Housewife asks :

Hi Lucy,

Me and my best friend of the same sex have been sleeping with each other. We both have boyfriends and kids and are all in a very close circle of friends, what should we do? I don’t want to stop anything but don’t want anyone to get hurt.

Hi Housewife,

Agony Aunts on Female First

Agony Aunts on Female First

Perhaps you need to decide who you want to be with, your boyfriend or your friend. It is inevitable when you are unfaithful that someone will get hurt, even if you intend not to tell your partner, things like this usually find a way of making their way out into the public domain.

Who do you feel that you will be happier and a better mum with; your friend or your boyfriend? Maybe it might help you if you were to ask your friend how she feels- if this is just sex or if it’s more. If you give everything up to find that she only wanted a bit of fun you could end up getting hurt. How do you feel about her? Are you falling in love with her or do you just see it as an act rather than a commitment?

If this comes out, then chances are it will change your relationship and your group dynamic if you say you are all friends together, so it’s important to keep that in mind. You also have your children to think of, if you do decide to go your separate ways then maybe you need to try and minimise the damage for them too. You both have a lot at stake so perhaps you just need to be honest with one another about what the nature of this relationship is before making any more decisions. 


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