'I have been having an affair...' - Sammie
Sammie asks:
I have been having an affair for the past two months and I am having the time of my life. I am getting exactly what I want from the relationship, being wined and dined nights away in top class hotels. I see him when I want and we have sex when I want it. The thing is I don’t want him as a permanent partner because I am having fun with no commitment. He knew when we got together how I felt but now he is telling me he loves me more than his wife and he wants to leave his wife for me, but I don’t want him to. I feel like he is trying to put pressure on me to have him for good. Should I end this relationship before he gets to hurt? What do you think you are doing? Not only are you playing with peoples lives but you have no respect for this man. I wonder why you ever got involved with him there are a lot of single blokes out there who want exactly the same as you no commitment, so why a married man I ask myself? Have you ever been cheated on in a relationship by someone is that why you seem to be so bitter and cruel? If you haven’t I hope you do because you will then know at first hand how it feel. I think you should end this relationship get out and get a life of your own. End it now!
I think it’s a case of all good things must come to an end. If everything has been on your terms then obviously he is turned on by the submissive role, so no wonder he has fallen for you. Two choice’s, either string him along and prolong things as long as you can, but remember this, if he does leave his wife then he will be constantly on your case, and if you do move in together then you will become “The Wife” and he will sooner or later start looking around again for excitement. Other than that you can be brutally honest with him and say to him what you have put in this letter. He will either call it a day, or if he does like the submissive role then it will be what he wants and things will carry on in the style you want. I must say though, I would look for another victim because I don’t think this one will be the answer. By the way have you never considered why it is you can not settle into a steady relationship, are you carrying some “baggage?”
