Madiha asks :
Hi Lucy,
Do you help with relationship issues..? I was wondering if you could help I always think negatively about everything and afraid if everything, my mind thinks the worst and this is causing relationship issues between me and my fiancée what can i do i am really upset..?
Hi Madiha,
Agony Aunts on Female First
Perhaps you could write a journal of your feelings and write not only your negative thoughts but also find the good things in your life to try and alter your mind-set towards a more positive one. This gives you chance to put things into perspective and look for alternatives and help if you need it. If this is a habit, then it will be hard to break – it can be difficult to to focus on the negatives when there is so much negativity around us in the news- but on a more personal level- you might have more control than you think over your reactions to events.
For instance- if these feelings are affecting your relationship- have you talked to your partner about it or do they just see the result of these feelings? A suppressed mood, frustration, or anger? If you only show the product of these feelings without an explanation then you could be overlooking the possibility that they can help you. The more you talk things out, the more you can work together as a team to help you get through. If there is anything they can do to make changes on their part- then this could be the trigger.
If you are finding it hard to pinpoint the route of your negativity and fear then it might be worth seeking some professional help to explore the reasons for this. Perhaps go to your doctor and ask for a referral to a counsellor so you can talk to someone impartially about the things that are dominating your thoughts right now.
Either way talking to someone- either close to you or a stranger might help you make sense of where you are now, how you have got to this point and where you want to be.
tagged in Relationship yin and yang agony aunt fiance
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