A mortgage?
People differ in their definition of commitment according to Ocean Finance, so we take a look at the most common and why people view them as a pivotal point in their relationship.
Moving in- Wanting to share space with someone else when you might have slept in a double bed by yourself, lived on your own or had a lot of ‘you’ time can make moving in a big step for some. People over 55 are more inclined to believe that this is the surest way of confirming coupledom because you learn new things about each other, find ways to cohabit in peace and also discover how to diffuse arguments without the option of walking away.
Mortgage- Some couples say that there is more invested when they take out a mortgage than when they get married. Mortgages assume that you are going to be together for the next 25 years or more, so it’s a big commitment when you sign on the dotted line. It’s arguable that it’s the hardest to get out of- but it wouldn’t be a commitment if it wasn’t- perhaps affirming why people believe it to be so final.
Bills- Sharing the responsibility of paying for stuff no matter how big or small it is, can be a real negotiation point. For those who earn differing amounts- there is a lot of consideration that is required to be fair to both parties in the decision making process.
Joint bank accounts- Again the over 55s place a lot of importance in consolidating their money. Trusting each other with access to combined money can take courage if both have never done this before or had a bad experience with an ex in the past.
Talking about the future- For women this is a sure sign that their partner is for keeps, however if a partner’s heart is not in it, it can be an easy way to deceive someone too.
Saying ‘I love you’-This can be one of the hardest or easiest things to say depending on the person. Some may have never said it before and for others- the words may have lost their meaning. 18-24 years olds believe this to be a key point in their pairing. That said it takes little commitment to say those three words if they don’t believe it.
Introductions- If you want to share your partner with your family and friends, it shows that you are proud of them and want others to see why you are with them. A father- potential son in law moment is perhaps one of the most nerve wrecking for both parties and often people only let those they care about most into their family circle.
Joining Finances- 23% of adults believe that joining finances is one of the most public expressions to show that they are officially a couple.
Ian Williams, spokesman for Ocean, says: “It is interesting to see that a quarter of us mark the official start of coupledom from merging our finances. Whether it’s through moving in together, opening a joint bank account or sharing a credit card, it’s important to be open with each other about your financial history, as your union will be visible to see on credit reference agency records. This means you could inherit any bad credit history from your partner.”
“Although not very romantic, finding out how your partner has dealt with money in the past could help stop any surprises when you’re trying to take out credit in the future.”
It would seem that the young couples are the eternal optimists and the older generations are more practical in their ways of making their relationship official. And with no mention of marriage it begs the question- is a very public display of love necessary or do the smaller ones hold more weight?