Goodbye Mr Ex
What can you tell us about your new book Goodbye Mr Ex?
It’s an insightful book, which is an extremely easy read that will give women the seven steps to move on from their ex relationship no matter what the situation is. It’s an essential must read for any woman going through heartbreak and who wishes to leave the past behind her.
There are seven factors that will help you get over your ex according to your book, what are these?
- Commitment
- Seeing your Ex as Reflection of You
- Heal Your Conscious Story
- Heal Your Unconscious Story
- Inquire To Challenge Assumptions and Expectations
- Focus on Language
- Transform Through Gratitude
- Support and Share
Why do you think people are turning to books rather than other approaches to help them through this difficult period?
With the economy where it stands, people do not want to risk their money on something they may have not known much about. This way they don’t need to spend a lot of money but still get the value they need to work through their challenges.
What is the most common feeling or complaint when a relationship has ended?
Everyone has their own story of why it ended. For women who are left by their exes, the usual complaint is that he didn’t give them a good enough or no reason for the break up/divorce followed by missing him (there won’t be anyone else like him). For women who leave - their main complaint is how guilty their ex makes them feel for having done so.
When did your interest in in relationship dissolution begin?
It was when I went through my own divorce in 2007. The pain opened up an insatiable curiosity to understanding why relationships don’t work, what was missing in mine and how I could avoid making the same mistakes again.
Tell us about your background.
I am a qualified relationship coach, recognised by the International Coaching Federation, a matrix-reimprinting and Neuro Linguistic Programming practitioner as well as a Demartini Facilitator - a mind balancing tool. I have been working in the coaching/facilitator field since 2010 and have been working with women to overcome heartbreak for the last year. I guess I have always been a deep thinker and have used my own experiences as an opportunity to understand and work through my own challenges.
What is a normal day like in your world?
Normal?! I am an early riser. I get up at about 6am and will usually write a blog post either for YourTango.com or Huffington Post UK. Then at about 10am I will go off to yoga/meditation for two hours. I will then get started on marketing my book on different social media platforms, or work on an online course that I am designing and then I will coach three or four clients through their heartbreak. Then some dinner, read and answer my emails before going to bed.
In break ups why do we tend to think there is something wrong with us rather than just a bad matching?
This is really down to our belief systems and how we process what happens to us. Immediately thinking that we have done something wrong is just another belief system that comes at us from a young age. This is how most of us are brought up, thinking that when someone does something to us it’s because they were doing it because of us. I would say the reason why anyone does anything has nothing to do with the other person but more to do with their beliefs systems, fears, education etc.
What is first thing anyone who is experiencing a break up can do to move on?
Seek the help if they can , if not, to feel the emotions that they feel and then release them by going into a park (preferably with no-one around) and scream and shout - rather like have a grown up tantrum. This way the emotions (energy in motion), has somewhere to go. The problem is if it stays in the body, it will fester and can make them feel worse. They will feel a lot better after doing so - but they have to be fully committed to do doing so.
What is next for you?
I am going to be launching my online Goodbye Mr Ex Accelerator programme in March and will be running the introduction webinar in February with The Goodbye Mr Ex, Whats Next Retreat in Bali, where women will learn fall in love with themselves again.
I am also in the process of planning my next book on guilt for women. Goodbye To Guilt - A Woman's Guide To Living A Guilt Free Life In Relationships.
Click here to buy Goodbye Mr Ex by Marina Pearson
Female First Lucy Walton