Does my husband of 31 years still have feelings for his ex?

by Lucy Moore | 1 February 2016

Hi Winnie,

Agony Aunts on Female First

The reality is- your husband had a past before you and he got together. Everyone has a history that doesn't involve their current partner because no couple has been together for their entire lives.

His ex-formed part of that past and just as you might talk about people from school, college, university or your first job- he might talk about the person he had a romantic relationship with. His previous partner is someone who shared a time with him, so it's bound to have made an impression- relationships always do- however short or long they are.

Many people advise couples not to talk about their exes but if it's in the sense of the lessons you've learned and why being with your current partner is better than being with your ex- it can have a positive outcome.

It doesn't necessarily mean he still has feelings for her- if he did- why did he marry you?

Have you told him how it makes you feel? If you haven't then perhaps you could- however if you talk about your ex/exes too then it's simply an exchange of your previous experiences and people you've come into contact with in that time. Perhaps it's nothing more than that.

If you don't feel like talking about your ex/exes then perhaps you both deal with your history in different ways. He might like to talk about it and you may not- we all deal with our previous partnerships in different ways.

---

by Lucy Moore for relationships.femalefirst.co.uk
find me on and follow me on