The word Masturbation comes from the Latin manus (hand) and stuprare (to soil). So is it any wonder it has been condemned as dirty for so many years! The Church still suggests masturbation is a perversion.
In today society we are much more liberal in our attitude, but even so few women will admit to masturbating even though 45% of us masturbate regularly.
Why is masturbation something to feel guilty or embarrassed about? In most cases it's our upbringing which forms our attitude, if parents forbid their children from touching their genitals, it can lead to issues later on in life and turn something that should be enjoyed into something dirty.
Finding your sexual balance Many studies have shown that women who masturbate enjoy much more active, fulfilled sex lives than those who don't.
Surprisingly the majority of women only achieve orgasm through masturbation, so if you don't give it a try think what you are missing. Masturbation is also the best way to get to discover your body and where you feel the most sensually. It will help you discover your clitoris, G spot and other erogenous zones. Once you know how to make yourself come, it will be easier to guide your partner so that both of you have a better sex life.
Use your fingers Sitting or lying down with your legs apart, use your hands to caress and stimulate your genitals.
Explore your vulva by opening your small and large set of lips to get to your clitoris at the front, use your index finger to gently stimulate your clitoris from top to bottom. If you're particularly sensitive, soft make circular movements until you find the rhythm that gives you the best sensations, maintain this until you reach orgasm.
If you're shy, use an object The vagina is deep and difficult to access with your hands. Use an object to help you. Get yourself a sex toy, or use the handle of a hairbrush, let your imagination take you and explore. If you're lazy, use a sex toy, Vibrating massage toys, clitoral stimulators and dildos, they are readily available either online or in store. You can use them sitting, standing or lying down: they're very easy to use and very effective.
Ideal if you don't want to put too much effort in or if you want to orgasm in minutes. Use them to stimulate your clitoris with vibration or simply manipulate them wherever feels good. The only downside is the cold contact of a plastic object, and don't get they may be addictive think Carrie Bradshaw. Seriously, there is a genuine risk of addiction to sex toys.
Solo or shared pleasure? Masturbation doesn't need compensate for a lack of sex and its just 'you' time to forget all constraints, and give in to all types of fantasies.
It can also be a shared pleasure if you choose to share masturbation with your partner, it's a sign of how close and trusting your relationship is. After all if he watches you pleasing yourself, he'll learn more about what you like when make love.
* Lovehoney.co.uk ships worldwide