Sophie asks :
Hi Lucy,
I'm falling in love with a guy I work with. I'm 20 he's 35 and he's just split up with his girlfriend. We've been having an affair for about 6 months now, and he always says I mean everything to him and so on. I want to tell him to be with me because he'll be happiest that way, but don't know whether I should or not. Help.
Hi Sophie,
Agony Aunts on Female First
If you feel this way and he is now single, perhaps it is the ideal time to ask him if this is going anywhere. His girlfriend might have provided a barrier to asking this question before, however now- that she is out of the picture it could be a valid time to broach the subject.
If he says the things he does, it is not unreasonable to want to know if he is saying them in the moment or because he sees a future with you.
You say that you think he will be 'happiest this way', however it may be worth asking him if he agrees with you, because that's your opinion. Perhaps try to explore if you are on the same page without making assumptions first.
If what you want is a relationship, then maybe you need to ask about the direction you are taking or you may never know. That way you can try being a couple, leave it as a casual relationship or go your separate ways if your future plans don't align.
tagged in Affair
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