Sarah asks :

Hi Lucy,

I am a 25 (almost 26) year old student and I have never had a boyfriend. I have male friends, but none of whom I am interested in romantically or vice versa. On the occasion that someone has been interested in me, it was never going to work, as they lived abroad. Home grown boys just aren't into me! It's true that despite being a student, I don't go out much, as I'm frequently to be found being a book worm at home! I also live alone, which I actually find makes it harder to force myself to get up and go out and do things. People find me "nice" but I also fear that I am not interesting or engaging enough to attract someone. I am quite an independent person but am ready to welcome someone into my life. I just don't think it's going to happen any time soon. Any advice?

Hi Sarah,

Agony Aunts on Female First

Agony Aunts on Female First

Perhaps it’s time to join a group in something you love- like a book group or reading group- combine your favourite things with getting yourself out there socialising. At least that way you can practice your social skills and get more comfortable around other people, including potential dates. And who knows where that might lead?

There might be one at university but you can usually find them in coffee shops and libraries. It is also a great starting point because you know that the conversation you will have will be about stuff you know, which might give you that extra confidence boost.

It is great that you have acknowledged that you are ready for someone in your life, and that you are not just thinking about it because of pressure from friends or family. It you are ready, then that should make you more willing and open to potential romances once you get out there.

It sounds like you are very interesting and engaging- you have read a lot of books, you are a student and you are independent enough to live alone, all of these are things to be proud of and talk about.

If you can talk to complete strangers at a book club then you can do anything.


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