Scared asks :
Hi Lucy,
My sister-in-law is best friends with my husband's ex and it bothers me to the point where I get nightmares and live in constant fear that she's enabling my husband to cheat on me with his ex! Help, I am losing my mind and I have two boys who need me to be the best me!
Hi Scared,
Agony Aunts on Female First
Chances are this situation is worse as generally an ex falls out of the picture after a break up. If she is still attending family get togethers and crops up in conversation, it will be hard to forget about her and your husband too.
Why would your sister in law do that? Has she openly told you that she doesn’t like you or that she doesn’t think that you and your husband make a good couple? It makes life difficult but the person who’s opinion counts of you is your husband's not hers. If she openly tries to cause a problem between you and your husband then perhaps you need to talk to her with your husband to find the source of her inerference so that everyone is on the same page.
Does your husband see his ex, even if his sister does? If he does not make contact with her then perhaps there is nothing to worry about. If you love and trust your husband then even if his sister was trying to play matchmaker- he can easily ignore it and say no.
Have you talked to your husband about your concerns? If he knew that it bothered you so much then perhaps you can agree that you won’t attend any gatherings she will be at- or ask that she don’t get invited if it’s a close family event.
If you have two boys that need the best from their parents, then perhaps you need to communicate more with your husband about your worries. An effective team means effective communication. If the roles were reversed then he might feel insecure about an ex in the picture, so he may be more understanding than you anticipate.
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