We all know that being charitable can boost your mood, but did you also know that it could improve your love life too? eharmony’s relationship expert Verity Hogan reveals why altruism makes you more attractive.
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Everyone knows that giving makes you feel good. Whether you choose to give up your time volunteering at your local dogs’ home or always pick up a copy of the Big Issue, acting charitably activates the pleasure system in our brains, boosting self-esteem and offering a renewed sense of purpose. And as if that wasn’t enough, new research has revealed that being altruistic can improve your love life too!
The relationship between altruism and attraction
While we might think we’re drawn to bad boy-types, a recent survey conducted by the experts at eharmony found that altruism is one of the most attractive qualities someone can possess. Alongside charitable partner JustGiving, the relationship site found that almost a third of Brits (32%) would find a potential partner more attractive if they had a charitable streak.
If philanthropy is important to you, it’s definitely worth mentioning it on your dating profile. The survey found that singles who showcase their charitable credentials online attract more attention. Singles who include keywords like charity, volunteering, giving or donating on their online dating profiles receive over a third more communication (34%) than those who don’t.
Even so, you might not even need to shout about it. Online daters who appear to be innately more generous – based on their responses to eharmony’s Relationship Questionnaire – have been found to receive around 80% more messages than their less charitable romantic rivals.
Altruistic couples and compatibility
Altruism – the ability to show selfless concern for the wellbeing of others – has long been an important quality in relationships. In fact, our research team believes it’s so integral they’ve made it one of the 18 dimensions they use to help predict romantic compatibility.
Couples that share altruistic traits prioritise caring for others in the same way, so you’re less likely to get into an argument over who’s turn it is to take the recycling out. Research also suggests that altruistic singles tend to end up happier in their relationships, perhaps because they’re generous-hearted behaviour also applies to their partner.
Problems tend to occur when people have significantly different levels of altruism. Unsurprisingly, this can lead to conflict. If you score low on altruism, it’s highly likely that you’ll feel frustrated with a partner who spends every Saturday volunteering or prioritises donating over date night.
Where can I find an altruistic date?
It’s good news for the North West – Liverpool and Manchester are the most charitably-minded cities in the UK, closely followed by Belfast, Cardiff and Northampton.
If you don’t fancy moving cross-country to find that special someone then don’t despair; more than half of all Brits donate money to charity and 66% of those who do give, give regularly.
Looking to impress an altruistic date? Consider skipping the flowers and chocolates and offering a donation to their favourite charity in their name instead. Our survey found that 1 in 5 Brits would prefer this to a traditional romantic gift.
Feeling inspired to share the love? Head over to eharmony’s JustGiving page to show off your altruistic side and donate today.
tagged in Partner Relationship Attraction