Hi Hazel,

I would suggest that you be a support for both of them if you feel he is like a son to you. Advice can sometimes be detrimental if the result of it is negative. If you stay in touch with him and show him he is still welcome in your family, then he might wait for her anyway if he doesn’t want to throw away what he has with all of you too.

Even if you advise him to wait, that doesn’t necessarily mean he will. He will make his own way when he feels he is ready. If you can be a listening board right now then that is perhaps one of the best things you can do for him. Your daughter might come to you when she finally feels she can tell you all the truth, and then you can be there for her too. 

As long as he knows that if they do go their separate ways he doesn't need to lose touch with you then that could be a great comfort for him right now.