Illicit Encounters has revealed that we take after our parents for more than looks and personality, but for our relationship behavior too. Seven out of ten women who cheat on their parents are daughters of mothers who were also unfaithful, with many thinking that this somehow gives them permission to follow in their footsteps (73%).
Relationships on Female First
It’s not just women however, men also have affairs if their fathers were unfaithful, just not to the extreme that women do. There is the notion of the ‘cheating gene’, that speculates that if you are the child of cheaters, you will end up being one yourself. Realistically there is less of a backlash from family, because parents can’t criticize if they have done the very same thing as their daughter or son.
Only 22% of women would give up the affair if their mother disapproved, compared to 25% of men if their father told them to stop, so it would seem that most would carry on despite whatever their parents view of it.
An Illicit Encounters spokesman said: "If you want to know if your wife will cheat, you may want to take a close look at your mother-in-law. Cheating does run in the family, particularly on the female side.
"Women idolise their mother as they grow up and follow their good and bad behaviour. If their parents divorce or their mother confides in them about previous affairs, women are far more likely to do the same when they marry themselves."
Illicit Encounters member Louise Van der Velde, 40, has had five affairs with married men, despite having only been on the site for a year. She seconds the study’s results, as all of the men she has had an affair with had parents who cheated on their partners.
Louise, the widow of a GP, said: "Cheating runs in the family. Sons or daughters of cheats fear the disapproval of their parents far less because they know they have been unfaithful too. One of the men I have been seeing is a wealthy banker from Surrey whose mother has been married three times. He grew up with her dating a succession of different men and that affected his behaviour as he got older. His mother is aware that he cheats on his wife and they have kept the secret between themselves. She told him, 'Well, I can hardly start lecturing you after the way I've behaved. Some of them tell their mums all about their affairs. They have a good gossip about it. In some cases, their mothers are still having affairs any way – so they are sharing tips on how to keep them secret.”
Louise, who breaks the mould, as both of her parents were faithful, sees men on Illicit Encounters despite being ENGAGED to fiance Mark Howard, 39, a fitness instructor.
She said: "I am completely honest and open with Mark and he understands that I don't think it is normal for a woman to say faithful to the same man for 30 or 40 years. Life really is too short for that."
Mark, who lives with Louise in Camberley, Surrey, said: "I am fully aware of Louise's lifestyle and don't see anything wrong with it. We are completely honest with each other. It is great that there are sites like Illicit Encounters which can accommodate her needs.
So if you are unhappy in your relationship and can’t afford to have a mortgage of your own would you consider an affair?