Disabled Lover
Miss J asks:
I have a disabled partner who is in a wheelchair. I met him when he was in the chair but never understood the whole situation. He has no sensation from the nipples down - this causes real problems in the bedroom which means we hardly ever have sex.
We have been together 5 years and 3 months - I love this man with all my heart but this puts a massive strain on our lives and sex life together. What can I do?
You have been together for a long time and the situation has always been as it is so, in regards to your sex life, can you not revisit the beginning of your relationship and do as you did then? If not the only thing I can suggest is talking to your partner.
He has obviously been in this situation longer than you so may know better how to overcome it but you won't know unless you talk to each other.
Since he has no sensation in the lower half of his body, I'm assuming it is more of an issue for you then him. If your sex life is the only thing troubling you and your partner is not worried about it you may have to weigh up what you want more, sex or your partner. Bear in mind though, there are other things you can do though besides intercourse.
You came into this situation with your eyes open as you met your partner when he was in the wheelchair. Perhaps you made a mistake not discussing it with him fully at the beginning of the relationship but if you want to understand it more you must speak to him now before the stress ruins your relationship.
If sex is not an option perhaps you could concentrate more on foreplay to keep some sort of sex life alive in the relationship.
The only way to solve this situation is through communication. You need to talk to your partner and discuss your concerns so that you can move forward in the relationship.
Sex is not the be all and end all, surely your relationship is more than that.
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