Gemma asks :
Hi Lucy,
There is this guy I began talking to a while ago and we started to getting quite close. Then he asked me out but I said no because I didn't think I liked him as anything more than just a friend (also he isn't exactly the nicest of looking or skinniest of guys, that's quite shallow of me but I had to say it). We continued to talk for another month or so then there was a fall out in our group of friends and we stopped talking. Recently now I haven't been talking to him I have realised how much I miss him. The other day he text me and we started talking and had a huge big conversation for an hour. I realised now how much I like him but I am afraid of what my friends might think. I’m afraid to get close to him again for the same thing to happen. Please help, what should I do?
Hi Gemma,
Agony Aunts on Female First
It seems that you are torn between your perception of this potential relationship and what everyone else thinks of it.
The most important thing to remember is that looks can be responsible for initial attraction to someone but there is so much more to a relationship than just this. If you can talk to him and have that strong connection- that is the thing that keeps a romance alive- looks are just a very small part of it.
I know it’s difficult not to consider what others think of you and what you do in life- but their opinion should not stop you from potentially finding love. People talk- it’s a fact of life- you may not like what they say but if they are scathing about your new relationship on the basis of this guy’s appearance – they are not your real friends. They might date people who are extremely attractive and not be able to talk on the phone for an hour with their partner or miss each other when they are apart.
If he asks you out again- why not see how things go? It might be worth giving him a chance for a few dates and see if there is anything in it. If you find that you are better as friends then at least you know and can aim to get back to where you are now. You might find that you both fall easily into being a couple.
tagged in Love romance couple Relationship Date friend yin and yang agony aunt
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