Rose asks :
Dear Lucy,
I am really depressed over my boyfriend's past. He is my first, we're both 24, both virgins but I was not his first kiss. He had a silly relationship at school when he was 14 and I can't seem to get over it. I know it's such a petty thing to worry about but when I read things online everyone is always saying that your first kiss is magical and the best kiss of your life and you never forget it...I can't accept the fact that he shared it with another girl and I feel less special, that she is better than me and all the kisses we have can never be as good as his kiss with her. I know this is irrational but I can't help it...I think of it all the time and it's ruining our relationship.
Hi Rose,
Agony Aunts on Female First
It can be hard to accept that your partner has had another relationship before you, however most people have. The main thing is that he picked you- not her.
First kisses are not always the magical thing that they are made out to be. First kisses can be awkward and uncomfortable- if he has not told you a lot about it, then chances are you have built it up to be far more special that it actually was. It might have been a slobbery disaster.
Kissing is as much about an emotional connection as it is the physical act. If he loves you then kisses with you will automatically mean much more to him that this other girl. Chances are if it's been 10 years since- he can’t even remember what it was like.
He has saved himself for you and you for him and when you do share the physical side of your relationship, then this bond should be far stronger than anything he had with another woman.
Perhaps try to focus on your future rather than dwelling on his past. He didn’t do it to deliberately make you feel this way, so try not to blame him. Everyone has a past, so try not to let it ruin what you have now and affect what joys you have to come.
tagged in Kiss Relationship boyfriend yin and yang agony aunt
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