SS asks :

Hi Lucy,

 

How should I get my friends to come out with me more?

Hi SS,

Agony Aunts on Female First

Agony Aunts on Female First

I would suggest making a plan. If you are always the one who tags along with other people's arrangements it might be time to take change and come up with some fun ideas and arrange the details so all they have to do is turn up. If you take turns at this then no one ever feels like it's their responsibility to always have to come up with the ideas.

I would also give them plenty of notice. If you are spontaneous with your outings then perhaps they have already made plans by the time you decide what it is you want to do. If you give them a few days then chances are they will be free. Maybe you could text them to keep up the momentum before you do go out and that way the excitement will build and you may have less people dropping out at the last minute.

Make sure that there is something to suit everyone. If you have a hobby or interest that they don't share then it might be time to compromise and do something that the majority wants to do. Perhaps share your passions with another like-minded group of friends so you can still talk about them with someone.

You could try to end up with groups of friends who satisfy each part of your life so you can enjoy your time together more and get the most out of seeing each one. For example one group might like to go to the cinema and another that enjoys a meal out; whatever it is that brings you together try to tailor your friendship circles accordingly.

Your friends should want to spend time with you- even if you are doing very little. If they frequently refuse you, then it might be time to find a new group who are willing to see more of you without you feeling like you have to persuade them to do so.


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