Julie asks :
Hi Lucy,
Since my mum died of cancer two years ago I can't enjoy life without thinking of my own demise and leaving my two boys- I'm a single parent aged 44. I keep thinking ‘what's the point?’ of anything when I'm going to die? Any advice to stop this negative feeling would be helpful. Thank you Julie.
Hi Julie,
Agony Aunts on Female First
It is natural and normal to focus on your own life after someone close to you has passed away. It gives us a new perspective on life- sometimes this can be positive and sometimes it can go in the other direction and make us fixate on death.
It sounds like you may be lacking someone to talk to or some support here. If you have two boys to think about, maybe you have neglected your own needs for theirs, which can be easy to do as a parent. So perhaps you need someone close or a professioanl to reach out to; to help you and inevitably help your sons too.
Do you have any other family or friends you could talk to about this? Perhaps you need to get in touch and ask them to be a sounding board of a little while. If you have not talked about these feelings and they have built up since your mother died, then maybe that is why they have become so negative. If you have no release i.e. you have not spoken about it as honestly as you might need to- then maybe it is hard to know where to start.
I would suggest some counselling if you feel that you would rather keep these thoughts confidential. If you pay a visit to your doctor, they should be able to refer you to one. This will allow you to talk very openly about what has gone through your mind since your loss. I would also suggest The Samaritans who can offer a confidential listing service if you need some support in between sessions.
tagged in Cancer
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