Tamika asks :
Hi Lucy,
I've been in a rocky relationship for 3yrs. Over Christmas I found myself growing close to another man. We soon chose to end seeing each other before anything happened out of respect for my relationship. Six months on I am still constantly thinking about the other guy and feel even stronger feelings for him and feel less for my current relationship. Is it love or lust? Should or I go for it? Or stay put?
Hi Tamika,
Agony Aunts on Female First
When people are in a 'rocky relationship’ it is tempting to look elsewhere- however there could be two reasons for this.
If you forget this other guy for a moment- were you thinking of leaving your partner? If the answer is ‘yes’, then chances are your relationship has taken its toll on you and this guy coming along is just a coincidence.
If it’s ‘no’ then maybe this man has highlighted some things that are lacking with your boyfriend. If he fills gaps that your partner has left wide open, then there is a good chance you will favour him over your man of three years. It can make the things that turn your relationship ‘rocky’ even more prominent.
It could be lust if your sex life at home is not what you want it to be. The question is, are you willing to put in the effort to get your relationship back on track? If you love your partner and want to make things work, then perhaps start there and see if you can build on your existing foundations.
However if you don’t want to or feel it might do no good, then maybe it’s time to call it a day and see where things go with this new guy.
tagged in Christmas Love Relationship yin and yang agony aunt
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