Dot asks :

 My boyfriend is about to meet his 16 year old son for the first time. The boys mum seems to want a big part in their meeting. What should I do to keep my man?

Hi Dot,

Agony Aunts on Female First

Agony Aunts on Female First

Just because he is meeting his son for the first time does not mean that he will go back to his ex because she is there too.

This should be more about his son and him than any other relationship. She may just want to be there to oversee things and to make sure that he is comfortable in his father's company. Leaving them alone with each other may put too much pressure on them both and make the meeting unproductive.

16 is not very old to be taking in so much information, so he likely needs the support of his mum for such a big moment in his life.

Perhaps try to focus on being there for your partner through listening to him when he needs to talk about it and how he feels both before and after.

Perhaps try not to take the focus off the moment with worries about your relationship, as this might drive him away rather than bring you closer together if it's more than he can handle at once.

This is undoubtedly a challenging time in your relationship, as exs on the scene can cause some uncertainly and insecurity- however they are meeting up for different reasons this time. Most importantly- his son is about to have a mother and a father in his life and if you think your partner will make a good dad and is deserving of this, then it can only be a good thing.


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