I have Tony Blair to thank for inspiring me to start The Forgiveness Project. In February 2003 I went on the ‘Stop the War’ march in London’s Hyde Park where over a million people tried to convince our then Prime Minister that invading Iraq was not something that the British people wanted. Tony Blair heard the public outcry but he did not listen. The march had no impact whatsoever other than to motivate and mobilize people like me to do something creative with our anger.
Marina Cantacuzino
In 1987 when I was working at Tyne Tees Television I came second in the Great Northern Poetry Prize. The prize was a week-long Arvon Foundation residential poetry course. I’m embarrassed to say I never went – it was the thought of all those strangers and writing poetry for week! But I’ve always regretted it. This year, incredibly, I’ve been asked to teach on one of the Arvon courses with writer and campaigner Melissa Benn. It feels like a beautiful symmetry.
Talking of regrets….having spent 15 years thinking about forgiveness, I now feel I want to focus my attention on regret and how people deal with their disappointments. As Lewis Carroll said: “In the end we only regret the chances we didn’t take, the relationships we were afraid to have and the decision we waited too long to make.”
I was the main breadwinner for 20 years while my husband was a househusband. For most of that time I was a freelance journalist writing about other people’s lives. I had the best of it at a time when you could earn a living from journalism, when there were plenty of openings, and before editors developed an insatiable appetite for prurient detail which made me start to feel I was exploiting people’s stories.
My brother died when I was 21. He was 17 and suffered from Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy. Growing up with a disabled sibling who I knew would always die has informed my work and life. I always assumed I’d inherit the genetic mutation and my sons might also be at risk but thankfully I was wrong. I have a healthy son who is 20 now.
I’m mad about audio books and was cured from insomnia by starting to listen to Victorian literature in bed at night. There is something about the dense, intricate language and the intense inner drama that grips but also soothes me. I’ve been listening to Elizabeth Gaskell’s Wives and Daughters for six months now!
When I was at school I was good friends with Nigella Lawson. We grew apart in our late teens. But last year I was walking through Haggerston when I dropped into a café under the railway arches. I spotted Nigella there, all made up and looking beautiful, preparing to film for her new TV programme. She didn’t see me and so I slipped out of the shop telling myself she was busy working. But actually it was because too many years had passed and I wasn’t sure what to say
Marina Cantacuzino, journalist and founder of The Forgiveness Project‘s new book Forgiveness is Strange is out now. She’ll also be discussing her book at this year’s Queen’s Park Book Festival which is taking place Saturday 30th June and Sunday 1st July. For more information and to book tickets please visit: www.qpbookfest.com