interested" in her.

She said: "Any actor will tell you that as much as we'd love to say we're in control of our own destiny, we're not.

"So much of our time is still spent asking, 'Are they interested in me?' And most of the time, your agent will say no. You learn about rejection early, and it's personal and it hurts."

But the 'Big Little Lies' star - who has kids Isabella, 25, and Conor, 22, with ex-husband Tom Cruise, and Sunday, nine, and six-year-old Faith with spouse Keith Urban - has had an incredibly successful 2017, and she is much more "appreciative" of that now than she was when she was younger.

She said: "It blows my mind actually, because it's all so unexpected.

"And it means more now. I'm so much more appreciative than I was about success in my twenties.

"Because of the rollercoaster life I've had, with ups and downs and contrasts, I know more of what life deals you at different times.

"But it's also important not to be attached to the success. That's the kiss of death."

The 'Killing of a Sacred Deer' actress admitted there is a lot of "fear" attached to her work but she likes to push through and make bold choices without worrying about the consequences.

She said: "There's an enormous amount of fear. It's just whether I can overcome the fear or push through it. But I probably don't think of consequences. I don't play things out. I like to jump off the cliff.

"I just say to myself, 'What is the worst that can happen?' So people don't like it, so I fall flat on my face - that's OK."


Tagged in