Introducing: Universal You

22 December 2008

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Gulzhan is from Kazakhstan and Paul is from Scotland. She was a translator and he was an oil worker. They now live in Scotland and write songs, perform songs and make cute babies. The third person in their band, the other guitarist, is a secret. Sometime Paul and Gulzhan don’t even know who it is.

In their last band in Kazakhstan they played a free concert and 12,000 people turned up. It’s true, they have the photos. It’s a lot tougher to pull that crowd in Scotland.

The band used to be called Kinky Durakee but she hated it as it made her sound like some seedy Thai bride/sex worker. So they changed it. She chose the new name.

Universal You is a song by The Cult. Paul would play like The Cult but she won’t have it. Musical influences are diverse and they can’t talk about them when in a room together or the band will split up. Michael Jackson, Queen, Guns N Roses, Amy Winehouse, The Who, The RHCP’s, Sheryl Crow, Head Automatica and Paulo Nutini.

Paul is right handed but plays guitar left handed. Gulzhan has very bad eyesight and is -20 in both eyes. She can be classed as disabled but she will not accept it. Specsavers are close friends. She has a personal trainer. It’s a bingo wings fear thing. She speaks Russian, not Kazakh. Kazakhstan was part of the Soviet Union and she found the Borat movie amusing but doesn’t drink horse urine. After 7 years together Paul speaks English and 50 words of Russian, it’s a British thing.

Her voice has been described as "Madonna with balls". To be clear, it’s her voice. After their first small gig back in Scotland Paul remembers going to the toilet in the venue and hearing a guy whistle their last song while standing at the urinal. He was dead chuffed. It was his Robbie Williams (Knebworth) Angels moment.

Paul saw Queen at Ingliston. In a life changing moment Freddie Mercury threw a cup of water into the crowd. He didn’t wash for a week. In his words, "I was anointed by Freddies water"…well. Everyone is always surprised she is the singer. At one gig the sound engineer tried to kick her off the stage saying "girlfriends aren’t allowed up here".

Paul wrote their new single "Your Sin City" in a hotel in Port Harcourt, Nigeria. You have to go there to understand. Paul writes all the songs but can’t sing. They always fall out when he sings his new songs to Gulzhan. His range or tone isn’t as extensive as hers. She shouldn't laugh though. She used to earn $30 a month as an English teacher in University in Kazakhstan. Her parents thought it was a good profession. She decided working for an oil company in an oil field, wearing jeans, drinking beer with the boys after work and earning 20 times more money was a better profession.

She has failed her driving test six times and still doesn’t drive. She is deeply embarrassed. Their last full page feature in The Scotsman newspaper described her as "the diminutive singer with the big voice". She also likes a recent article which mentioned "exotic good looks".

Gulzhans voice has been compared to Madonna, Stevie Nicks, Isobel Campbell, Sharleen Spiteri and a few others. The most interesting was “John Mayers lovechild”. Paul plays a Strat and can talk for hours about guitars and guitarists. Gulzhan doesn’t know what pick-ups or machine heads are but has her own microphone and earplugs.

Universal You open their live set with an instrumental track called “Jump”. It’s been described as having “all the excitement of a Bond car chase”. She was heavily pregnant when recording their demo album. There was a lot of toilet breaks and non-rock‘n’roll clothing.

They see the way The Kills get by without drummers and bassists. It’s been an inspiration and with the help of Ableton has resulted in adding more to their music than they originally thought possible. Zildjian, Paiste, Pearl, Modulus, Overwater..who?

Paul met Ewan McGregor in Russia during his round the world tour. Just two Scots in Astrakhan, a city of half a million people. This meeting is described in The Long Way Round book, page 147 I think. And he (Paul) doesn’t say "Och Aye" as often as is suggested.

She has an obsession with Heat Magazine. It comes out every Tuesday. She buys it religiously, she has had enough of Leo Tolstoi novels.

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