Am I A Lesbian?

Rachael writes:

I am a twenty year old student who has never had a boyfriend or any close male friends.

I went to an all-girls school and grew up with three sisters, along with being excruciatingly shy.

I wonder if this is why I have absolutly no experience with guys. While I desperatly want a boyfriend, I also find my self having fantasies of lesbian sex, but i have never been attracted a real female in my life.

Instead just the idea of having sex with an anonymous females turns me on, but at the same time I do find some guys that I do know attractive.

But even with guys I often find myself fantasing about doing something forbidden with them .

Does this mean I'm bisexual or a lesbian?

Being a lesbian is just not an option in my family so please tell I am not!

Yin's Answer

It sounds to me as though you are very confused at the moment about your sexuality. You may be feeling as though you have sexual feelings towards women, but a lot of people may fantasise about such things, which doesn't make them a lesbian.

You may just have a vivid imagination, and it is more the unknown that you are fantasising about as opposed to women.

Don't be ashamed about it, as it is not something that you can help or control, and trying to suppress it will just make you go mad!

If you don't think you can tell your family then don't. Join a lesbian chat room and explore into your fantasies further.

Yang's Answer

There is a chance that you are a bi-sexual, but don't worry about it.

You don't have to act on the lesbian side of your sexuality, just stick to men. See if this satisfies you enough, and if not then it's time to look further afield.

Your family don't have to know about what is going on. After all fantasies are private, and if you want you sexuality to be so as well then keep it private.

Go for it, meet a girl and see what happens. The worst thing you could do is kid yourself.