Erin asks :

Hi Lucy,

Two of my very close friends hate each other, my friendship group has been torn in two groups because of this and I am stuck in the middle. So I can never go out with everyone anymore. Do I choose a side or do I remain friends with both groups?

Hi Erin,

Agony Aunts on Female First

Agony Aunts on Female First

I would suggest that you stay on neutral ground- it sounds like the falling out is nothing to do with you, so perhaps stay friends with both of them.

If they try to make you take sides- ignore it- friendship should not be dependent on who else you consider to be your friend. The focus should be on your time with whoever you are with in that moment.

If they demand that you take sides or try to encourage you to speak badly of the other person, then they are putting you in an unnecessarily awkward position. If they go down this road, it will help you to find out who really is your friend and who is just using you for information.

You could suggest going out with each of them separately- as this might be the only solution if they won't go out together. If you enjoy the company of both, then you should still be able to go out with whoever you choose. If they have not hurt you directly- then there is no reason for hating them too.


by for relationships.femalefirst.co.uk
find me on and follow me on


tagged in

Need Help?

If you need help or advice, you can ask Yin & Yang. It's quick, easy, free and you don't have to leave your real name.