Valentine's Day on Female First

Valentine's Day on Female First

This week, news came out that the classic 90’s dating show Blind Date will be making a comeback and returning to our television screens. This no doubt led many forty somethings to reminisce about when they used to watch the show, in their twenties, during their University days. The dating landscape, of course, has changed a lot in the last fifteen to twenty years, not just due to the internet but technology in general. From the dating app to being dumped by text, technology has transformed how many people date and meet their partners. But is the return of Blind Date an indication that the tide is turning? Are we seeing the beginning of a backlash against technology and modern dating? In the same way that vinyl has come back round again in spite of download trends, is dating also about to go retro?

There is no doubt that technology has made internet dating cool and acceptable in a way that ‘the personals’ never were. Instantly clickable, with colour photos and no ghastly GSOH acronyms in them, they brought people together who might never have met, or have got the courage to speak to each other. It connects like-minded individuals through the sites themselves (Vegan sites, religious sites, sites for dog walkers etc. (and no, I have not made that last one up.)) and through the clever mathematical algorithms that predict who might have similar interests or backgrounds. However, the online dating experience is not always a moonlit walk in the park.

Firstly, it is very easy for people to set up a profile page online and not be what they seem. That can cause those minor disappointments where your date is older, larger or balder (!) than he portrayed on his page, to the more serious problems of discovering they were not at all who they said they were. This can risk both your heart (he’s already married), your wallet (there have been various scams that have used dating agencies to take money from their partners) or worse - your personal safety. Or perhaps, the secrecy of the online world is its appeal and it is you who wants to go incognito. But, as the Ashley Madison scandal revealed, personal data in the pubic cloud can be hacked, stolen and disseminated.

On Blind Date, as with matchmaking services that introduce people personally, the men (and women) have been vetted, not by a machine but by a human. This doesn’t give you any guarantees but it does make it far harder for people to lie, especially when the person introducing you has already met them face to face. Furthermore, people might find matches that might never have occurred online but that are perfect. Sometimes sharing the same hobbies or opinions or habits is not the formula for a varied dating or married life. Sometimes it’s something less tangible, something unmeasurable, even ineffable that makes you click with another person. It’s something friends could see but a machine, or even you, might not. After all, love is one of life’s most exciting mysteries and she won’t be conjured up automatically by a row of binary code. With a personal introduction people meet people not profiles.

Of course, Blind Date is just a bit of fun but the time of its revival is definitely interesting. Blind Date began when no-one credible dated strangers and the internet wasn’t around. People going on those random blind dates were a novelty. Now, with internet dating the norm, Blind Date is a novelty again, because we have forgotten the magic of the match maker. I am sure that technology isn’t going anywhere but just like the come back of vinyl records, there are strong signs that for our romantic life, it might be time for us all to go retro and offline.

Hayley Bystram is MD and Founder of Bowes-Lyon Partnership, an elite matchmaking agency with offices in Mayfair and Surrey. As a leading dating and relationship expert, Hayley specialises in bringing together eligible and accomplished individuals, who are looking for a committed and meaningful relationship. Founded in 2009, the agency has helped to create many long-term relationships, marriages and babies.


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