Haley Hill
‘It’s got to be perfect: the memoirs of a modern-day matchmaker’ is a novel inspired by my 6 years as a matchmaker. I founded, and recently sold, the UK’s biggest matchmaking agency so had plenty of fodder for a book! It’s a fun Chick-Lit style read, which demonstrates, through the characters’ relationships, how we have been conditioned to aspire to a ‘glossy brochure’ happy ever after. Aside from the deeper premise, there’s also lots of fun stuff too: a broken penis, a dog on Viagra and feminist anarchy at a lap dancing club! Reviewers have compared it to Sex and the City and a modern-day Bridget Jones.
What were your big ideals back when you were young?
Like most young women, I was extremely idealistic. I thought everyone should, and, more importantly, would find their happy ever after. By my mid-twenties I’d had my heart broken several times and a wedding cancelled at the final hour. But no matter how devastated I was, I never gave up on my ideals. They were what drove me to set up the agency. I was determined to find love for all the lonely hearts in the world. On reflection, I suppose I was wondering where my happy ever after was too.
Please tell us how you set up your own matchmaking agency from scratch?
It’s hilarious how naive I was. I had no business plan, no investment and no experience. I quit my job (as a pharmacist) and had just about enough savings for a laptop and some business cards. Then I went out to the bars and clubs in London, tapping people on the shoulder and asking them if they were single. I’m sure most people thought I was a bit weird! However, a few people gave me a chance and when I had successfully paired them off, they began referring their friends. Soon word got out and the business grew surprisingly quickly.
Please tell us how you met your husband.
I didn’t start the business with the intention of finding a man for myself. However, at my launch party as I was introducing people, I noticed James chatting to a group of people and was instantly attracted to him. Before, with previous boyfriends, I’d always had a mental tick-list, but when I saw James, with his beaming smile, and sparkling eyes - I know it sounds cliche - but I knew I wanted to be with him. It hasn’t been all hearts and flowers though and we’ve both had our issues to work on. But there’s no doubt we love each other and eight years down the line, while we’re wrangling willful twin toddlers and a disobedient dog, love goes a long way.
Why can your book appeal to both men and women?
It’s funny you should ask that, because I wrote it with a female audience in mind. However, since it’s been released, I’ve had lots of men saying how much they enjoyed it and how refreshingly honest they found it. I think typical Chick-lit tends to gloss over the rough edges of relationships but I wanted to give as honest a depiction as possible. To cover all the issues we’re uncomfortable talking about and don’t like to admit. I think men respond well to such frankness. Also, because I matched as many men as I did women, I like to think I have a good understanding of their perspective too.
One common reaction to your book is how funny it is, so have you always been a naturally humorous person?
I’ve always loved to entertain people and I grew up in a family that always used humour to offset emotionally tense situations. Also, I think being truly honest about feelings and circumstances is what makes people laugh. Because they can relate. Even though sometimes they might not like to admit it.
Why are people often fickle about dating?
I wouldn’t say we are so much fickle as confused. We are given so many messages by the media and society about what we should want, who we should date, how we should be living our lives that it’s easy to lose touch with who we are and what we really want.
How important is it to have a wish list of your ideal partner?
We all have one, don’t we? But as I said, they often comprise a combination of the characteristics we’ve been conditioned to want or think we want rather than what we really want. When I was a matchmaker, I’d secretly strike through all the superficial requests on my client’s wish list like ‘six-pack’ or ‘big boobs’. In most cases they’d end up falling for someone they wouldn’t have considered ‘on paper’. Much of my job was negotiating such criteria.
At what point did you decide that your experience is your job was worth moulding into fiction?
I think it was the moment I sold the business. I was pregnant with my twin girls and ready to hand over cupid’s bow and arrow to the next matchmaker in line, but at the same time part of me was desperate to document everything I had learned. Over six years, I’d personally interviewed thousands of singles and as a company tens of thousands. There was no way I could keep all that inside!
What is next for you?
Everyone keeps asking me that. Up until now, I’ve always had a five-year plan but now I have no idea. I touched on motherhood and marriage in ‘It’s Got to Be Perfect’, so I might explore the next stages of love a little more. Either way, I’m certain I’ll always be writing about, or researching relationships and romantic love. The topic fascinates me.
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