Five signs you deserve more from your partner

30 May 2018

When you love someone, you’ll be prepared to go above and beyond for them, making sure they feel appreciated and letting them know how much they mean to you. However, for even the most selfless people, there comes a time when we start to yearn for something back. If you’re constantly showing unwavering loyalty, giving presents or signs of adoration, it can feel disappointing if your partner doesn’t reciprocate.

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Of course, everyone will show their appreciation in different ways and everyone welcomes different kinds of affection, whether that be through receiving gifts or coming home to find a bath has been run for you. However, if you are feeling neglected or that you deserve more, it can leave many of us wondering if it would be better to call time on the relationship. It’s tempting to want to forgive and forget, but there comes a time when people realise that they deserve better, however painful that may be.

Ben Edwards, a self-confidence expert and relationship coach, understands the importance of people realising their own value and recognising unhealthy relationships. Here are 5 signs that you deserve more from your partner:

You’re constantly wishing they would do something nice for you

First of all, every relationship is different, some people will be content with certain things while others will not. If you are the type of person who feels good and confident when someone does nice things for you on a regular basis, don’t feel like you have to play this down. If you have expressed this to your partner but still feel resentful that they are seldom thoughtful, it’s a sign that you need or deserve more.

You feel you have to adapt your personality

You should be with someone who allows you to be yourself and who will support what you do even if its not something they are particularly interested in. You don’t have to have all the same interests or do everything together, but if you feel that you are hiding or suppressing aspects of your personality for someone else, it might be time to address how healthy that is. Adapting your personality won’t lead to overall happiness and it’s okay to want to find someone who will love the real you and see your true value.

You frequently feel disappointed

Feeling let down often is a clear sign that you deserve more from your partner. A relationship should leave you feeling secure and looking forward to seeing one another, this is all part of a healthy relationship and feeling disappointed can lead to despondence. While the thought of ending a relationship might feel even more disappointing, its important to remember that you deserve to be with someone who doesn’t let you down and is as equally invested in the relationship as you are.

You feel resentful

Starting to realise you deserve more in a relationship can bring about lots of different emotions. Sometimes the thought of ending a relationship is so painful that we end up settling for less than we warrant. This can often lead to resentment or anger towards our partner if they aren’t treating us in the way that we want them to. Feeling resentful will only cause arguments and make both of you unhappy.

You’re constantly waiting for something to change

When you realise you aren’t happy in the relationship or start to feel that you want more, it’s important to communicate this to your partner. Hopefully, this will improve things as it might bring something to their attention that they hadn’t been aware of. However, if it doesn’t, you will not only feel ignored, but you’re likely to be waiting for things to change. It’s normal to want to give those we love the benefit of the doubt, but for your overall happiness, this can only go so far. If you’re always waiting for things to improve or hoping that ‘one day’ things will be different, it’s likely to be a sign that you deserve someone who make you happy in the present.