- Busy working parents feel they need at least half an hour to an hour to reconnect with their children
Parenting on Female First
- Parents feel pressured into spending six times longer on chores each evening than playing with their kids - spending only half an hour quality time with them per night
- New study shows you can turn off technology and reconnect with your kids in just 12 minutes –dubbed ‘We-connection Time’ by experts
- Almost half of those questioned worry they are not a good enough parent during the week
- The makers of Ribena Plus teamed up with mums to create the Twelve Minute Manual – a booklet of 30 fun things to do with your kids to help reconnect with them
Time-poor parents are spending the equivalent of seven days a year (39 minutes per day) trying to emotionally reconnect with their children and get back into the family mind-set when they return home from work and school, according to new research from the makers of Ribena Plus.
But the vital new study backed by child development experts shows parents are putting unnecessary pressure on themselves as it can take just 12 minutes to fully reconnect with their children when they come home from school, giving parents enough time to find out about their day, turn off technology and share an activity together.
These findings will be welcomed by parents, as a quarter of modern Mums and Dads who work currently feel they cannot fit the time they want to reconnect with their child into their evenings, with three per cent saying they do not feel like they spend any quality time with their kids at all during the week.
Over a third of parents admit they struggle to switch off from work mode at home and 45 per cent of time-pressed parents worry about chores while they are reconnecting with their kids.
This crucial time when families switch from work and school modes to becoming parents / children again has been dubbed the ‘We-connection Time’ by child experts.
Parenting expert and Child Psychologist Dr Claire Halsey, working with the makers of Ribena Plus, says parents can actually make the switch from work to a family mind-set and reconnect with their kids in just 12 minutes every evening by asking open-ended questions and sharing an activity with their child.
This time then sets parents up for a family focused evening full of quality time.
Claire said: “There is no one as tough on their own parenting skills as a parent – but this study shows there is no need for parents to be so harsh.
“It’s hard for working parents to juggle all their responsibilities and it can feel like guilt is simply a parent’s lot – but it’s absolutely not.
“By using clever tactics such as a little preparation alongside use of open ended questions – such as ‘Tell me what the best bit about your day was?’ – parents can reduce the time worrying about chores and work and spend more time learning about their children’s day.”
The research findings will be a welcome relief to UK parents, as the study shows they currently feel pressured to spend a staggering 186 minutes – over three hours – on other activities such as their commute, cooking dinner and household chores – over six times longer than they are able to devote to catching up with their children each night.
Preparing and eating dinner took the longest at 44 minutes, along with 25 minutes on chores and 15 minutes answering work emails and calls. The demands are so great it leaves parents with an average of just 30 minutes of uninterrupted time with their kids each weekday evening.
This leads to over two fifths worrying they are not a good enough parent during the week as they feel they just cannot fit in quality time with their children.
In fact parental anxiety is so great almost a quarter of parents also admit they would like advice and support on how to reconnect with their kids in this time.
So to help kick off this time, Claire has teamed up with parents to come up with ten open-ended questions to find out the most about their children’s day:
Age 3 – 4 years
- What are the names of the toys you played with today?
- Who is taller – mummy or your teacher?
- Tell me about the best game you played today...
Age 4 – 8 years
- Can you act out what you did at breaktime?
- Give you three guesses what I did today!
- How many times have you smiled today – what made you laugh?
Age 8 – 14 years
- I’ve got a great story for you but I want one in return…you first!
- Tell me some school gossip…I’m all ears!
- What science project are you doing at the moment and can I help with it?
- Where are you off to with your friends this week?
When asked what they wanted to know from their kids to reconnect with them after a busy day, parents say: what they did in lessons, their worries or what their favourite part of the day was.
More than a quarter admitted that they just want to be told their child loves them.
When asked what activities they like to do together in this time, a quarter of parents like to read with their child in this time, with 11 per cent playing a game or doing crafts.
Claire Halsey then used these parent ‘checklists’ to help define the 12 minute ‘We-connection Time’.
So to help parents make the most of their ‘We-connection Time’, the makers of Ribena Plus have crowd sourced ideas to create the Twelve Minute Manual, a handy book of 30 activities to do with your child.
Each idea is a fun activity – by parents, for parents – to do to reconnect while learning about your child’s day – from learning the moves to the latest pop hit to making up a story. Download it at: www.ribena.co.uk
Caroline Fredj, Senior Brand Manager for Ribena, said: “This study should spark the end of parental guilt and it proves to working parents that it’s possible to raise happy children without feeling guilty or pressured about your time.
“We want to help parents get the most from their time with their children, which is why we have created a Twelve Minute Manual of fun things to do - by parents for parents - to help families enjoy their time together!”
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